BYC Café

Discussion in 'Random Ramblings' started by KingOfFools, Jan 23, 2015.

  1. drumstick diva

    drumstick diva Still crazy after all these years. Premium Member

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    Krista, thanks to you I am realizing there ARE some perks to being really short. The only thing I bang my head on is getting out of my brothers car. I don't know why it dislikes me so much. Probably some transference going on.

    That's cool about the dr. being an obgyn - does he do neat stitches?
     
  2. drumstick diva

    drumstick diva Still crazy after all these years. Premium Member

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    Krista, next time wear a hardhat, they have some pretty cheap at lumber stores. I got one but you have to assemble it - still can't after several years. When I cut branches they usually land on my head.
     
  3. Mtn Margie

    Mtn Margie Overrun With Chickens

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    I have a pink hardhat that I wear when I am sawing down trees, but unfortunately it has bear slobber on it from when I threw it at the head of the bear that was coming into my house last night. It didn't see the humor in it.
     
    Last edited: May 16, 2015
  4. 3goodeggs

    3goodeggs pays attention sporadically

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    You have a very interesting life.
     
  5. scottcaddy

    scottcaddy Overrun With Chickens

    You, my dear, are not telling the 'Rest of the Story'. I want to know when you seen or dealt with a bear with humor!
    Scott
     
  6. Mtn Margie

    Mtn Margie Overrun With Chickens

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    I will tell you, now that I am rested a bit from yesterday's adventures. Not funny at the time, kinda scary, and then I got POed!!! Let me just say that my entire life seems to be run on "Things happen for a reason." I don't even bother to ask why anymore, it is just a fact of my life.
    Friday night 9 PM My little guy and I head off to bed because he has a wrestling tournament Sat and we have a 2.5 hour drive to get there by around 8 AM.
    Midnight - I hear a noise outside and so I get up, look out my top deck, nothing, go down to the back door, unlock the deadbolt to poke my head out and I stop and think, " What are you doing? It is freezing cold with hail slush all over and you are going to check on things barefoot and almost buck-naked? Geez, at least put some pants and boots on....." So I go upstairs and put my pants on, never got the boots on. All Heck breaks loose downstairs, with growling and banging and I am like, uh oh..... so I turn the stair light on, and go down far enough to see through the railing and there is a Gargantuan Bear coming in my house and the dog (now "good dog") is freaking out, going cujo in his crate as the bear is smelling and figuring out what to do. So I am yelling and waving my arms, nothing! "Crap, he is gong to eat the dogs in their crates!", I'm thinking, so I grabbed my pink helmet, hanging on my elk antler at the bottom of the stairs and launch it at the bear's head. When It hit him, he growled at me and started to come my way, and I screamed like a girl and bolted back up the stairs but on my way up, I saw him smell the new bag of dog food sitting on top of Roper's crate and he grabbed it. I told my now very awake son to get up now, there is a bear in the house. And I am like what to do, what to do, oh I know, fireworks down in the kitchen, yes, all I have to do is get past the bear so I grabbed the broom from upstairs and go down the stairs, he is just outside the door, so I creep over and tried to push the boor shut with the broom, but only got it a little closed, because there is too much dog food in the way! Crap! Sprint to the kitchen, slam the interior door shut, grab fireworks, lighter, fire one up, open interior door, launch firework into living room, Kabam! Launch another on at the space of the outside door, Kabam! Light number three,, now I am standing by the back door getting ready to throw this one out on the deck, son says, "Mom. be careful with the firecrackers!" I look at him and say" What? I am!" and then I realize that I haven't thrown number three and I almost dropped it right there, but I launched it out onto the back deck, Kabam! Okay, so I open the back door more and am looking out to see where he might be, no sign of him and now I am like, Okay, get the piles of dog food cleaned up so I can get the door shut, always thinking that he is going to come blasting back up onto the porch. Got the food in front of the door shoveled into the house, got the door bolted shut and then sent my little guy back to bed, spent another hour cleaning up and getting the very unhappy dog settled. Back to bed I go, can't sleep, just know big bear is going to try to break in the door, right....
    2 AM- Big noise on the other side of the house, I bolt upright, oh, it is my older boy coming home, phew, I so go downstairs and chat with him and make sure all of the doors are bolted again... back to bed
    4:30 AM Alarm goes off, gotta do critter chores, drink coffee and at 5AM, when it is light enough to see, I let the dogs out to pee and such and Roper heads to the top of the dog/ chicken run and goes off! I have yet another heart attack, thinking the bear is on the top of our property, but I am grabbing the shovel and cleaning up the piles of dog food across the deck and down the stairs to the dog food bag where he dropped it after the fireworks.
    Long day driving, good wrestling tournament, back to my home area, Oldest Son hands me a WW2? Russian sniper rifle and ammo that will drop a bear if needed, and I'm like okay, thanks, I know he will be back and at least if he is breaking the glass and trying to get in, we at least have something to stop him.....
    We get home, I check in with you guys, phone call " The horses are loose on the ranch! I call the owners, they are not home, getting dark, okay so now I gotta go catch horses. I get the horses in, go to a BBQ that we were invited to last minute, 7:30 PM
    and stay about an hour, go home to sleep because we have another early day today, I have the firecrackers at the ready... and the gun if he is breaking in and there is no other choice.....,,, blessed sleep until, dog alarm goes off, big noise on the deck, I bolt awake, light firecracker, launch it from my upstairs deck down at the bear, it goes off and he goes from 0 to 60 in about a half a second off the deck and away down the hill. Back to blessed sleep, awake for chores and a quick story to you all and now I am off to take little guys to wrestling practice and another fun filled day. Hubby will be back from TX tonight and as wonderful as that sounds, he don't do the bear scene, terrified of them, so I still get to deal with all that, but at least a I will have a two alarm system in place!

    Later, [​IMG]
     
  7. scottcaddy

    scottcaddy Overrun With Chickens

    WOW!! That is a real good 'rest of the story'!! I would have Hubby bring a whole lota fireworks back from the trip.
    Scott
     
  8. scottcaddy

    scottcaddy Overrun With Chickens

    Maybe remote controlled flash-bangs?
    I was just thinking.
    Scott
     
  9. Mtn Margie

    Mtn Margie Overrun With Chickens

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    I'm thinking rubber bullets/shot next because it won't take too long for him to get used to loud noises. DOW uses that before offing them. I am still tired....mainly over the driving part of the weekend. The sun is shining, so I am heading out for some real warmth.
     
  10. 3goodeggs

    3goodeggs pays attention sporadically

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    Wow.

    [​IMG]
     

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