Do you ever secretly wonder if........
- Thread starter crzychickenlady
- Start date
- Aug 23, 2008
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Quote:
Once there's a diagnosis they are supposed to set up an IEP. That's when they'll decide what therapies and how often as well as any accommodations needed. If they aren't doing their part then you have to take them to task. You have to be your child's advocate and be proactive. If it were me and say my kid started school this year and there hasn't been an IEP I would get a lawyer because all children have the right to education. I would also start looking at other school districts and consider moving (not that you should have to but it may just be better).
Once there's a diagnosis they are supposed to set up an IEP. That's when they'll decide what therapies and how often as well as any accommodations needed. If they aren't doing their part then you have to take them to task. You have to be your child's advocate and be proactive. If it were me and say my kid started school this year and there hasn't been an IEP I would get a lawyer because all children have the right to education. I would also start looking at other school districts and consider moving (not that you should have to but it may just be better).
Quote:
YES it is true, by chance I got my "difficult" kid into swim class, at a level below his age, with one on one instruction, and while in the water he is MOSTLY participating, which is far more than we can say for any other time of day.
The transition point of getting out into the car, going to the pool building and changing into swimsuit and goggles might be too stressful for average parents of "regular" kids; the tantrums he puts on are loud and messy; moving from one environment into another causes him high anxiety. THIS IS THE PART OF PARENTING THAT IS SO DANG HARD!!! How do we know what we're doing is best, if the result is a screaming, crying kid, or at least somewhat helpful? But once he is in the water, with the instructor on his arms and swimming him, he's getting some repetitive neuromuscular training which does help, overall. Plus, he has the advantage of knowing how to swim, which is a real, tangible skill. He is much better after the hour of swimming, too, it is clearly a therapeutic thing to do.
Beware the stinkeye looks from other parents when they see the special kid act up. Parents of regular kids don't get it. They say the dumbest things, like "well, what I would do is....." which obviously would work if the kid were average....which they don't seem to get, ever. Those parents are lucky, but they believe they are smarter and better parents than you & I because their kids never acted "different". They are blessed with predictable behavior, average growth and development, while we're on a parenting road less travelled. I know I would love an average road at times. After a lady at school said one of those idiotic advice gems, I said a silent prayer of thanks for her good fortune, as her children appear well. I wish that had happened for me, but its nice to see it regardless. So I thank God that its out there, somewhere.
In the meantime, I continue to try to help my different child reach his best potential. The swim lessons begin again this month after a holiday break.
If there's something like that near you, its definitely worth a try. If the child balks too violently at trying something new, its still worth a try, with extra help (ie, one on one instruction or another adult to help drive there) until the child learns to trust the new schedule. Please keep us posted!
YES it is true, by chance I got my "difficult" kid into swim class, at a level below his age, with one on one instruction, and while in the water he is MOSTLY participating, which is far more than we can say for any other time of day.
The transition point of getting out into the car, going to the pool building and changing into swimsuit and goggles might be too stressful for average parents of "regular" kids; the tantrums he puts on are loud and messy; moving from one environment into another causes him high anxiety. THIS IS THE PART OF PARENTING THAT IS SO DANG HARD!!! How do we know what we're doing is best, if the result is a screaming, crying kid, or at least somewhat helpful? But once he is in the water, with the instructor on his arms and swimming him, he's getting some repetitive neuromuscular training which does help, overall. Plus, he has the advantage of knowing how to swim, which is a real, tangible skill. He is much better after the hour of swimming, too, it is clearly a therapeutic thing to do.
Beware the stinkeye looks from other parents when they see the special kid act up. Parents of regular kids don't get it. They say the dumbest things, like "well, what I would do is....." which obviously would work if the kid were average....which they don't seem to get, ever. Those parents are lucky, but they believe they are smarter and better parents than you & I because their kids never acted "different". They are blessed with predictable behavior, average growth and development, while we're on a parenting road less travelled. I know I would love an average road at times. After a lady at school said one of those idiotic advice gems, I said a silent prayer of thanks for her good fortune, as her children appear well. I wish that had happened for me, but its nice to see it regardless. So I thank God that its out there, somewhere.
