Things you wish you could say

[tripletfeb]

It's abnormally warm for this time of year. You are burning So. Much. Wood. now. What will you do when you have used up your wood pile and your parents' woodpile and the temperatures are back to "normal," ie 30 degrees colder?

Please, please do not ask if you can buy wood from us. The answer will be no. We cannot supply you with wood, we will not do the work (fell, cut to length, haul) for you for any price.

Your neighbors still have their fire going? Good Lord, that's nuts. It must be 90° in their home

 

[Sally PB]

Your neighbors still have their fire going? Good Lord, that's nuts. It must be 90° in their home

They have an exterior wood burner. He has said that it keeps their entire house (probably 2x+ the SF of ours) at 75. It also heats their water, so unlimited hot water.

We have our wood stove going, and the temp in here ranges from about 71 (now; fire's been out for several hours) to 80 in the room where the wood stove is when it's been burning for a few hours.

Our houses were built by the same idiot guy about 43 years ago. Replacing our windows with new, efficient ones would probably cut our heat loss a LOT. Same for them, I bet. But we're looking at $10K, probably. Not in this year's budget.

 

[Kay-T-Hammer]

Yea that one is hard - I now, never expect anything from anyone.

Wish I could be cheeky enough to say “you never help me with anything why should I help you”.

That is how I ended up on half of my family's list. And I plan to be on a few more of their lists if they cannot learn how to be adults and do crap all on their own. No, sugar pie, you sure as do not need me to hold your hand during a phone call. I have crap that I need to get done, so pull up your big girl panties and go do your thing.
"What if they do not speak English!?" "Well, you are dialing an American landline, so if they answer and do not speak English, then, and only then, you can throw the phone to me and I will blow off a lot of steam screaming in one of 12 different languages. Pick which one you want me to use before you make the call though or all I will scream is Gobbledegook, and it will all be about pork pie hats."
I am cheeky. It is good being cheeky.

 

[member 655102]

It's abnormally warm for this time of year. You are burning So. Much. Wood. now. What will you do when you have used up your wood pile and your parents' woodpile and the temperatures are back to "normal," ie 30 degrees colder?

Please, please do not ask if you can buy wood from us. The answer will be no. We cannot supply you with wood, we will not do the work (fell, cut to length, haul) for you for any price.

I second that motion and by all means…Let them figure it out for themselves.

The weather is always changing these days, as are people.

 

[member 655102]

That is how I ended up on half of my family's list. And I plan to be on a few more of their lists if they cannot learn how to be adults and do crap all on their own. No, sugar pie, you sure as do not need me to hold your hand during a phone call. I have crap that I need to get done, so pull up your big girl panties and go do your thing.
"What if they do not speak English!?" "Well, you are dialing an American landline, so if they answer and do not speak English, then, and only then, you can throw the phone to me and I will blow off a lot of steam screaming in one of 12 different languages. Pick which one you want me to use before you make the call though or all I will scream is Gobbledegook, and it will all be about pork pie hats."
I am cheeky. It is good being cheeky.

It doesn’t matter how many languages you speak. What really matters is how much time and effort you put into things and how much you are willing to sacrifice.

For instance…Don’t treat people like shit unless you expect to be treated the same way. Tit for tat, ya know…

 

[Kay-T-Hammer]

It doesn’t matter how many languages you speak. What really matters is how much time and effort you put into things and how much you are willing to sacrifice.

For instance…Don’t treat people like shit unless you expect to be treated the same way. Tit for tat, ya know…

So, you are suggesting treating others as I wish to be treated? Hm. No. I have spent enough time doing that, and all it earned me was the position of doormat. Now, I treat others as they deserve to be treated. Treat people around you like garbage but be kind to me? I treat you like garbage. Treat others with kindness and show me disdain, and I treat you with kindness. Show your worth, and that alone will get me to show you any form of decency. It is becoming more rare by the day that I find someone worth being kind to.

 

[Ponypoor]

So, you are suggesting treating others as I wish to be treated? Hm. No. I have spent enough time doing that, and all it earned me was the position of doormat. Now, I treat others as they deserve to be treated. Treat people around you like garbage but be kind to me? I treat you like garbage. Treat others with kindness and show me disdain, and I treat you with kindness. Show your worth, and that alone will get me to show you any form of decency. It is becoming more rare by the day that I find someone worth being kind to.

