Having this child now reassures me of some things.

your story brought tears to my eyes this morning. you are doing fine, telling the child. (its okay to come out etc.) it will be a long time it sounds like for the child to feel comfortable and maybe some counseling. (hugs to you)




andrea-
 
WOW! You just brought tears to an old man's eyes. That baby has no idea what love and security is. You know the answer- consistency along with lots of hugs and cuddling. It will be a long road, but he is young enough that all psychological damage he has endured should be repairable. I admire you for what you are taking on.
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Three year olds can be trying in the best of circumstances (I've got 2 three year old granddaughters who have very normal lives) let alone when they've been exposed to what he undoubtly has. Just keep loving him.
 
Have you seen those tents that go over a kid's bed? My nieces have one shaped like a fairy castle. I know there are boy types too. Not only are they fun and cool, they might make him feel more secure.

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to you for loving this child.
 
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I have seen those and they are adorable. Right now he is sharing a room and bed with Sara. She has a kind size bed, and there is no room in there for another bed. If he stays, we will need to do some rearranging.
 
What a great service you are doing for this child! I may have misunderstood your post since I don't know the story, but here's what I was thinking.....

Maybe you are already doing this, but you could contact your state and getting "foster training" if possible and see what resources they offer. It is amazing how getting a "bad" start can effect children in so many different ways. Not only can foster training give insight on why the children act the way they do, they will give you good advice on methods of disciplining and positive rewards for children with these types of issues(neglect, abandonment, abuse, etc.) It can really give understanding, plus they offer support groups and can get you in contact with others who are going through similar situations.

Good luck with your new little one. What a blessing you can both be to each other!
 
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That's the key LOVE. I'm not the best dad in the world but I try my best with lot's of LOVE. I'm 47 with 2 & 3 year old boys and a Grandson right in between the two. My oldest boy is 21, then the step kids are 19 (the only girl) 16, and 12. It can be really tough at times. Now that i'm a little older I can look back and say that Loving them is what got us through the good and not so good times with the older kids.
 
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I have only just seen this thread but its brought tears to my eyes such a young little boy to have these isues, its happening all to often. Its only my opinion but he is one of the lucky ones because he has you and your family giving a warm and loving home. Patience we are told is a virtue a saying i didnt fully understand untill i had children and boy can it run out with the best of us. Love and reasurrance, time and understanding with kind but consistant discapline is all you can give. if you could meet other parents/care givers in similar circumstances maybe swap ideas, the ups and downs it may help give you confidence in what you are already doing is right. I hope this little boy gets to stay with you and learns to feel safe and loved and forget his unfortunate start in this world.
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for you and
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for your little boy.
 
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I am stinkin angry, well I am simmering right now. Sara wanted to go party tonight and had arranged for the childs mother to babysit!!!!! Um NO! She she is po'd at me right now, and still trying to figure out how she can go out.
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