Slander and Libel....update and ending on post 77.

[Camelot Farms]

Sonoran...I thought about those things also. I had this visual of ex-step MIL sitting in my former clients home on her 1st!!, yes 1st meeting with her and making small talk, doing the whole 'small world thing' to build a relationship/report etc and finding out that they both know me and then bashing me. How unprofessional is that? I just cant even fathom how anyone, no matter how dysfunctional they are, thinking that it would be appropriate subject matter. My client said that she was just stunned as all of this poured forth out of the MIL's mouth.

And, having been there when she has gone after one of the other SIL's or BIL's, I so know how she does it. She literally doesnt take a breath, just starts spewing like a fountain.

So, back to the topic...lol...I am trying to figure out how to go about stopping her from at least spewing this crud at work. That would at least keep her away from many of the families that I used to work with that she may come into contact with. Its a very small community and while she doesnt work for the same program that I did, many of the families will cross into the program that hired her.

My damage control was to call a couple of old colleagues and let them know without details that my name seemed to be cropping up attached to some very ugly rumors and if they would just keep their ears open for opportunities to shut down any such rumors, it would be appreciated. In a small community, most human service workers know all of the rest and end up at the same meetings now and then so I feel confident that I have at least put an extinguisher in the hands of folks who will put out fires if they erupt.


DH is madder today than yesterday so now I am the one calming him down...lol.
What a mess! And at the age of 40, I thought that I was all done with the high school drama crud. Egads!

 

[Anianna]

This can cause your family real HARM.

The boat is already rocked, imo. I'm not one for pursuing legal routes generally, but these are the kinds of statements that can get your family in trouble and end up traumatizing your daughter. I tell you this from personal experience. When I was 8, I lived alone with my dad after my mom had died and a neighbor started telling lies about my father being a drunk and leaving me home for weeks at a time while he was away on trips. None of it was true, but we had social services breathing down our necks for years and once they latch onto a tip, they don't like to let it go easily whether it is valid or not. Now, I have a very unhealthy dislike and distrust for an agency that is supposed to help kids, but only ever harassed and caused trouble for my family, so much so that my father sent me away to live with relatives and that was the only thing that took their focus off of us. I believe they were on the verge of trying to take me away from my dad, but he tried to keep me out of the loop as much as he could and I don't really know that for sure. It was a truly horrible experience in my life all because some big mouth *bleep* decided to spread some lies.

If I were you, I would call a lawyer and see if anything can be done before it snowballs into a real problem for your family.

I also agree with Sonoran Silkies that the organization she is working or volunteering for could get in trouble for her behavior and it may be a good idea to notify them, particularly if it is likely that she comes in contact with more of your past clients. I would probably check with the lawyer on how best to approach that, though.

 

[Camelot Farms]

A cut and paste of the letter that I devised:

Please find enclosed New York State’s law and regulations pertaining to slander. If you are unable to interpret them,
I would suggest you contact an attorney and have them explained to you.

I have contacted an attorney in the area and should there be further breach of the law as it relates to slander and defamation of character,
she will immediately commence filing suit against both you and your current employer.

This letter also constitutes notice that any further contact from you to either me or my minor children will be considered harassment and
charges will be filed. This is to include all communication including third party contact.

Thank you for your appreciation of the seriousness of this matter.

 

[MaggieRae]

Wow.

 

[redhen]

Quote:
Good job!!

 

[Boyd]

Quote:
I just printed out the definition of Slander and Libel and the NY laws pertaining to them. I will be putting them in the mail to her tomorrow. No note, no letter, nothing for her to sink her teeth into.
Maybe for fun I wont even mail them from here.

ooooH! Maybe I could send them to a BYCer in EVERY state and you all could just pop them in the mail from your zipcode.

Wouldnt that just blow her mind?

Bahh hhha haaa.

Seriously... any takers?

I'd love to help!! Gimme a PM and I'll give ya my addy!

 

[Boyd]

Quote:
better yet, get her on the "Services" portion of CL.....

 

[thaiturkey]

Quote:
If that is addressed to your ex MIL then I think you should send a copy to her employers with a cautiously worded covering letter. If you don't do that and the bad stuff hits the fan they will say that you gave them no chance to correct the problem. Also, the culprit, seeing that you have not alerted her employer, may get in first with a story that favours her. If you intend to act, then you have engaged her in battle and you have to fight. Your description of her actions suggests that she may have a sociopathic disorder and that might mean she is lacking in boundaries when it comes to attacking someone or, in her view, defending herself.

A friend of mine, a retired Royal Navy Petty Officer, once said that if you intend to hit someone, make sure he can't get up. That might be good advice in your case. Don't play with her, have her shut up for good.

Good luck. I think that we should all be prepared to stand up to people like her.

 

[Camelot Farms]

Thai... got it covered

Her employer is the __ State Dept of Education in an Adult Services type program, helping people get thier GED's etc. I sent a very cautiously worded letter to the regional supervisor. She may have covered her 'you know what' with her direct supervisor, but when the letter hits the Regional Director, she is so busted. And the fact that some BYCers tax dollars pay this woman's salary is a sad fact.

It was very cautious and non threatening letter. More of a head up that one of their employee's is acting in an unprofessional manner (and committing a crime) while working on their timeclock as well as letting them know that they arent dealing with a dummy. As my kids would say 'I got it goin' on'. lol

Thanks Thai for the very good tips and advice!

 

[Germaine_11.20]

If your client is willing to testify in court, would they also be willing to sign a paper stating what happened and then have it notorized? Send it to her employer along with a copy of the letter you are sending to the slandering crazyperson.
Let them know the type of person they have employed and how she is representing their company. Get her fired.
Someone like that doesn't belong in a position she is in and likely will keep doing and saying things like that until it hurts her in some fashion. They get enjoyment out of doing and saying and hurting other people.

Geebs, you're a crack up!