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duluthralphie said:
The lakes are frozen over, but I doubt it is very thick yet. Too many warm days.

As soon as I finish deer hunting I will enter fish slaughtering season.
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Speaking of hunting, I don't mind it, my family hunts and I think it's really good for the environment, but does anyone else get slightly annoyed during hunting season when all the "invasive" hunters come out of the woodwork? I even wrote a short article about it...

An In-Depth Medical-Grade(ish) Case Study into the Invasive Hunting Virus​

Definitions
Hunting Excursion: a supposedly short outing in which the hunters believe they will catch their quarry in a matter of hours and thus do not come fully prepared.
Hunting Trip: an outing which the hunters believe will take a while and thus come mostly prepared, just to find that they have over-packed as they bag their prey in a matter of hours.
Invasive Hunting Virus: the main topic of discussion in this study. This virus is carried by invasive hunters and may be transmitted to native hunters. Like all of the strains in the hunting virus family, it is highly contagious.
Invasive hunters: this term is commonly defined as a breed of hunters without land of their own, however, a hunter that has no land of their own but hunts on government property or on rented land is not considered to be invasive.
Main Hunting Virus: a strain of the hunting virus family, this is a naturally occurring virus in most human breeds. This is an important virus to know but is not the main topic of discussion in this study.
Native hunters: these are a breed of hunters with their own land that they hunt on.

Overview
Invasive Hunting Virus is very similar to the other strains in the hunting virus family in that it is highly contagious and may result in a loss of good judgement. It differs from some of the other hunting viruses though in that it is carried primarily by the invasive hunter breed of humans. The virus may lay dormant for several months until a hunting season of particular interest to a member of this breed occurs. At this point, the virus takes control of the host’s brain. The invasive hunters then begin driving very slowly about dirt roads, in an almost trance-like state, looking to temporarily take over the native hunters’ land. After this main symptom, the virus presents symptoms that vary by host. We have clearly defined three of these symptoms. The first symptom is almost entirely benign. It results in a very polite invasive hunter which asks permission to hunt at decent times and will take whatever answer a native hunter gives with a smile on their face. The second symptom will result in a rather crazed invasive hunter which insists on being on a particular plot of land no matter what. This symptom creates an invasive hunter that is an annoyance and inconvenience, but not much else. The third symptom is by far the most dangerous. This symptom results in an invasive hunter that is able to integrate himself/herself into the native hunter’s society. Invasive hunters suffering from this symptom are super-spreaders of the virus to native hunters. The incubation period for the Invasive Hunting Virus varies widely, but native hunters should be aware that it may take hold in a matter of seconds. The most dangerous thing that can happen to a human infected with any of the hunting viruses is that they actually catch their prey. This provides an extremely hospitable environment to the virus.

The Case
In this case we observe an invasive hunter suffering from the third symptom who is friends with two native hunters. Native hunter 1 herein referred to as N1 has a case of main hunting virus. He asks the invasive hunter (IH) if he would like to join him for a hunt on his (N1’s) property. IH happily agrees. When IH arrives on the property though, the invasive hunting virus kicks in. The following conversation ensues:
IH: “No offense or anything, but this does not appear to be a good hunting spot for such-and-such prey.”
N1: “Whaddya mean? I saw some here a couple days ago!”
IH: “Yes, but this is clearly more of the occasional hang-out spot, such as a bar, for our prey. We’d have much better chances if we found our prey’s home.”
At this point, N1 becomes infected from the virus which has spread by aerosol from IH to him. He begins to believe that IH’s idea is quite reasonable. What they both forgot to account for though, is that during season, their prey behaves much more like college students and thus, are much more likely to be at the bar than at home.
His brain fully victim to the virus, N1 hops in his truck and follows IH driving the customary 20 mph in the middle of the road. Eventually, IH stops. He has found the perfect home for their prey. Luckily, it is located on the property of native hunter 2 (N2), a good friend of both IH and N1. They hop out of their trucks and very politely ask for permission to hunt the land. After N2 agrees, they ask if he would like to join them.
N2: “Oh, I don’t think so. I’ve got work, I don’t have time for a hunting trip.”
IH and N1: “Oh no, no, no! This is no hunting trip, this is a hunting EXCURSION.”
N2: “Well, you know, I haven’t seen many of such-and-such prey lately.”
N1: “You must not be looking at the right time. IH explained it all to me. This is a prime home for our quarry!”
N2: “In that case, I guess I can spare a couple hours.”
The three head out to the designated spot. There they wait. They wait until there is not a single chance of them catching anything due to the chilling rendition of lion growls that their stomachs are playing. They all agree that their prey must be quite clever and somehow knew they were coming and went elsewhere. N1 says that he has burgers at his place that they can grill. When they arrive back on N1’s property they find that yes, the prey must be quite clever, as there are tracks all over the place. The group finds that not only is their prey smarter than them, but clearly, of the thieving variety! They conclude that they must have left their drink of choice in N1’s driveway, where the prey stole it. Clearly, there is no other explanation as to how that much beer disappeared within the course of their hunting excursion.
 
Southies can you identify this?

FE1080DD-B4EF-4432-8709-1B16DDDDB4A7.jpeg
 

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