The Front Porch Swing

[bruceha2000]

She's not getting child support, she was supposed to pay Justin (per the original divorce decree, the one she got tossed out because it was totally not her fault that she didn't show up). It said for her to pay $252 a month. The "joint custody" part was put in the papers to appease her, I'm not even sure how exactly it's worded... but she doesn't have much "power" so to speak. She never talks to teachers, doctors or counselors (even though she's welcome to). She only gets him from 9am Saturday until 5pm Sunday. Never participates in school functions, even though I've invited her before.

They're having a hearing soon to look at child support, because that did not get decided yet for the new divorce decree. They got custody and the divorce out of the way, agreeing that the child support hearing would be done later. Later was SUPPOSED to be past September, but that's been the story of the whole thing... every hearing seems to take half a year to be scheduled.

The kiddo has a guardian ad litem to watch out for his best interests. He already had to put his foot down once when she said if she got custody she wouldn't make Justin pay child support. That's not something she can do, as it's not her money, it's the kid's money. It's for HIS support, not hers or ours. Besides, the judge wasn't going to let her have custody anyway, but she's freaking dilusional

She told Justin she would have the court "fix" our taxes and have it that she can claim the kid as her dependent for 2012 or 2013 and make us pay the child credit to her.. He didn't live with her at all... I don't think it quite works like that.



Yesterday she said she's been driving around all day to have power and cable hooked up to her new place.. So I guess they moved again? Who knows, she never gives us the address to wherever she's staying.

She also got the kid a cell phone for Christmas. He's 6. Justin had told her no, but hey, who cares what he says, right? I'm afraid this'll be one of those things that'll lead to tension. I just see it now, all of a sudden all of the family will have that number and the kid will be getting calls at all hours from people he's not supposed to be around.

His grandpa tried to kidnap him once already.

Hoping I'm worried for nothing.

The woman is clearly mentally unstable.
Yes, court takes a looooong time. Even longer when she doesn't show and they have to reschedule.
With regard to the phone, can Justin convince his son to leave it turned off? No 6 year old needs a phone. I'm sure it will be an "issue" on or off. If it isn't on when his Mom calls, she'll rail but that might still be better than abusive calls.

Tomtommom, I feel for yu and the stress this causes your family. Tuesday I testified for a friend and her son against her Extreamly abusive ex husband. He gets an agreement signed, then takes her back to court. He now useing the court system to abuse her. I witnessed him screaming horrible things about my friend to her son, I've witnessed him abusing her... he's horrible. I took three different dates off and court kept being postponed last minute. I closed my business three time! Anyways, finally court happened. It was supposed to be a two day trial.... it was five days! He lied on the stand, but my friend recorded and saved everything! They played 36 messages and drop off recordings (drop offs were all in front of the child). When I testified, I was told that probably only my friends lawyer would ask me anything, but my friend warned me her ex's lawyer has no client control. If the client wants him to ask something he will, even if it makes them look bad. Well her ex was livid when he saw me! He started to scribble on his pad. His lawyer tried to twist every thing I said and testify for me. I saw exactly what was happening. So just sat there super calm and just would say, no that is not what I said... I said (and repeat calmly what I had just said). The lawyer kept saying I was just mad at his client and I just don't like him... Blah blah. He was pretty desperate to get me mad, but it wasn't going to happen and I was expecting it. The judge, thank god, ruled in my friends favor! She said his lawyer at the end tried to discredit me and her other witnesses and the judge said no, he thought we were all great, but that her ex husband was a horrible witness. I have already warned my neighbors that I testified against a very abuive person, so they said they will keep an eye out. It's so stressful when it's your friend, I can't imagine going through it, but atleast your son only has to see her for a bit. It's sad but for the best. My friends kid. It's so horrible. It's so hard to hear a little kid say these horrible things that are just evil and a parent told them.

That is how trial lawyers work. Word the questions so you almost have no choice but to answer in their favor. Personal experience
To me from self representing lawyer:
"Do you recall telling us ....?"
I answered "No"
Then he asked "You don't remember telling us ...?"
I answered more fully: "We didn't tell you ... we told you .....".

I'm glad he re-asked the question trying to make it look like I didn't remember the (IMPLIED) facts that he hoped to stick in the judge's mind as REAL facts and that my not remembering would also cast doubt on answers to other questions.

