I'm never gonna get an egg!!!

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pitbullmomma said:
They're over 26 weeks now, and STILL NO FREAKIN' EGG!!

I did see a horrific case of rape this morning, my rooster climbed on top of my bantam cochin, dug his claws in, and started flapping around and biting the back of her head with his beak!!! She was screaming and clucking like she really wasn't enjoying it. Is this chicken sex? (what the hell?!) Does this mean my egg is finally coming? I can't believe roosters do all that nonsense, just so they can touch buttholes or whatever it is they do. Ewwww!!! Horny males, they're just like humans, lol! (sorry guys I'm just playin') :)
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That is so funny! ... ' horrific rape',but you are willing to overlook that if it means 'my egg is finally coming'. Your writing is so often hilarious, I LOVE it!:lol:
 
biophiliac said:
That is so funny! ... ' horrific rape',but you are willing to overlook that if it means 'my egg is finally coming'. Your writing is so often hilarious, I LOVE it!:lol:
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Thanks, Vera! I crack myself up once in awhile, lol. But seriously, that sh*t made me think of that old Tool video/song from the 90's called "Prison Sex," except it could have been one called "Rooster Sex." It freaked me out, so violent and loud and ugly! I was hearing that song in my head.

And then I thought: All this, for a cloacal kiss. Cuz really, all they do is touch buttholes. It's really messed up, the things that hormones will drive a critter to do. The head-biting-with-the-beak thing.....just, ewww.
 
Well I can honestly say my rooster is being a gentleman I've not seen one butthole bump all day! It might be because the girls are molting, it might be because he's getting really fat. Either way I'm really proud of him.:)
pitbullmomma said:
Thanks, Vera! I crack myself up once in awhile, lol. But seriously, that sh*t made me think of that old Tool video/song from the 90's called "Prison Sex," except it could have been one called "Rooster Sex." It freaked me out, so violent and loud and ugly! I was hearing that song in my head.

And then I thought: All this, for a cloacal kiss. Cuz really, all they do is touch buttholes. It's really messed up, the things that hormones will drive a critter to do. The head-biting-with-the-beak thing.....just, ewww.
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pitbullmomma said:
They're over 26 weeks now, and STILL NO FREAKIN' EGG!!

I did see a horrific case of rape this morning, my rooster climbed on top of my bantam cochin, dug his claws in, and started flapping around and biting the back of her head with his beak!!! She was screaming and clucking like she really wasn't enjoying it. Is this chicken sex? (what the hell?!) Does this mean my egg is finally coming? I can't believe roosters do all that nonsense, just so they can touch buttholes or whatever it is they do. Ewwww!!! Horny males, they're just like humans, lol! (sorry guys I'm just playin') :)
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:lau :lau
If you think that's bad, don't ever get ducks! They can be brutal!
But ya know, some gals like it rough. :lol:
 
Chickassan said:
Well I can honestly say my rooster is being a gentleman I've not seen one butthole bump all day! It might be because the girls are molting, it might be because he's getting really fat. Either way I'm really proud of him.:)
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Some say that roosters should not mate in front of their humans. And I've heard that many don't. I've heard my tiny silkied serama chasing the girls, but I've never seen him catch them. But the broodys hatched his babies, so he is getting the job done! :p
 
Oh I've seen him do the bump,i don't care if he does it in front of me he's a rooster and i don't think they have one ounce of shame. Lately though it's like he'd rather just eat.Maybe he's getting ready for winter or he's just not into bald chicks.:)
WVduckchick said:
Some say that roosters should not mate in front of their humans. And I've heard that many don't. I've heard my tiny silkied serama chasing the girls, but I've never seen him catch them. But the broodys hatched his babies, so he is getting the job done! :p
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He's got baldies squatting left and right and he's like...."hey are those peanuts over there?" I'm not too concerned about it right now, but come spring he's going to have to do his rooster duty. Also I'm puzzled as to why some people think a roo shouldn't bump in their presence. I know it's not the nicest thing to watch,but i really don't think they know it's offensive. I think people put waaaay to much thought into that sort of thing. "Says the woman who hand feeds her roo everyday and gives him comb rubs."
WVduckchick said:
:lau
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pitbullmomma said:
Thanks, Vera! I crack myself up once in awhile, lol. But seriously, that sh*t made me think of that old Tool video/song from the 90's called "Prison Sex," except it could have been one called "Rooster Sex." It freaked me out, so violent and loud and ugly! I was hearing that song in my head.

And then I thought: All this, for a cloacal kiss. Cuz really, all they do is touch buttholes. It's really messed up, the things that hormones will drive a critter to do. The head-biting-with-the-beak thing.....just, ewww.
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I've heard ducks are twice as terrifying. Just sayin'. :lol:
 

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