my husband left me

[Elite Silkies]

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It was bad enough the first time around, and then get her hopes up of reconciling their marriage and then hit's her with this! Some people have no care in the world about others feelings/emotions.

I agree, an affair IS a lie.

 

[KellyHM]

 

[debilorrah]

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It was bad enough the first time around, and then get her hopes up of reconciling their marriage and then hit's her with this! Some people have no care in the world about others feelings/emotions.

I agree, an affair IS a lie.

I agree with you. I have many choice words for the man that can't be mentioned here, but one that comes to mind is weak.

 

[zzGypsy]

ah, sweetie, so sorry it is going this way.

it may not make sense to you why he won't try, but know this... if he's unwilling to try, better to find out now than to be drug through that knothole many more times while he sort of tries, but really doesn't.

sometimes, as much as we want and hope a thing will be, it's just not a match.

you can keep his family, even though you're not keeping him. let the rawness pass a little bit, but you don't need to lose them too.

and keep up the work with the therapist. you've turned over some important rocks, and now's the perfect time to dig... been there, done it, this is a moment of great leverage and insight into yourself, a chance to learn more about yourself so later, when you're ready, you can find, and be, a better match.

huge

and willing ears any time you need them.

be gentle on your self.

 

[Elite Silkies]

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It was bad enough the first time around, and then get her hopes up of reconciling their marriage and then hit's her with this! Some people have no care in the world about others feelings/emotions.

I agree, an affair IS a lie.

I agree with you. I have many choice words for the man that can't be mentioned here, but one that comes to mind is weak.

I will never understand how one human being could be so cruel to another. I can't say what I really think either

It is not nice at all.

 

[chickened]

Good for you drawing the line for him. Time to move on, it will get better.

 

[FrenchToast]

I am sorry to hear that things are turning out the way they are

Nothing anyone can say will ease the pain but good old time. I too have some word I would like to throw at this so called man and I don't even know you or him. You will realize one day that this was all for the best in the end. What would he do when you really needed him in old age or illness. He is a very weak individual with some real issues.
I would send her a silver plater !!! There is a reason his first marriage didn't work. Some people just are not cut out for a true commitment.

I sure wish you didn't have to get rid of all of your chickens !!! Are you sure you can't keep them ? I think they would be good stress reliever. Doing the things you enjoy will bring you comfort AND you never know when you might meet someone that shares a common interest, whether it be a friend or ??????? There are alot of Chicken enthusiasts (sp)out there !!!! Btw is there a place for singles to hang out on BYC ???

You will be fine, you are a very strong woman !!! Hang in there. Thinking about you !!

 

[cottagechick]

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I don't know how old she is, or whether there is a son or a boyfriend/husband in her life. But there's someone. He has a grown daughter (20) from a previous marriage that ended a very long time ago and never wanted more kids. Can't imagine he'd take one on.

I had a fantastic afternoon visiting with and getting moral support from my aunt. Not one tear shed. Even ate some food for the first time in days. Thought the beer would be a bad idea so passed on that. When I got home there was an email from him asking for loan and insurance information for the boat and SUV. I told him he had to take on those payments or we'd sell both, that I wasn't going to pay for his hobbies if he wouldn't work on our marriage. I guess he's putting that in place. It's sad because it makes this more real, but it's what I asked for and needs to happen. My name is still on the loan so I told him to tell me if he decides to sell, someone buys into the boat, etc. If he could take on the loan in full I'd walk away from them. If I can get those off my roster I can probably take on the house loan in full, and hopefully he'd walk away from it.

God this sucks. I don't understand how someone can go from "i love you very, very much" one week to "i don't know if I want to be married to you anymore" the next. Because of the trollop, I suppose. Can't forget that.

Thanks again for all the support.

It wouldn't hurt to call the loan company and see if you can get your name off of the loan. You won't know unless you ask. Don't blame the other woman. His actions are not her fault. She didn't take him away at gunpoint. Trust me. If it wasn't her, it would be someone else. In the long run, she will get exactly what she deserves. The way he has treated you is the way he will one day treat her. Eventually you may come to realize she has really done you a favor.

I agree with the fact that they have done you a favor. But I don't think I would let the trollup escape blame entirely. It is true that if it wasn't her it would be someone else. That said, I don't think that makes her lily white. His is the more egregious of the two, yes. But if she knew that he was married she is an idiot and a (words fail me). I never did understand woman (or men for that matter) who think they can get a married person to leave their spouse for them and it will work out well. "I just know when he abandons his marriage and marries me it will be forever...????" Just know that they will both get theirs when reality sets in. And you are free of a self absorbed moron.

 

[Whispering Winds]

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[rebel-rousing-at-night]

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WOW! You have it together!