I'm reminded of the joke:
"Yes or no - have you stopped beating your wife?" You lose either way - Yes means you used to beat her, No means you still do.

I wish the lawyers had to ask questions while attached to a lie detector.

Cute pics!

Sad news over here. Someone close to my husband got murdered yesterday.. for $20. An old co-worker from his Domino's days, out on a delivery. Delivery was a setup for robbery... He's very distraught about the whole thing. Domino's internal charity says they'll take care of the family, so that's a small blessing.. but man... things are rough out there lately. Seems to be getting worse and worse.

http://www.al.com/news/birmingham/i..._pizza_deliverymans_ameri.html#incart_m-rpt-2

Oh Sietske that is SO horrible. Wrong time, wrong place.

Then here is my son and my niece walking down the street. They are so cute. We played at the park and then took them to ice cream. My niece was super excited. I got them matching shirts for Christmas. You can't tell in the picture. They both put them right on. They were different colors but the same design. I was so glad my niece liked her shirt. Girls can be so hard to buy for.

I really love that picture, making it B&W just adds to the "artistic" feel.

 

[Blooie]

Kendra - yes, little Kendra who is just now beginning to talk a little bit - is going to sing you a little song she just learned! For those of you who don't know, Kendra is our 3 year old granddaughter. She was born with Spina Bifida. She's a little delayed because of her hydrocephalus and seizures, but she's finally starting to learn to talk. She can pull herself up to stand and can walk if we hold her hands and let her lean against us. She'll cruise along the couch and likes to sit on her knees and play with her toys. Her main way to get around is in her wheelchair, which she has been in since she was 9 months old. And she's a cutie pie! So anyway -

There's a story behind this little song...hey, I'm Blooie, isn't there always a story? When Katie was about 2 I had to wait for prescription at the drug store, so to keep her occupied I took her over to the little display of Christmas stuffed toys. You know, those extremely annoying ones that sing and wiggle when you push the button? Well, she wasn't really impressed with most of them, until I pushed the button on a little bear dressed in red and white. It started dancing and singing "Santa Baby." Katie burst out laughing, and I mean that from her tootsie-toes laughing - she laughed so hard that we suddenly found a crowd around us laughing right along with her. Well, of course I bought the silly thing, even though I've always thought that song was tacky.

Every Christmas from then on, the first thing Katiebug always wanted to find among the Christmas decorations was the Santa Baby Bear. She'd push the button and sing as loud as she could. She loves that silly thing. She just turned 9 and she still looks for it. This year she found it sitting in its usual spot right next to the fireplace and hit the button. She played it and sang along with it once, then she was (mercifully) done. Kendra has never paid any attention to it........

....until this year! She was over so I could babysit while Mom was at work, and she found Santa Baby. She pushed the button - over and over and over and....well, you get the picture. I was just getting ready to go in and get her involved in something else when Ken said, "She's singing with it." Instead of grabbing a different toy, I grabbed the camera. You can hear Ken saying, "That's really cool", or "that's so cool" - he was as amazed as I was. Now, if you're expecting to hear her sing every word clearly, you won't. She's still doing that thing that we all do when we know part of a song but not every word - kinda sing what we think we're hearing. But this is amazing to me! The song is tacky but it's the best Christmas gift I ever got!

 

[Tomtommom]

Kendra - yes, little Kendra who is just now beginning to talk a little bit - is going to sing you a little song she just learned! For those of you who don't know, Kendra is our 3 year old granddaughter. She was born with Spina Bifida. She's a little delayed because of her hydrocephalus and seizures, but she's finally starting to learn to talk. She can pull herself up to stand and can walk if we hold her hands and let her lean against us. She'll cruise along the couch and likes to sit on her knees and play with her toys. Her main way to get around is in her wheelchair, which she has been in since she was 9 months old. And she's a cutie pie! So anyway -

There's a story behind this little song...hey, I'm Blooie, isn't there always a story? When Katie was about 2 I had to wait for prescription at the drug store, so to keep her occupied I took her over to the little display of Christmas stuffed toys. You know, those extremely annoying ones that sing and wiggle when you push the button? Well, she wasn't really impressed with most of them, until I pushed the button on a little bear dressed in red and white. It started dancing and singing "Santa Baby." Katie burst out laughing, and I mean that from her tootsie-toes laughing - she laughed so hard that we suddenly found a crowd around us laughing right along with her. Well, of course I bought the silly thing, even though I've always thought that song was tacky.

