my husband left me

[FrenchToast]

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Not quite sure how you came to that conclusion either. Anyway I remember my sisters advice when I was heartbroke. She would ask me if I thought my life was better with him or without him. If you think with your head and not your heart I think you would make the right choice but that is very hard to do.
I have come to realize after all of these years that many times when I was crying about a breakup I wasn't really crying for the loss of what I had but instead I was crying for what it could have been. There is a big difference. But at the time it isn't obvious.

 

[kyeschicks]

 

[Time-Out]

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I'm sorry, but I don't agree with you. I could not write a list of the things I love/hate about my OH. He's not a political party or a holiday resort. He's a package. You can't help who you love, why you love or whether you ought to love. I love my man, faults and all, and nothing will ever change that. You've just got to work on things. As a woman, sometimes it's best to work behind the scenes, rather than sitting him down for a 'chat'.
I'm a relatively independant woman. I could figure most things out myself; it's fun. However, I ALWAYS thank my OH for EVERYTHING he does around the house. Not to make him feel good (that's just a side effect), but because I am honestly grateful for his help. Anything he does is one less thing for me to do. Simple things like that go a long way.
I also have boxes of tissues in every room, because my OH sniffs. I still wouldn't say it's something I don't like, I'd just call it 'work-in-progress'

Don't think about why you love him, just remember that you love him and the rest is history.

Now, I'm going to contradict myself probaby end up saying something similar to what cassie meant. If he doesn't love you, don't waste your time on him. It is time that might bring about a man who loves you, as a package, and who you'd love too. No one can make the decision better than you, but we can certainly all smother you with

Your posts have made me well up inside. I know that I have no idea what I'd do were I in your shoes, but you are an inspiration. I only hope I remember to come back here if it ever does happen.

 

[rancher hicks]

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There are no crystal balls so I doubt anyone can tell what the future holds. Whats more there are worse things than loneliness. I've been married for a long time and I never saw it as a trap.

You need counseling to sort things out. You can't know what the future holds but you might want to find out where things went wrong. Not that you are in the wrong but somewhere things took a wrong turn. Plus counseling will help you think clearly and not follow what you imagine things are like for him or your future. Don't believe everything you think. And definitely get a lawyer.

Hope you get some counseling, it will help.

I wish you the best,

Rancher

 

[turney31]

I am torn with you taking him back.... Kudos to giving it a good chance... BUT please don't wear blinders. Be ever vigilant. He may have just realized he can't keep his toys without your money. I forgave my X twice and he still cheated again. Some men WILL take you letting them come home as a sign of weakness on your part. Being watchful and smart doesn't mean you're not "all in" a reconciliation. Best wishes for your situation.

 

[kuntrygirl]

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[Luvducks]

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WELL SAID!

 

[beckt]

Like I always tell my son when he askes me what to do. I always tell him to do what his heart tells him is right. Seems to work for them.

Good luck on the decisions you make. And remember not everyone is going to agree with you on everything. Only you know what is right for you. As for my situation him not coming back was the right thing for me.

 

[HappyRoo]

Someone wrote from Texas:

" I am torn with you taking him back"

Uhmm ! Seems like to me that only someone related or knows them personally could say That, are you !


Just my 2 cents .

 

[FrenchToast]

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I think what she was trying to say is she is worried on one hand and happy on the other that she may take him back. Someone once said to me, actually it was the XBF, "Proceed with caution, but go for it " !!

Alot of us have been in her shoes and know that even taking them back and forgiving sometimes isn't enough. The chances of it working are either 0 % or 100%. Either they make it or they don't !! You won't know unless you try. And that is her choice to make. I think alot of us would just like to spare her from more heartache but only time will tell. In the end it will all work out one way or another but there will be peaks and valleys along w
I think you are reading more into it then you need to. JMHO