teenagers

[deb1]

Wow! I feel so blessed reading this thread. I have four kids ages 19, 16, 12 and 9. Thus far I have not have any problems with disrespect.

I am not saying that my kids are angels, far from it. We've had some issues with my oldest son not quite knowing what he wanted to do with himself. But compared to a lot of kids, he isn't that bad.

I wish that I had advise for some of you but you probably did all the things that I have done with my kids.

 

[wegotchickens]

Quote:
LOL! My sister took my nephew's door off the hinges. Said that she had taken everything else away. The only thing left was his privacy! It worked after about 6 weeks. The nonchalance/attitude could only last so long.

I've considered this. I surely have.

 

[deb1]

Quote:
I use work as punishment sometimes. It is wonderful. You kids can clean out the fridge, scrub the toilets, weed the yard, etc. They hate, hate, hate such jobs and it works wonderful.

 

[Reinbeau]

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My eldest tried the social services garbage with me once, when he was 15 - he dropped the 'F' bomb on me, and I slapped him right across the face. He yelled "I'm going to call DSS on you!" and I told him to go right ahead, they had a nice foster home waiting for him over in Brockton, I'd go upstairs and pack his bags. You should have seen the look on his face, it was priceless. I said that's right, I won't be going anywhere, but you sure would be, and he backed right down.

It was tough, my marriage was crumbling, the father was violent over the kids, I didn't tell him much, so I was on my own with a 15 and 11 year old to raise. I've said many times, tie a knot at the end of your rope and hang on, because you can't let go, if you do, they win, but they ultimately lose. Stand tough, don't take their garbage, be strict but fair, and things will work out - those 11 and 15 year olds are now 24 and 28 and pretty wonderful young men.

 

[FarmerDenise]

iread, that's what I wanted to do to my stepson's room. But by now the stuff in his room has fermented so badly, that we can smell when he opens the door.
We have the same problem as beak's friend. A looser mother, who uses her kids to get what she wants, mostly money for drugs and alcohol. My stepson was a wonderfull little boy, very loving, smart, well mannered etc.
When he was 11, his mother kidnapped him and moved all around the state as well as out of state. He missed most of 5th grade, because she didn't always bother to put him in school. When his father got him back a year later, his son was a belligerent obnoxious, moody kid. The closeness we had prior as a family was gone.
Dad is now afraid his son will run away (possibly to mom), if he disciplines him. The kid gets away with murder (practically). He lies, steals, cheats, knows it all, etc...
There is still goodness in him, but I'm waiting to see more of it.
I raised a daughter, who is now 28. She learned early on, that actions have consequences and priviledges need to be earned.

 

[wegotchickens]

Quote:
I use work as punishment sometimes. It is wonderful. You kids can clean out the fridge, scrub the toilets, weed the yard, etc. They hate, hate, hate such jobs and it works wonderful.

My kids already do most of those as regular weekly chores.
And she already does her own laundry (since we didn't do it 'right').

She doesn't care about learning to drive.
She sees no job she wants to have.
She has some genuine health-related issues going on, but plays them up when things are seriously not going her way.
And when she bats her baby-blues at her dad he usually caves and plays me off as the bad guy...

 

[deb1]

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Have you considered taking him to a therapists? There is no telling what type of abuse he might have endured from his mother or one of her friends.

 

[Kesta]

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my parents prob wanna kill me or maybe even eat me but that my child is called cannabalism

 

[dave_Cash69]

im a teen. haha
i think im a pretty good kid, though.

 

[FrenchHen]

Anyone remember the Cosby show episode where they cleared Theo's room, gave him $1000 to start off with, and basically set up "real life" for him in response to his attitude?