When is it time to face reality?

[seminolewind]

My honey ended his misery and had the surgery. So he;s got a ileostomy and he's home but recovering. Let me just say. I have been running non stop for 2 weeks now. And hospital every day. Last night DH tells me he will call around 9-10am for me to pick him up. I said I can't pick you up before 11. So he calls my dad to pick him up!!!! Even last night, he's acting like a spoiled brat and today more spoiled brat or just in a pi$$ poor mood. He isn't thinking about me for sure, LOL. Grrrrr!!!!! He better snap out of it.

 

[3goodeggs]

Aww. There have been big changes for him and that might be all he is thinking about.

Remind him gently that there are only so many plates that you can keep in the air and the less considerate he is of you and your needs, then plates will start dropping.

Be sure to get some alone time to center yourself. (Pet a chicken)

He is going through a lot, but so are you.

 

[donrae]

I'm glad he had the surgery and is home!

Coming from someone who has been incarcerated.....I mean hospitalized....far too much lately, try to cut him a little slack. He should straighten out once he's home a few days. Being in the hospital really jacks your mind!

 

[seminolewind]

Thanks, Donrae. No, he's gotten worse, LOL. Then he's upset that I'm not smothering him , so I made nice today. I think he has alot to get used to, but I really don't feed into "poor me". I think we've come to an understanding. And he really needs to sit outside with the chickens and his geese.

 

[VA Raptor]

So sorry to hear that you're going through this.

 

[3goodeggs]

Thanks, Donrae. No, he's gotten worse, LOL. Then he's upset that I'm not smothering him , so I made nice today. I think he has alot to get used to, but I really don't feed into "poor me". I think we've come to an understanding. And he really needs to sit outside with the chickens and his geese.

Yes, he needs to go outside. It will wear him out, but do him so much good.
We have had a bit of rain up our way, everything is wet and muddy. Hopefully it is still nice in your area of the state. Then again, sitting on the porch watching it rain is a nice thing too.

 

[Ol Grey Mare]

Yes, he needs to go outside. It will wear him out, but do him so much good.
We have had a bit of rain up our way, everything is wet and muddy. Hopefully it is still nice in your area of the state. Then again, sitting on the porch watching it rain is a nice thing too.

X 2
I hope that the two of you continue to sort through all of this - it's a difficult time for both of you and, unfortunately, each other are the easiest targets you both have for venting frustration.

 

[3goodeggs]

She is absolutely right! So vent to us. We can take it! Change is not always easy...and that was a big change for him... and you
He needs some 'poor baby' s.
... and hand him a small job to do, he can fold laundry and still be useful. He needs to know that recovery is not the end, it is the start.

 

[seminolewind]

LOL, you are so right. He slept outside on the patio last night. Never ever did that before. I don't know what got into him. But it must have been nice on a screened patio with a roof and listening to the pouring rain.

Thanks for letting me vent. This morning we changed his appliance and cleaned it up. Yes I will hand him a job to do!

 

[Suzie]

Karen,

I know so well about how difficult it is being the carer...

He will benefit from having a job to do...it will give him something to concentrate his mind on...instead of feeling incapacitated...amazing how the mind can focus on a task and the pain and discomfort fade away...

I can often feel sorry for myself with pain...but once I focus my mind on my animals...I can achieve anything I set my mind to...maybe give him lots of jobs...!

You are a strong character...and so is he! Keep smiling and when you get frustrated...go outside and scream...or chat with your chickens...they are great therapy!

Take care of yourself!