Okay, I have approximately 9.7 million of those things in my yard. You are welcome to them all. Think of the adorable stocking stuffers they will make! Christmas is right around the corner you know.
I hate the little things. One of these days I'm going to crack an ankle from stepping on one of their stupid holes. They prefer to dig around the chicken coops these days making my paths all muddy and soft. (In the spring the chickens catch the babies and play chicken rugby with them. ICK.)
Problem #2 with the wretched little buggers is that my dogs HAVE to dig them up. It is apparently a Dog Law. They have completely trenched the backyard. Mowing the grass has become an off road event since I can't ever see the holes and pits when the grass gets high. So if I don't break an ankle I'm going to crack a rib being thrown over the steering wheel on the lawn mower.
Problem #3 is that one of the dogs thinks they are really fabulous squeaky toys and she tries to bring them in the house. Grown moles are NOT cute and fuzzy. They are icky and ooky, especially after the dog has slobbered all over them.
I turn into psycho woman screaming "Drop it, drop it, DROP IT!" as the gleeful dog hurtles through the doggie door into my kitchen with a mangled mole in her mouth. Again I say,
So in conclusion, you can have them all. Please PM me your address and I will start boxing up the little suckers. I'll even throw in the shipping for free! All for you!!!