Expectant parent club! Where the pregnant people hang out.

[babymakes6]

I haven't posted here in a while. I posted a long time back about being pregnant with number 2, and then discovering it was a miscarriage from the get go. (I even made a joke to my OB when I saw the ultrasound about how many underdeveloped chicken eggs I had candled to know that was never going to hatch!)

I got pregnant again a couple months later, in November. We lost her at 22 weeks gestation. I was really excited to have another little girl, and for my daughter to have a little sister. I'm 38, and not young in the eyes of OB/GYNs, and am considering trying again, but am scared out of my mind. I really don't want my daughter to NOT have a sibling, but not sure I am in the frame of mind to decide to try again, or not. Just really scared of having another loss, but am sad about not being able to give my daughter a baby brother or sister.

I am so sorry for your losses. I am thankful I haven't had to go through that, but I sympathize with anyone who has. It is heartbreaking.

 

[reveriereptile]

I haven't posted here in a while. I posted a long time back about being pregnant with number 2, and then discovering it was a miscarriage from the get go. (I even made a joke to my OB when I saw the ultrasound about how many underdeveloped chicken eggs I had candled to know that was never going to hatch!)

I got pregnant again a couple months later, in November. We lost her at 22 weeks gestation. I was really excited to have another little girl, and for my daughter to have a little sister. I'm 38, and not young in the eyes of OB/GYNs, and am considering trying again, but am scared out of my mind. I really don't want my daughter to NOT have a sibling, but not sure I am in the frame of mind to decide to try again, or not. Just really scared of having another loss, but am sad about not being able to give my daughter a baby brother or sister.

Sorry to hear about your miscarriages. That would be hard on anyone especially 22 weeks along.

You might talk with your OB about it and see if maybe you are having a hormone problem. My cousin became pregnant but had a miscarriage and she was tested and found out her body's hormone levels kept dropping. They did have her try again and were checking her often but the levels dropped again and she had another miscarriage. It was hard on her since she didn't have any children of her own and always wanted a large family.

With you already having one child it seems like you should be able to have another one to full term. You should definitely talk with a doctor about it and then decide from there if you would like to try again. I wish you luck and hope you have another healthy child.

 

[bhazell123]

Me and my hubby were together for four years and never used protection or tried not to get pregnant . But in September I Started walking regulary and eating a lil better and in late October I got pregnant at which I didt find out until the first week of December at which I didt believe the doctor lol. So I think truly only the man up stairs can decide when babies happen or not so have faith and pray and try eating a lil better and walking a few times a week ( not sure if you do or not just this is what worked for me ) and I've been told a few times that it always happens when you least expect it so best of luck to you and hope you get pregnant soon

 

[reveriereptile]

Me and my hubby were together for four years and never used protection or tried not to get pregnant . But in September I Started walking regulary and eating a lil better and in late October I got pregnant at which I didt find out until the first week of December at which I didt believe the doctor lol. So I think truly only the man up stairs can decide when babies happen or not

so have faith and pray and try eating a lil better and walking a few times a week ( not sure if you do or not just this is what worked for me ) and I've been told a few times that it always happens when you least expect it so best of luck to you and hope you get pregnant soon

From the looks of it we may try next month since my husband has a nasty sinus infection and I'm starting to get it too. That will give me more time to get on a good healthy diet. I don't do to much moving around but need to since I'm starting to get a little bit of flab. For first time my pants are getting tight and not from growing up either. My husband is wanting to walk more too so that might help.

 

[cassidy22]

Because I had a miscarriage at 8 weeks, on my second pregnancy, the put me on a hormone right away, that I stayed on through my whole first trimester to ensure I had enough hormones to carry the pregnancy. I imagine they would do that again. I lost the other pregnancy at 22 weeks due to a rare genetic abnormality that they didn't detect early on, and it took a while to diagnose it, but it became obvious as she got bigger that there were structural defects, and she stopped growing. So there wasn't anything there that I could have done to prevent it. When the DNA doesn't form correctly, you really can't adjust it. Believe me, as an engineer, I have all the data I can have on both failed pregnancies. Just not sure if I want to try again at 38...

 

[MoJos Flock]

Cassidy- I'm so sorry for your losses. I can empathise. I went through six losses before *I* figured out that I have low progesterone- none of the doctors I saw ever looked for or suggested anything, because "you're young; these things happen". I'm so glad you have a good doctor and good information.
as for being hesitant to try at such "advanced" maternal age...I wouldn't, but only because I don't want to he raising a baby when I have a kid in college. both my grandmother and an aunt have had babies at your age or older (my aunt was 38 with her second, and 41 with her last; if I did the math right, my grandma was 39 when she had her last). both say that this pregnancies were harder than younger pregnancies, but neither would give up those kids for the world. wishing you peace with whatever you decide.

 

[cassidy22]

I didn't get married until I was 31, and had my first at 35. So my oldest is only 3. My husband and I would like for her to have a sibling... I just want her to have someone else as her family when her dad and I are gone... I didn't have the opportunity to have babies when I was younger. So I can't compare and can't complain about pregnancies being hard or not.

 

[ebwy2]

I had my son when I was 35, miscarried at 36, and will be 38 when this one is born it's not too old!

 

[Wickischickies]

I have noticed that this one is harder on me then my other child who is now 12. I am very fit and eat healthy, no fast food for me. When we decided to have another baby we talked about it for two years. It took us another year of trying before we were able to conceive. We had given up hope. We stopped trying and thought maybe we were too old (he's 49, I'm 36). Today I'm washing used baby items we purchased and preparing for the day. The doctor told me this week that I can not travel anymore until the baby is born. He also told me I am still too active.

Congrats to all the new expecting moms! Good luck to those who are trying.

I don't remember who was asking about the test to see if the baby will have any problems. Here's what my "high risk" doctor told us, only take the test if the baby shows signs of issues. It increases your chance of miscarriage, or infections greatly. We decided not to have the test, it wasn't worth the risk of losing the baby at our age.

 

[KellyHM]

Cassidy - So sorry for your loss.

I can't imagine going through that. If you really want another child I say go for it. 38 isn't all that old considering some of the people who have babies these days.

reveriereptile - I had the 12 week NT scan and bloodwork that goes with it to rule out the chromosomal stuff. If any of them had come back positive I would have had the amnio, but luckily I didn't have to worry about it. DH and I decided before we ever got pregnant that there were just some things we couldn't/wouldn't deal with. I realize not everyone feels that way, but I think either way it's good to be prepared.

I'm 28w5d now. Can't believe it's getting so close! I hope this baby girl is as calm and content as my son was!