***RANT & VENT***

[Mrs. Glassman]

Great advise all of you, and I thank you for it.

Many of you have hard-nosed advise, which is what I would give to others, because that's the way I was raised. Ferrell animals were put down. Eatting animals were slaughtered to feed the family. Cry-babies were put out in the dark til they cried no longer.

I was brought up hard, and have lived life feeling that it may get harder soon & to be prepared for what may come. i.e. saving money, being able to take responsibility & being able to live off what I have in hand.

He, for some reason never got that. I don't know if it was because our Father was murdered when he was way younger than I, and he doesn't remember much, or what we went through.

I was older. I remember what Daddy taught me.

We come from Irish Dairy/pig/chicken/sugar cane farmers.

I can not get a person who is not humble for what they have, and thankful for it. It is beyond me.

All I can think is "mom" raised him, and he got the short end of the stick on life lessons.

 

[kcfuerst]

I would pack up his belongings and his dog, provide him with a one-way ticket to his choice: the military or school, and drop him off at the corner of a large sized church where he could think about what he wanted to do with the rest of his life.

The fact that his father was murdered has nothing to do with choices he makes for his life.

Hate to sound hard, but sometimes tough love is hard to dish out.

 

[Wolf-Kim]

The military sounds like an excellent suggestion! Straighten him out real quick!

-Kim

 

[Pine Ridge Ranch]

This is really a "no brainer"

Give him the "rulz" and tell him this is "not" choice. If you don't follow my "rulz" you and the dog can hit the road.

Then follow through with your promise.

Sounds to me like things will get back to normal real quick since brother can't or won't follow "rulz" from anyone.

Good luck to you.

 

[Mrs. Glassman]

You don't sound hard, K8tieCat....

That is the same advise I might give.

It is time he does SOMETHING with his life.

For crying-out-loud...we all have to do SOMETHING.

I've worked my rear off to have nice things. Granted, they are not the best things...but they are nice & they are MINE.

I don't flipping get why people don't extend themselves to do BETTER...to HAVE.

Yeah, I know it can't be taken to the grave, but WHAT can??
Only a secret. That is the only thing you can take to the grave worth taking.
(Break forum rules with a bad word here)--IT!

 

[Chickenmaven]

Your anger is really healthy. He offends your values. Gosh, that is core stuff!!!
Let him know that this is not working for you. He should get his a$$ off the couch & walk that dog if it is "all he has."
Don't be afraid to draw a line in the sand. If he is really choosing to disrespect you, the relationship is in bad trouble anyway.

 

[Debi214]

Be the big sister (I know it is really hard sometimes) and tell your brother he has no choice at all and needs to follow your rules or he is outta there - either he will catch on or you will have to make him leave. You might as well offer his dog free to a good home on craigslist or the local newspaper since he won't keep it tied up too.

 

[panner123]

Don't blame the dog or your brother, blame yourself. Don't shoot the dog, train it, but PLEASE shout your brother. Put him out on his backside, it is time he learned. If he is using drugs, what you and your hubby have worked hard for will be in the pawn shop.

I see this daily, my brother in law (now clean for 6 years) works with drug users. He has to help the families trying to help a family member. Only 1 in 135 stop using. He is one of the 135, only because he got some bad herion that killed his wife and caused him to lose part of his arm. I tried many times to help him only to have to buy my tools back from the pawn shop.

The 6 years does not make up for the 38 years of using. But he is trying.

 

[LesGan]

To know you have done all you can do to help him how about drawing up a contract of rules of the house. Address everything from rent, chores, dog rules, no drugs, etc. If he is to continue to live there he must sign the contract and then abide by it. We know how it will probably turn out BUT it puts the responsibility back where it belongs....on HIS shoulders. It will be much easier to say hey, you signed this contract and you broke it so out you go. Of course it would be nice if he lives up to his end of the bargin. You don't want to be an enabler for his bad habits. Move yourself up higher up on that priority list. Stand strong.

 

[CoonX]

<<< Dirty deeds done dirt cheap.

Won't have to worry about brother or the dog.


Don't know if you have kids, if so, Uncle can show them how to freebase or to make a crack pipe.

Also, he's living with you, cops come and search your premises, guess who all is going to jail.
Guess whose house might get confiscated as a drug house.