Thank you!! That was sweet
you are right but idk, I guess it’s just that I’ve only done like 3 things, and then have been on the iPad the whole rest of the time. I still kind of wasted the day a bit. Especially the last few hours. I should have gotten all the stuff I wanted to do done sooner and then now I’m done doing stuff but still sitting here. And I guess I’m kinda thinking my room coulda been cleaned better instead of just putting one little thing of clothes in a drawer. Idk. I guess I am just a little disappointed in myself that I couldn’t avoid checking it this morning plus I guess I’m worried about disappointing Kiki but also my parents. Idk. Mentioned it to my dad and he focused on how I said I wasn't gonna use it this morning/after what you said last night instead of the good I did. I made the mistake of telling him basically what I said here about how I’m majorly addicted to it and wanted to work on it. That was clearly a mistake. And then I mentioned him only focusing on the negatives and not any of the good i also said i did and he goes what are you gonna cry? Which I wasn’t even close to crying but was just frustrated/mad/upset/whatever. He’s just a bully. So I think that might be part of it. Idk. Especially since it also confirms what I was thinking myself about how I failed in my goal. Idk. But ****. Now I actually am crying thinking about all this. I’m such a baby. Geez. The ironic thing is my mental health has actually been pretty good lately, been in a pretty good place and haven’t really thought anything bad like usual, despite doing nothing/being way lazy all the time but yet today I actually manage to accomplish something and I somehow feel WORSE and more depressed
Aw that sucks
I’m thinking wood chips out there though. I’d have a dirt floor to work with instead of concrete like the one we have the group in now. 
