Why does she make it so difficult?!

[redhen]

Quote:
X2 ..what she said...

 

[FrizzleFreak]

Yeah...I think that'll work.
She'll call me a kiss-up though.

 

[Julie08]

its okay to suck up to your grandmother....

 

[horsejody]

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[ChickensInTheNorthWoods]

Quote:
I was raised to ALWAYS send some sort of "Thank you" for gifts but as an adult when I give a gift it is because I want to and expect nothing in return. I feel that "thank you notes" are a waste of time and resources - especially when the person was there at the time. Just my opinion - My kids always send thank you notes to the people who gave gifts but were not in attendance everyone else gets an appreciative hug and thank you when they received the gift.

 

[sfw2]

Quote:
What texasgal said.

And your grandmother was raised to send a written thank-you note, even when you have already thanked the giver in person. Nothing wrong with that.

 

[Rusty Hills Farm]

Your grandmother is from a generation that sets a lot of store by written everything. Invitations. Holiday cards. Thank you notes. RSVPs. To a world that lives via text messages, that can seem really really old fashioned. But it is more about her needing to feel important and acknowledged in a world where she doesn't quite fit in anymore. She just wants to know she is appreciated. In her day that meant sending (and receiving) thank you notes. When she was your age she probably had to do that dozens of times, so now when you DON'T do it, she feels slighted and undervalued, thinking that after all SHE did it so why can't you?

Just look at it as a kindness, a reassurance that she really does count in your eyes and you really appreciate anything she does for you. You will make her a happy old woman.

Rusty

 

[Carolina]

This is what I would tell my daughter:

You sound ungrateful, not because you are not sending thank you notes, but because you are complaining about such a small thing. BE GRATEFUL THAT YOU HAVE A GRANDMOTHER THAT IS IN YOUR LIFE!

All it takes to make her happy is a little note in the mail? That's not much. That's a teeny little thing. Just do it and feel glad that you can make her happy. She comes from an era when people did that--she loves mail more than email and phone calls. But you're going to dig in your heels because you refuse to be a gracious person?

There are tons of people who would love to have a grandma who cares, give gifts, and smiles at you when you do nice things. You should smile and feel loved as you shop for a box of sweet little cards, then send one off in the mail each time she does anything. Be creative and fun. Make it be a special grandma thing that you will tell your kids about. You'll like yourself better too.

I can almost promise you that she will keep the cards and think fondly of her one grandchild that is not a self-centered, roll-your-eyes-at-me teenager. Someday you will have the cards back and treasure them because they made your grandmother easier to love.

ETA: I posted when Rusty did. Ditto.

 

[gritsar]

Thank you notes are good manners and the older folks are sticklers for good manners.
I call my Dad once a week. He always thanks me for the call at the end of every conversation. However, I occasionally write him a letter - something the older folks also appreciate alot - and he thanks me over and over again for the letter.
ETA: I once took Dear Abby's advice and wrote my parents a "thank you for being my parents" letter. My Mom asked to be buried with it and was. That's how much a letter/note can mean to someone.

 

[toletiquesbysam]

Quote:
Great Point of view Gritsar!!! Little things in life can mean the most!!