In the meantime, I continue to try to help my different child reach his best potential. The swim lessons begin again this month after a holiday break.
Wow. Reading this brings back memories....
My youngest son was always "different" and definitely went along his own path.
One time I was watching him from the window, raking leaves. He would rake....do a little dance....rake....
Another time at school he broke his nose because he couldnt get his hands out of his coat pockets fast enough....just two of the many things that happened with him over the years.
If, when he was in first grade, someone would have told me at age 20 he would be in college for accounting and doing very well, I wouldnt have believed it. There was loads of everything, despair, laughter, confusion in raising that kid, but I always loved and was proud of him.
My youngest son was always "different" and definitely went along his own path.
One time I was watching him from the window, raking leaves. He would rake....do a little dance....rake....
If, when he was in first grade, someone would have told me at age 20 he would be in college for accounting and doing very well, I wouldnt have believed it. There was loads of everything, despair, laughter, confusion in raising that kid, but I always loved and was proud of him.
Quote:
Oh that reminds me of the "chewies" the occupational therapist gave our son. He had rubber chew things, like tubing, especially good right out of the freezer! Its an assistive device for sensory integration problems. I think it really helps the kids gain attentiveness to their mouth. The Occupational Therapists (OT's) and Physical Therapists (PT's) helped us identify behaviours the kids do when they seek sensory integration. It became fun, at least more fun than stressful. ie, running into walls and falling a lot is also known as "crashing" to an OT, thats a kid seeking sensory input (that kid can't actually feel things very well all the time, but rarely they DID feel it, so they seek the feeling again and again).
Again, your original question was "...tell me these things are normal", and I'm probably figuring it is not normal. For most people. But I've seen it before, in my house and at therapy services' office waiting rooms! But remember, everybody's different and nobody's perfect. It takes all kinds to make a world full of people. My life is abnormal because my son is not normal, but I have to say I'm thankful for it, because he is unbelievably special, and amazing. The special ed people have said they're thankful to know him, too, so I believe these abnormal people are around for a very good reason (not just to stress us out!
)
Even being "a little bit off" is probably a blessing. More opportunity for double-takes and "why did you...." and "what?!" and "Now what?!". Average people only get that, maybe once a year. Maybe only on April fool's day.
Oh that reminds me of the "chewies" the occupational therapist gave our son. He had rubber chew things, like tubing, especially good right out of the freezer! Its an assistive device for sensory integration problems. I think it really helps the kids gain attentiveness to their mouth. The Occupational Therapists (OT's) and Physical Therapists (PT's) helped us identify behaviours the kids do when they seek sensory integration. It became fun, at least more fun than stressful. ie, running into walls and falling a lot is also known as "crashing" to an OT, thats a kid seeking sensory input (that kid can't actually feel things very well all the time, but rarely they DID feel it, so they seek the feeling again and again).
Again, your original question was "...tell me these things are normal", and I'm probably figuring it is not normal. For most people. But I've seen it before, in my house and at therapy services' office waiting rooms! But remember, everybody's different and nobody's perfect. It takes all kinds to make a world full of people. My life is abnormal because my son is not normal, but I have to say I'm thankful for it, because he is unbelievably special, and amazing. The special ed people have said they're thankful to know him, too, so I believe these abnormal people are around for a very good reason (not just to stress us out!
Even being "a little bit off" is probably a blessing. More opportunity for double-takes and "why did you...." and "what?!" and "Now what?!". Average people only get that, maybe once a year. Maybe only on April fool's day.
My son has ADHD and Tourette's. He is on medication and has been since he was in 2nd grade. He is 12 now and is still a little less mature than his peers (in interests and behavior). He gets along much better with the younger boys. We have been through MANY different medications some were worse than others as far as side affects go but everyone of them makes his tourette's worse so he is also on a medication for that too.
It may not be a bad idea to have her checked out. You don't have to go the medication route, there are alternatives. They just didn't work for us since my son has a more severe case.
It may not be a bad idea to have her checked out. You don't have to go the medication route, there are alternatives. They just didn't work for us since my son has a more severe case.
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