Yeah I about krapped my pants when I saw him. I had already cleaned my south coop and checked my broody...I was on the north end of the north coop scraping the dropping boards. The hens were just having a fit. Usually it's over who nests where, and your in my nesting box, blah, blah, blah. I was hollering at them telling them to shut up or else....Iwas on my way to scrape the south dropping boards, when I noticed they were all on the floor....at my feet...in a clump....bawking at me like crazy. Even the roo was in there clucking (the wuss, he is soooo fired) then I saw it in the nest box all coiled up like it owned the place....and I was like, no way you live, Bubba, cause I know you ate my Pollack! I went and grabbed my machete, my axe, kitchen tongs and a stick of dynamite...(just kidding about the dynamite) So I smished his head against the wall till he was dazed and confused (there's a song in there somewhere) with a square point shovel...trying all the while to chop his head off with the shovel...well God decided that would be too easy (gasp) So I tried to nab him with the tongs. Now folks let me tell ya... that works with tiny bullsnakes and garter snakes...but this dud was just too strong. In the meantime I'm thnking about Lynn (gulp!) and how all you pros woulda had it strung up by now, and here I am jacking around with farghing KITCHEN TONGS! So I just grabbed it under the head, grabbed the axe and chopped. Head came right off. (How come that never happens with chickens?) Then I really didn't know what to do with the dang thing. Meanwhile hens are jumping up and down, cheering and clapping and calling me a hero. They carried me around on their shoulders in the pen until I told them to knock it off it, was too much of a display for a humble chicken owner like myself. I expect a call from the president and the key to the magnificent city of Altus (choke) tomorrow.