Every Christmas from then on, the first thing Katiebug always wanted to find among the Christmas decorations was the Santa Baby Bear. She'd push the button and sing as loud as she could. She loves that silly thing. She just turned 9 and she still looks for it. This year she found it sitting in its usual spot right next to the fireplace and hit the button. She played it and sang along with it once, then she was (mercifully) done. Kendra has never paid any attention to it........

....until this year! She was over so I could babysit while Mom was at work, and she found Santa Baby. She pushed the button - over and over and over and....well, you get the picture. I was just getting ready to go in and get her involved in something else when Ken said, "She's singing with it." Instead of grabbing a different toy, I grabbed the camera. You can hear Ken saying, "That's really cool", or "that's so cool" - he was as amazed as I was. Now, if you're expecting to hear her sing every word clearly, you won't. She's still doing that thing that we all do when we know part of a song but not every word - kinda sing what we think we're hearing. But this is amazing to me! The song is tacky but it's the best Christmas gift I ever got!

Thomas sings like that too. Aren't they just so precious? He LOVES songs.. and music. He gets really into it. He loves dancing and singing decorations like that. We have one that sings "we wish you a merry christmas" and one that sings "jingle, jingle, jingle". Oh those things make him so happy. We had a tacky, TACKY one that sang "santa baby" but I had to get rid of it, just too creepy.

Here it is

HOw tacky is that?

 

[Blooie]

Oh, my, TT - that IS tackier than the one I'm stuck with!

Like Thomas, I think that music is one of the keys for Kendra. She can sing the ABC's and because of that she's now recognizing letters on sight, even if they are out of order. Little milestones are sometimes bigger than the major things, don't you think?

 

[Tomtommom]

Thomas watched your video and was singing with Kendra

We're doing Christmas today so Johnathan can have Christmas at his mom's tomorrow.










Thomas doesn't like unwrapping gifts. He was trying to put it back on when we ripped a piece for him

Johnathan is ofcourse super excited. Loving all his new things.

They all got new books, and some games and crafts. Nothing too crazy this year. Thomas is madly in love with his Toy Story toys.

 

[lazy gardener]

TTM, so very sorry to hear about your hubby's friend. It is truly a sick world we live in, and unfortunately, it ain't getting any better. My greatest condolences.

 

[tntchix]

@Blooie I am now sitting here in a puddle of happy tears. What a sweet moment. Thank you for sharing.

 

[Blooie]

Great pics, TT! So glad that Thomas enjoyed Kendra's performance! The kids look like Christmas was all it should be for them. Made me smile!

Tnt, you wuzn't supposed to cry any kinda tears - you wuz supposed to smile! But I do know what you're saying, and thanks! We're all so proud of her progress. She has rapidly become the heartbeat of the family - we're supposed to be teaching her stuff but it's been more the other way around....we learn more from her than she'll ever learn from us.

Merry Christmas, everyone, from Oleo Acres!

 

[tntchix]

Great pics, TT! So glad that Thomas enjoyed Kendra's performance! The kids look like Christmas was all it should be for them. Made me smile!

Tnt, you wuzn't supposed to cry any kinda tears - you wuz supposed to smile! But I do know what you're saying, and thanks! We're all so proud of her progress. She has rapidly become the heartbeat of the family - we're supposed to be teaching her stuff but it's been more the other way around....we learn more from her than she'll ever learn from us.

Merry Christmas, everyone, from Oleo Acres!

Tears are my smiley face, always have been.
Isn't it amazing how a child can show us the way?
Give those babies big hugs from me for Christmas.

 

[Alice28]

Blooie, that video of Kendra is so adorable! Haha! She's doing great! Tomtommom, I love that pictures and that you did Christmas a day early so the whole family could be there. I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas! I got up this morning, went to the grocery store (the fridge was bare because we had been out of town) mopped and vacuumed and ran a load of dishes before nine and made my husband and son breakfast. Now just finishing laundry before bed so we have nothing to get done on Christmas.

My husband, while I ran around cleaning, told me "I need to go do my Christmas shopping at some point today". The only person he gets anything for is me. I guess he's a master procrastinator! Lol. Cracked me up! My son wanted to go with him, so I got some time to myself to fold laundry with out help. I'm excited for a family day tomorrow. You all have fun.