My first ex-husband, on Valentine's Day, gave me a card in Spanish, and a crushed box of candy, because it was the only card left at K-Mart and he found the candy hidden in the men's underwear section. He even told me that because he thought he got so lucky to find it. He also used to give me gold and diamonds, I don't wear gold, and I hate diamonds, I think they are cold, unfeeling stones with no warmth.
My second ex-husband gave me a box of chocolates that were filled with walnuts and coconut, both of which I'm allergic to.
Also I have a phobia: Chronomentrophobia- Fear of clocks, I don't wear watches, I don't have clocks where I can see them, I even have the time covered by tape in the corner of my monitor. My ex husband gave me 4 expensive watches while we were married and one for Christmas after we were divorced!
For a gag birthday gift my brother gave me a giant wooden aspirin that said For Birth Control: Keep Between Knees. I had gone to his house to tell him I was pregnant with Steven.
My cousin in Houston sent me His and Hers matching ID bracelets, the month after my divorce was final.
Right after I got married the second time, my best friend in Las Vegas sent my husband and I a ceramic photo frame, with my name and the name of the guy I dated BEFORE I married my ex.
I get so lucky in the gift arena.