I just remove myself from anyone who doesn’t reciprocate my help and assistance - I pay for help. If anyone wants my help and assistance I first ask them, ‘oh hello, sure I can help - but first can you drop by and help me with my task? Once that’s done I will be freed up to help you’.

If they say no then I politely decline helping them stating ‘sorry but I would love to help but I am just swamped for time, let me know if you can help me and then I will have some time freed up’.

People will soon figure out that you are not a ‘doormat’.

I wish you luck and I hope that you find some balance in your life

 

[Kay-T-Hammer]

I just remove myself from anyone who doesn’t reciprocate my help and assistance - I pay for help. If anyone wants my help and assistance I first ask them, ‘oh hello, sure I can help - but first can you drop by and help me with my task? Once that’s done I will be freed up to help you’.

If they say no then I politely decline helping them stating ‘sorry but I would love to help but I am just swamped for time, let me know if you can help me and then I will have some time freed up’.

People will soon figure out that you are not a ‘doormat’.

I wish you luck and I hope that you find some balance in your life

That is a very dignified way of saying what tumbles out of my mouth these days.

I drop everything to help if the help is necessary. Like, I have offered to watch my nephew while his parents have a day full of seeing doctors; even though they have been flaking on me, it is something that they really need help with. So I will do it and change my plans to accommodate. But things that a normal person should not need help with? Nah. I am all set with that.

I remember when I used to have balance. I lost my footing, fell, and no one has helped me to get back up. I spent too long lying on the floor with my hand out and calling for help, and it all fell on deaf ears. So I shall continue lying on the floor, working to get myself back on my feet. I have withdrawn my hand. I will need it to help myself. (Though I am also a petty little person, so I also use that hand to trip others whenever they try to pass me.) I am a complex person. I will help you, but I am also going to drag you down, too. Maybe I am trying to use them as leverage to help hoist myself up. I do not know anymore. I cannot even tell if I drag them down on purpose, or if it really is just a byproduct of my trying to get back to where I used to be.

I miss being happy.

 

[tripletfeb]

So, you are suggesting treating others as I wish to be treated? Hm. No. I have spent enough time doing that, and all it earned me was the position of doormat. Now, I treat others as they deserve to be treated. Treat people around you like garbage but be kind to me? I treat you like garbage. Treat others with kindness and show me disdain, and I treat you with kindness. Show your worth, and that alone will get me to show you any form of decency. It is becoming more rare by the day that I find someone worth being kind to.

Treating others as you wish to be treated is The Golden Rule. A rule everyone should try to live by

I just remove myself from anyone who doesn’t reciprocate my help and assistance - I pay for help. If anyone wants my help and assistance I first ask them, ‘oh hello, sure I can help - but first can you drop by and help me with my task? Once that’s done I will be freed up to help you’.

If they say no then I politely decline helping them stating ‘sorry but I would love to help but I am just swamped for time, let me know if you can help me and then I will have some time freed up’.

People will soon figure out that you are not a ‘doormat’.

I wish you luck and I hope that you find some balance in your life

So wait, you don't help others until they help you? What if whatever they need help with is more "important"(for lack of a better word) than what you need help with? And what if they had that same attitude, of not helping you until you help them? Helping someone out, reasonably, when they ask is just the nice thing to do. And believe me, triple threat is not a doormat. But I do try to be nice and helpful. Doesn't hurt me one bit and might just make someone else's day a little bit better

 

[Kay-T-Hammer]

Treating others as you wish to be treated is The Golden Rule. A rule everyone should try to live by

So wait, you don't help others until they help you? What if whatever they need help with is more "important"(for lack of a better word) than what you need help with? And what if they had that same attitude, of not helping you until you help them? Helping someone out, reasonably, when they ask is just the nice thing to do. And believe me, triple threat is not a doormat. But I do try to be nice and helpful. Doesn't hurt me one bit and might just make someone else's day a little bit better

I think I am responding with very specific situations in mind. I do not go around acting like the Grinch, I promise.

I am actually very serene right now. I got my break early because I am actually keeping pace with the kitchen today! I am not 3 sinks-full behind!