Dad Jokes😂

[defazzy]

She's a sleeping beauty, roosting on the DIY Ladder Perch I completely built myself using a Step-by-Step guide

 

[BigBlueHen53]

She's a sleeping beauty, roosting on the DIY Ladder Perch I completely built myself using a Step-by-Step guide

Now that's a REAL Dad joke!

 

[Jester57]

They once organized a hopping marathon to protest the practice of shunning, which some groups use on their ex-members. They make members of the group completely ignore the ex-members; even if that ex-member is one of their own family. They had to cancel the event when they realized they were being somewhat premature.

Spoiler

They realized they would be jumping to conclude shuns.

 

[Isadora]

They once organized a hopping marathon to protest the practice of shunning, which some groups use on their ex-members. They make members of the group completely ignore the ex-members; even if that ex-member is one of their own family. They had to cancel the event when they realized they were being somewhat premature.

Spoiler

They realized they would be jumping to conclude shuns.

That surely led to an unhoppy ending.

 

[defazzy]

I have a little pet cemetery in the back of my garden where I put some vibrant roses as a memorial on special days. I've had so many beautiful moments with my pets, and these quiet moments really let me contemplate the meaning of life.

Last week I had to fence it with chicken wire because the hens were dying to get in.

 

[Jester57]

A meta dad joke: What is the difference between this joke and a theater review?

Spoiler

A theater review is a word on plays…

 

[NHWynns]

My dad accused me of being afraid of work.

I reassured him I wasn't. I told him I had no problem laying down next to it and going to sleep.

 

[defazzy]

Maybe a bit personal, but I really want to share. In real life, I always get eyes rolling when I'm telling these kinds of dad jokes. But here, it's so different with you all.

I'm so glad that everybody reading this is on the same page

 

[azurbanclucker]

A man walked into a seafood restaurant and asked for a lobster tail. The waitress smiled sweetly and said - "Once upon a time, there was this handsome lobster…”

 

[azurbanclucker]

Maybe a bit personal, but I really want to share. In real life, I always get eyes rolling when I'm telling these kinds of dad jokes. But here, it's so different with you all.

I'm so glad that everybody reading this is on the same page

The eye roll is that payoff! Personally, when I get a threat of physical voilence ("I will CUT YOU!") or an actual death threat, I know it's a solid winner.