when did parents stop parenting their children??

[AngieChick]

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Umm, that was me as a teen. We didn't play it on a corner, only on a very long stretch of straight road. You could see oncoming traffic for miles. But, it was still dumb. We used to ride on the top of cars ("surfing"), tp friends' houses, etc. We were never rude to adults, and were actually pretty good kids (A students, etc.), but we were really really dumb at times. My parents were not responsible for me leaving my brain at home, they were excellent parents.

Teens sometimes have big grown up bodies and very small brains. In their defense, there is a very real cause: their pre-frontal cortex is not fully developed. That is the area of the brain associated with decision making and seeing long term consequences. Of course everyone is different, but it's important to remember that they aren't just miniature adults.

Like Debi, I swore off the hooligan lifestyle long ago. It's exhausting and I am just too old to tp someone's house at 1am

 

[geebs]

Rufus I just have to say.... You are DANG funny... I am picking myself up off the floor...

As a youngster We went "doorslamming and chinese fire drilling" Disturbing sleep was all I could muster w/o too much guilt.

Door slamming requires a four door car and and four ppl at least... you slam the doors loudly in unison in rural nieghborhoods to wake ppl...

chinese fire drill.. also required lots of doors and everone stopped at the red lights and traded clothes.... The only damage we did was to ppls eyes and some loss of sleep... (a few nuerotic dogs after that)

P.S. I got my share of whoopins... (wasn't really deservin of most of em).... My folks would give "sample whoopins".. Those were a few good whacks to show you a sample of what to expect if you "didn't tow the line" at a particular event.... The sampler was always enough for me.

 

[Cetawin]

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Not 'brushed off' so much a getting things 'in perspective'. The OP described an incident which involved something so innocuous hitting her car that there was no damage and suggested that the kid had bad parents. I say that's a conclusion beyond what's reasonable based on the facts given.

"involved something so innocuous hitting her car that there was no damage and suggested that the kid had bad parents."

It matters not that damage was not caused...it could have been easily enough or worse it could have scared the driver into a fear response and causing a collision. Things such as that are not to be taken lightly. And yes you can look to the parents somewhat because the child should worry more about what her parents will do to her for the behavior rather than lying about doing. She should be worried about the reprecussions from her actions and the punishment to follow, clearly she is not....whose fault is that primarily?

 

[thaiturkey]

Quote:
Not 'brushed off' so much a getting things 'in perspective'. The OP described an incident which involved something so innocuous hitting her car that there was no damage and suggested that the kid had bad parents. I say that's a conclusion beyond what's reasonable based on the facts given.

"involved something so innocuous hitting her car that there was no damage and suggested that the kid had bad parents."

It matters not that damage was not caused...it could have been easily enough or worse it could have scared the driver into a fear response and causing a collision. Things such as that are not to be taken lightly. And yes you can look to the parents somewhat because the child should worry more about what her parents will do to her for the behavior rather than lying about doing. She should be worried about the reprecussions from her actions and the punishment to follow, clearly she is not....whose fault is that primarily?

It's not what 'could have easily happened' but what actually happened. What actually happened is nothing in the way of damage and the not unusual response of an adolescent to deny guilt. Why the kid did it we don't know but kids have always done stupid things and probably always will.

The OP used this example to ask when parents stopped parenting their children. I don't see the link between what that kid did and that all encompassing question. No one has answered the OP's question yet so let's have a go. If we mean all parents and all children then the answer in that they haven't stopped parenting. Some individual parents may have stopped, some may never have parented and some may have given up but parents as a whole have not stopped. You can't reasonably assume that because one child throws something at a car all parents have given up parenting. There are many very good parents and many good kids of which any parent would be proud.

 

[welsummerchicks]

From the posts here, it doesn't appear to be a new problem.

There are probably more families today where both parents work than there were 40 years ago, so I'd say that that it is indeed possible there are more kids who have less supervision after school. Only a few parents can afford after school programs and perhaps more kids grouping up after classes. I also think some schools give a shorter school day. Then it becomes an 'I dare you' situation.

We didn't do property damage or hurt people when we were young. But my generation had another problem to deal with...street drugs. All the way down to fifth and sixth grade, though for most kids it didn't become an issue they had to make a decision on, til high school. Some kids were around older kids - older brothers and sisters, usually, then there was a lot of pressure for some even at a very young age, and a lot of kids gave in.

 

[rufus]

Most of this happens about four miles north of my house.

Don't argue with them; just wave and smile. Los Mexicanos se burlan de la muerte.

Our governor asked Obama to send the national guard to the border. He sent us 15 signs saying don't go into the desert. When and if he sends troops, they will be unarmed. If these bozos can out shoot the Mexican Army, what will they do to a bunch of boy scouts.

I don't have a good feeling about this.

Rufus

 

[Dunkopf]

Quote:
You're not old school. You're just normal. Those kids are out of line and the parents should be told and if you have damaged property they should be made to fix it. It's amazing how cash outlay changes behavior. Parents can't control everything their kids do when not in their sight. So other people have to do it sometimes. Hopefully if you have proof you have called the parents insurance company or the police.

 

[Dunkopf]

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Do you live in Tx?. That's a pretty extreme view about kids there pardner.

 

[Dunkopf]

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It's illegal in the states too.

 

[xxSonja]

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It's illegal in the states too.

its a fairly new law here, maybe 2yrs old, and the statistics show a pretty good decline in incidents.
Did it not really have the same affect over there?
The consequences are pretty harsh here, no matter the age of the offender.