im bout to puke.. advice please

[LoneCowboy]

I didn't get married until I was 42, I made it happily on my own all that time, and it was well worth the wait. You both have a lot of growing up to do still. Sounds like she's going through that stage we all go through when growing up gets to be too hard. You know, your parents never told you what it was really like to be grown up did they.

Lot's harder than you figured. But hang in there, I promise you better days, much better days. Like that new country song out by Brad Paisley, Letter to Me. You should listen to it, it's really good.

 

[newchickowner]

yeah its easier said than done. haha

I know, I've had very few relationships in my life and that's because they were all over 4 years long. But I wasn't married, no kids, and when it did break off it was quick and easy. That doesn't mean that I wasn't devestated at the time and I'm not discounting your pain. But looking back in my experiences, I learned what I didn't want in my husband when I did finally marry. We don't know your personal relationship beyond what you told us, but I agree with Southern, she doesn't sound like the one for you. Stay strong, don't drink, and try to learn something from this. You'll be fine. We're backing you! :aww

 

[peeps7]

Well for one thing I wouldn't be crying over a girl who treats you like that. Like Southern said, I met some of those crazy boys who fall madly in love with me and then the next day they find somebody else. Finally I just let the boys do all the pursuing they want and when they come to me then that's when they get a chance. All you can do is pray for this girl and make sure she gets it right.

 

[PurpleChicken]

Dave,

I'm sure it hurts and it will continue too for a while. Time will make
you feel better.

Sometimes age doesn't matter. I have know some young kids who have
wonderful relationships. They are one in 100. If I had gotten married
at 20 it would have been a disaster and I've know my wife since we were 18.

We all want to say something that will make you feel better but there are
no words. Just do things that will take your mind off it.

And please, don't be fooled by the notion that a girl can make you happy.
Only YOU can make you happy. Only then can you have a real relationship.
Many people never figure this out.

Don (37 year old who has been through it all)

 

[Southern28Chick]

PurpleChicken Wrote:

We all want to say something that will make you feel better but there are
no words. Just do things that will take your mind off it.

And please, don't be fooled by the notion that a girl can make you happy.
Only YOU can make you happy. Only then can you have a real relationship.
Many people never figure this out.

Well said!​

 

[Frozen Feathers]

Been there, done that and it sucks.

I was with my HS sweetheart for 3 years before I realized I was not happy. It was a very messy break-up...but i'm glad i stuck to my guns and followed through. I definitely say I'm so glad I didn't stay with my HS sweetheart. I hear about how he is now and and he has turned out to be an awful person. People who are abusive to the ones they "love" hardly ever change and you can't make them change. You can't change a person...just slightly "train" them and even that is not easy. Do you know how long it has taken me to "train DH to take the trash out...lol.

Someone who calls you names and puts you down has issues and you are better off without a person like that. It may hurt right now, but trust me it does get better... not with alcohol, that just makes it worse, not only do you have to deal with a nasty hang over in the morning, but it doesn't change anything.

You'll find someone who appreciates you and that you appreciate, it may take a while, but why be in a rush? A girlfriend/boyfriend shouldn't ever make you feel like a lesser person and if they do they should get a boot right in the behind and sent out the door.

 

[snugglepup]

Everyone is giving you great advice. I had a bad breakup around 19, I think. And previously I thought I was In Love (of course). Now, 10 yrs later... I think back and realize 2 things:

1. Thank god I didn't marry that loser! I would never have met the man I'm married to now, who is sweet to me, and treats me well, and always pulls over so I can save turtles in the road. (and he's pretty cute, too)

2. He wasn't even cute! I slept with him??? What was I thinking???? Ugh.

Time gives you a lot of perspective. But you know what else, I have been like 6 different people since I was 18. So don't worry, you've got a long way to go. And listen to the Purple Chicken, he sometimes says smart things.

 

[Scrambled Egg]

Well Dave, in the cold, harsh light of moring, how are you feeling now? Hopefully more resolved to let this girl go and move on. Believe it or not but this painful experience will help you become such a better partner for the person that really deserves you. Just consider Ms. Party-Hardy a practice girlfriend for you and go out with your guy friends until you get to feeling better about not practicing with her anymore! You really will get through this, promise, we all have....

 

[jdypat]

when a hen leaves her nest, there is not much you can do. If you tie her down and force her to nest, she will fight so hard she destroys the nest completely.
the best rooster cannot control her when she decides its time to jump out of the nest and free range.

 

[erinm]

Sorry but if this is regualr behavior for her then good riddance! erinM