<shrug> whenever seems sensible to them according to their wishes and what their lives are like at different times. Honestly, people have such different ideas about how they want life to go, and do such different things, I don't think you can say more than that.
It is often pretty much out of a person's hands anyhow. People fall unexpectedly pregnant; people turn out to have unexpected difficulties conceiving. To avoid too much disappointment due to the latter it might make sense to start before you're 30 or so (gives you a chance to see if problems develop and then a chance to try to fix them,
fertility and miscarriage rates go more strongly south)... BUT, see previous paragraph.
Also, how much minimum do you believe that a couple can make a year money wise to raise a child.
It takes next to no money to raise a child if you are really committed to raising a child... the only thing I'd stipulate is that you need to either be able to live on one income, or have a family member ready to do all your day care for you. ("Need" is not the right word. But, "it works one big huge heck of a lot better if you..." is probably not too strong a wording)
we do live on one income already, as im a house wife and we do really well with money to spare
It *can* take a bit of money to *birth* a child, especially if complications arise. So, health insurance coverage issues can be big for many people (not here in Canada, but in the States). Not a total obstacle, but something to consider if you are on a shoestring and contemplating trying to get pregnant.
our health insurance is really decient, and having a child wouldnt raise it too much at all just a few bucks actually a paycheck and our insurance just dropped some as well.
But beyond that, the vast majority of all the usual exorbitant "costs" of raising a kid that are quoted in the media these days are just discretionary luxuries. Hand-me-down and thrift-store clothes and toys work GREAT. Few people need to use formula. Cloth diapers are often (not always) cheaper to use, and some people even get by without using diapers at all, almost totally. If you're home with the kids you don't need child care. Canned babyfood is totally unnecessary. There are lots of free activities, they don't need expensive classes etc.
I'm glad you mention this, i plan to breastfeed, which my mom laughs about because I refused to breastfeed for her, however I would use breast pumps then ifi had to i want my baby on my milk. As for buying from thrift stores...that's what I plan to do, as well as hand me downs, heck most of my own clothes are hand-me-downs. I am also interested in cloth diapers. Was just reading today about to just make the baby food instead of buy already made stuff and I am all for that as well. So it's really nice to read about it from someone else as well.
The only two expenses hard to avoid are extra food (even a 2 yr old can sometimes really pack it away! but unless you're already barely getting by on rice and beans, economizing can allow you to compensate) and medical expenses (which will depend largely on your insurance coverage and how much you like to take the kids to the Dr and medicate them... although luck plays a role too)
I think from what we spend a week on groceries and how much $$ we have left over after bills every week that we could easily afford a child now and I need to explain these things to hubby because the only thing stopping him is this huge fear we'll be buying double the groceries that we buy now and I just do not believe that is the case. I make big meals that last us 2-3 days before I need to make another meal, and with me planning to breastfeed (or bottle feed breast milk--if my baby is stubborn like i was haha) and with considering cloth diapers, and buying thrift store baby clothes ---even make my own when I can, I think we'd barely spend that much normally more than we do now I feel. Ofcourse i'm only meaning during infant and toddler stage, after that Im sure the bill will raise but by then hubby will be a driller of his own rig (it's guarrenteed) whe'll be making around $70,000+ a year
Even for food and medical care, where there's a will there's a way, if you are seriously dedicated to being a parent (a good one). If you are happy without much material goods, I'm not sure there's too much of a lower income cutoff.
*smiles* put it this way my husband thinks im weird how much I don't care about buying clothes for myself until I absolutely need them, and I barely ever want anything for myself (other than wanting a child ofcourse) so I believe i'd be a good mother (can't say great because as many of you have said, I can't expect to be supermom without bein a mom first).
The big things I would say about being a parent are:
1) It is
wonderful.
2) Also it is very very HARD. You can no longer do what you want, and have to make sacrifices. Ideally you will feel this is worthwhile overall but that doesn't mean you will not resent it also, sometimes. But
Put it this way, our weekend consists of waking up feeding the animals, grocery shopping, coming home, putting them away, me making dinner, while he watches tv or does yard work. Sunday we hang out around the house, play monopoly (our ritual ha ha), and maybe go fishing down the road....so pretty much the only change may be we wont be able to go fishing anymore...no biggie to me. A fish is nothing compaired to caring for a baby. We're a really at-home type couple.
3) it is THE most important job ever in the whole entire world, if you ask me, so you have to be willing to be serious about it, even when it sucks. FIND the wonderful parts, and do your absolute level best.
I am so prepaired and excited for it, even the pain in the butt times I am being very realistic about andi nkow times i will get frusterated,but the good will out weigh the bad ofcourse
4) There are no perfect parents. Well ok maybe there are but in general most of us are just normal people doing the best we can but with bad days as well as good days. Do not go into it thinking that YOU, almost alone in the whole human race, are going to be a perfect parent. You're not. Deal with it now. That way you can focus on getting better on it, instead of beating yourself up about not being perfect
Good luck,
Pat
