friendship advice...help needed....

[chickenzoo]

Do not lend what you can't afford to lose.................
Rent is important, but not important enough to her that she can't save for it?
This is not like....... she was in a bad accident and can't work, or her house caught on fire and burnt up her purse and all her stuff etc.......
If she needs money, she should sell some stuff not ask you for it........
Just say I'm sorry, I don't know where you could get that kind of money...... I hope your landlord works out something with you......

 

[Dixiedoodle]

Take it from someone who has "been there, done that"...once you start loaning them money--it NEVER stops.. It will always be something, some need, want, desire...


I have come to the conclusion that----" if they can't afford their rent, they sure can't afford their rent and my loan payment" !!! We have been burnt so many times it's not funny..

Some borrow it and pay it back but then have to borrow it again--leading to a never ending process!!

Some borrow it and you don't see or hear from them again..

Some borrow it and pay you a small amount and you never get another dime..

If we were to get back all the money that we have "LOANED" we could buy a new truck with it!

If you can't afford to 'loose' the money---don't lend it... If it's just extra money, 'give it to her' --then it's not a 'wall' between you when it's gone.... AND if she does repay it==you'll be so surprised...

 

[Southernbelle]

Give her some suggestions like selling some of her stuff on ebay, sell plasma, something!

I wouldn't cross that money boundry with a friend.

Where would it end?

 

[Dar]

Quote:
they dont pay for donating blood products here in canada

the part that sux is her dh does not know they are 1+months behind in rent he drives a big rig... and she is a school bus driver

 

[Rillion]

Quote:
Okay, ignore my previous advice. If she has a husband and can't even talk to him about this, she has no business asking you for money.

 

[blossom hen]

Frankly, it is time for her a hugh reality check! And apparently there's one in line for her DH as well, since he doesn't know how their money is spent. Bottom line: you probably are about to experience a hugh strain on your "friendship" with this person. You are in somewhat of a no win situation. If you loan the money, you will most likely not get it back, no matter what she says about repaying it. If she miss manages funds so badly, how could she repay? So, if you "loan" money and she says she will repay, then does not, you will feel badly toward her. If you do not loan it to her, she will most likely feel badly toward you. It sounds as though she feels you "owe" her the "loan" of your vacation funds. (Maybe she's feeling unspoken - or unacknowleged - jealousy over your plans.) Only you can make the decision; good luck however you decide.

 

[JLMom]

Maybe she could sell that tatoo she got.

(Seriously, don't loan her the money.)
((And don't feel guilty that you are going on vacation in January. You saved up for it, and you don't need to defend yourself to anyone)

 

[redhen]

Did she have a rock solid plan to be able to pay you back by vacation time? Follow your gut..if you feel you can trust her then i'd do it..(but also be prepared to not get it back and it messing up your vacation...) As someone else said..never lend what you cant afford to loose. Good luck!

 

[insiderart]

If you decide to lend her the money, be prepared not to be her friend anymore. You will be the bad guy when you want that money back....

I'd say it's a line you shouldn't cross.

 

[chickenlittle32]

I, personally, wouldn't loan her the money. If she is struggling to pay it now, just imagine when she's got to owe you and also another months rent?