Advice needed on family and dogs

[FortCluck]

We have four dogs and my parents live 30 minutes away and we go there for the holidays... Usually we never bring our dogs, sometimes we might bring the puppy but that just stresses me out because she's all over the place.

My husband will leave halfway through the day to go put the dogs out and then he goes back to my parents. It has worked for us for over 5 years.

 

[Ninjasquirrel]

Well it seems pretty useless to even try to work with them if they're going to act like that... I have never owned a dog in my life that is not trained, I don't allow a dog to think it's the alpha! It seems like they have let their dog run wild for way too long!

This is unfortunately the case. They have had her for 5 years now and she still barks and bites people. This is imho unacceptable behavior. Especially since our nephew is autistic and has a tendency to pet the wrong way. She will growl, bare her teeth at him and try to bite him. Instead of working through it they just crate her and yell at her...also wrong imo. Dogs should get praise and treats for being good so they know what to do...not just punishment. I have raised Duchess on the idea that you do not get something for nothing and if you are good, good stuff comes from me. She was abused by her previous owner so we have had to be very patient and understanding. She has come a long way but she is not out of the woods.

 

[Ninjasquirrel]

We have four dogs and my parents live 30 minutes away and we go there for the holidays... Usually we never bring our dogs, sometimes we might bring the puppy but that just stresses me out because she's all over the place.

My husband will leave halfway through the day to go put the dogs out and then he goes back to my parents. It has worked for us for over 5 years.

I think the biggest reason I have for asking advice is also with my family. My sister is conjoined at the hip with her little dog. As such any of my family events end up with Duchess locked up. It's really unfair. She is a very good girl. I feel so bad about it.

 

[Peepsi]

I wouldn't put myself or the dogs through the anxiety. I'd leave my dog home and shorten the visit so that all could have a good day. With whatever you decide, I hope that you , your family, and the dogs have a good day.

Exactly. If you are visiting their home, and their dog is aggressive, then don't bring your dog to their home. Their dog is on its own territory, minding its own business, and your dog would be the intruder that is trespassing.

Either leave your dog at home, or board it for the day in a Doggie Day Care center or leave with a petsitter.

 

[FortCluck]

I think the biggest reason I have for asking advice is also with my family. My sister is conjoined at the hip with her little dog. As such any of my family events end up with Duchess locked up. It's really unfair. She is a very good girl. I feel so bad about it.

Why not have the holidays at your house next year and don't allow them to bring their animal... Just go with not bringing your dog this year and why don't you guys plan the holidays at your place so that you get a chance to have your dog be part of the holidays. That's what I would do...

 

[FortCluck]

Like I said we go to my parents for the holidays, but we have our own family holiday before or after my parents on a day that we choose is best. We make a holiday meal and we do gifts... I like my dogs and cat being part of the holidays without the stress so I just make our own day!

 

[FortCluck]

Play nice with your in-laws... Don't cause an argument or confrontation over a family pet, it's truly not worth it. It may be worth it to you, but others may not see it that way. Bringing your dog will cause it to be locked up, this will anger you and cause tension. If you don't bring the dog there won't be any tension to begin with, your dog will be at home sleeping and not even realizing what it's missing out on. You are the only one that's going to know what the dog is missing out on.

get your dog a bone or a special toy for it to have for the day while you are gone. The dog isn't even going to realize that it's missing Christmas or Thanksgiving. The only thing it's going to be doing is waiting for you to come home, but it will be sleeping so it won't even realize that you're gone that long.

 

[Ninjasquirrel]

Why not have the holidays at your house next year and don't allow them to bring their animal... Just go with not bringing your dog this year and why don't you guys plan the holidays at your place so that you get a chance to have your dog be part of the holidays. That's what I would do...

Our home is still being renovated by us. As such it's not exactly child proof. The child with autism is only 3. The SO has asked them to no longer bring their dog over because they refuse to leash her up. But...they do it anyways.When I asked my MIL if it would be possible to relocate xmas, maybe even put the two families together she simply scoffed and said something regarding the words: tradition, MY family, etc. I can't change them and I know it's foolish to try.I'm gonna talk to my SO about driving separate so that I can come home and let her out.

 

[FortCluck]

Our home is still being renovated by us. As such it's not exactly child proof. The child with autism is only 3. The SO has asked them to no longer bring their dog over because they refuse to leash her up. But...they do it anyways.When I asked my MIL if it would be possible to relocate xmas, maybe even put the two families together she simply scoffed and said something regarding the words: tradition, MY family, etc. I can't change them and I know it's foolish to try.I'm gonna talk to my SO about driving separate so that I can come home and let her out.

I just know how it is with family traditions and in laws... My dog goes everywhere with me, she's my sidekick, but I do know when to leave her behind for her own good and my sanity. I bring her home Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner so they don't even care that I leave them behind.

 

[Ninjasquirrel]

Play nice with your in-laws... Don't cause an argument or confrontation over a family pet, it's truly not worth it. It may be worth it to you, but others may not see it that way. Bringing your dog will cause it to be locked up, this will anger you and cause tension. If you don't bring the dog there won't be any tension to begin with, your dog will be at home sleeping and not even realizing what it's missing out on. You are the only one that's going to know what the dog is missing out on.

get your dog a bone or a special toy for it to have for the day while you are gone. The dog isn't even going to realize that it's missing Christmas or Thanksgiving. The only thing it's going to be doing is waiting for you to come home, but it will be sleeping so it won't even realize that you're gone that long.

I agree with you on this. I take the is it going to matter in 5 years approach to battles of the inlaws. I know it's best that if I have an issue to run it through my SO and have him say it's HIS issue. Very very delicate balance.