BYC Café

[Chickenchick11]

Hello sourland!

 

[starbuck123]

I hate my mandatory work hours on Sat..the sun is out and I have so much to do today!!!

We had three huge trees taken down last November and immediately the day after that it snowed and covered everything, so the crew was limited on what they could clean up. Well, the snow is gone and yipes. Lots of woodchips and sticks to be gotten. That plus laundry, making bread and yogurt, church and errands..well. I need a clone! Have a good weekend everybody!

 

[3goodeggs]

You all seem like normal people, So I need to ask a question that has been perplexing me.
Then again I might not be normal and that is why I am perplexed.

My son was going to meet some friends at the local park to play D&D.
He is a geek. I have accepted that fact, he is a good kid, and into every life some geekdom must fall.

So this is what perplexes me. One kid finally showed up and said that the venue has changed to his house. Okay, fine, we put the kid's bike in the car and drive to this kid's house.

My son sticks out his hand to shake hands with the older brother. he's be in his mid twenties.
Our son has always done this, since he was a little boy: Shake hands and introduce yourself.
The kids older brother was perplexed. The the friend explain that my son is 'formal that way.'
My son introduces himself and waits for a name of the older brother.
Finally he says,' What name should I use in referring to you by?'

Why were these kids thinking my son's actions strange ? Is my kid too formal?
He is going to be going out into the real world soon. They won't throw rocks at him or anything will they?

Look them in the eye, shake hands introduce yourself.
manners or peculiar?

 

[scottcaddy]

You all seem like normal people, So I need to ask a question that has been perplexing me.
Then again I might not be normal and that is why I am perplexed.

My son was going to meet some friends at the local park to play D&D.
He is a geek. I have accepted that fact, he is a good kid, and into every life some geekdom must fall.

So this is what perplexes me. One kid finally showed up and said that the venue has changed to his house. Okay, fine, we put the kid's bike in the car and drive to this kid's house.

My son sticks out his hand to shake hands with the older brother. he's be in his mid twenties.
Our son has always done this, since he was a little boy: Shake hands and introduce yourself.
The kids older brother was perplexed. The the friend explain that my son is 'formal that way.'
My son introduces himself and waits for a name of the older brother.
Finally he says,' What name should I use in referring to you by?'

Why were these kids thinking my son's actions strange ? Is my kid too formal?
He is going to be going out into the real world soon. They won't throw rocks at him or anything will they?

Look them in the eye, shake hands introduce yourself.
manners or peculiar?

I say manners and good ones at that! Those manners will take him a lot of good places other kids will not even get a invite to.
Scott

 

[3goodeggs]

But, are they out of fashion? I am in my fifties, Maybe I don't know what is acceptable anymore.
Times change and maybe I have not been paying attention.

I have always noticed that most adults do not use manners to children very much, and most children do not use manners to other children.
We always did.

 

[sourland]

You all seem like normal people, So I need to ask a question that has been perplexing me.
Then again I might not be normal and that is why I am perplexed.

My son was going to meet some friends at the local park to play D&D.
He is a geek. I have accepted that fact, he is a good kid, and into every life some geekdom must fall.

So this is what perplexes me. One kid finally showed up and said that the venue has changed to his house. Okay, fine, we put the kid's bike in the car and drive to this kid's house.

My son sticks out his hand to shake hands with the older brother. he's be in his mid twenties.
Our son has always done this, since he was a little boy: Shake hands and introduce yourself.
The kids older brother was perplexed. The the friend explain that my son is 'formal that way.'
My son introduces himself and waits for a name of the older brother.
Finally he says,' What name should I use in referring to you by?'

Why were these kids thinking my son's actions strange ? Is my kid too formal?
He is going to be going out into the real world soon. They won't throw rocks at him or anything will they?

Look them in the eye, shake hands introduce yourself.
manners or peculiar?

You've got a good kid! Sadly, manners are becoming a thing of the past. When was the last time that someone held or opened a door for you? Today they are more likely to let it slam in your face. I've been asked why I help my wife with her coat and chair when she is being seated. "Because that is how I was raised, and it is respectful." One guy even asked me, "Are you trying to make the rest of us guys look bad?" My reply, "Most of you seem to accomplish that on your own."

Edited to add that our son was a D & D geek, and he turned out good. He'll be 50 in 10 days and today this self admitted couch potato geek completed his first half marathon. He got up off of the couch in November and started training after a thorough physical. From geek to athlete - you never know.

 

[3goodeggs]

I think what threw me was when my son's friend explained my boy's actions as 'formal.'

But I was also bewildered when I found out what twerking was, so... It's probably just me.

There is such a huge divide between me and the real world. Maybe that is why I hang out here on BYC.

 

[krista74]

If the men around here had the same manners as your son I would have been married 20 years sooner instead of marrying for the first time at the age of 40! It took me that long to find a decent man!

To answer your question - Is it formal? Yes, it is. Is it an example of good manners? My word, yes. Is it common? Unfortunately no. And this is just one of the litany of things that I could go on and on about that is 'wrong' with the world.

It might well be that within his circle of friends your son is the odd one out. But as Scott has pointed out, once he enters the real world he will jump ahead in leaps and bounds. I would expect that this sort of behaviour, whilst not common amongst teenagers, is essential in the business world. I shake hands and introduce myself to clients ALL the time. It would be rude not to!

And as Sourland said, good manners used to be much more common. It is a sad indictment as to how people raise their children now-a-days that manners are not prevalent now. Chivalry is dead unfortunately. This is why I married a man 10 years older than myself - so that if I happened to walk behind him I wouldn't get a door slammed in my face!

You should be proud! You have raised a son who knows how to behave properly. And if he's the only one of his kind then he will be snapped up in a jiffy by the most eligible young lass, and climb the career ladder ahead of everyone else.

- Krista

 

[WVduckchick]

(sitting in the corner next to your table)
Trying to decide if I should invite myself in.
A few more pages to read and I might feel comfortable joining in.....

 

[3goodeggs]

We grab you by the arm and pull you over.
I trip over sourland's outstretched leg and spill my coffee on his foot.
"Come in! Sit down, Join us, please do!"
it is a 24hr cafe.