What would you do if you were President?

I would withdraw all troops and let those silly terrorists shoot each other full of holes. I would impose a flat spending tax. Everything would be taxed on a flat rate. Nobody would be eliminated. Whatever you purchase, you pay a flat tax on. No loopholes - no need for the IRS. All manufacturing that has been exported would be returned to US soil. We'd stop relying on imported inferior Chinese merchandise that lines the shelves of our American stores. We'd would manufacture American - we would buy American - we would restore the order from within.

No more government bailouts - ever. All businesses would be forced to manage properly or fold. End of story. Just like me. I cannot spend more than I make. The government should learn to impose and live by the same rules they expect me to balance my budget on - so far, I have not gotten a bailout to enjoy my resort spa treatment... still waiting....

Term Limits? Oh yeah, baby! And those stinking politicians would not have their hands in the cookie jars doling out how many cookies they can have while telling us there aren't any left - flat salaries - no endorsements - no book or movie deals.

And by golly, I would make darn sure freedom of religion was protected and endorsed.

And one last thing... the board of education would be put back in action - you screw up in class, go to the principal's office, bend over, grab your ankles and take your punishment!
 
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How silly am I? Get a REAL dog and then build the Taj Mahal of coops!! Air conditioning, heaters, automatic feeder that last a month, automatic poop cleaners, fresh nests every day.... Yup. That's the ticket!
 
I think I would start my "Going Green" program by first stating that every lawn owner must have two chickens...unless of course they are allergic. That would save gas by not transporting eggs everywhere and chickens make great pets.
 
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And legalize chickens in the city 1
 

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