Weeg
Enabler
Wow, I just read through this thread.
I want to start by staying your are doing an amazing job! You are 100% not getting overly concerned about this, you are doing everything right. This what the true spirit of BYC is about! Not all people would do what you are doing, you seem to care about animals so much, and thesis chickens are surviving off of you, you are keeping them alive. Fantastic job!
I have had similar experiences with good friends of mine for the same idea, same doesn't want to listen, or more just gets offended really easily, and then avoids the situation. It was a friend of mine who wasn't helping take care of her horse, and since she kept her with me, I was doing a lot of the work.
Now, I have noticed that being firm and getting mad, (which I have in my situation when the discussion seemed to be going in one ear and out the other) doesn't work. It sours the relationship.
What has worked for me is what I call sucking up. The biggest reason people down listen is because they think your calling them back animal keepers. I like to start my statements with the sentence, " Your doing a great job" or " Your doign the best you can" or " You have really good intentions, and I don't think your doing a bad job, but...". Then, I find they aren't always as defensive. You can also include, " I really want to help out with this, but I don't want to do it all myself." Offer help and support, and even if you down think they're doing a good job, say they are. I find that its all, about, wording. If you can keep them from getting defensive, they're more likely to want to listen.
After that, pictures, videos, keel bones, articles are all great suggestions. I really hope you can work this out, and I also agree that authorities are not the best way to go. That leads to diffusive neighbors, and that doesn't' help the situation.
Remember your doing an amazing job, just keep you it up, and you got this! Good luck, and so sorry your in this situation.
I want to start by staying your are doing an amazing job! You are 100% not getting overly concerned about this, you are doing everything right. This what the true spirit of BYC is about! Not all people would do what you are doing, you seem to care about animals so much, and thesis chickens are surviving off of you, you are keeping them alive. Fantastic job!
I have had similar experiences with good friends of mine for the same idea, same doesn't want to listen, or more just gets offended really easily, and then avoids the situation. It was a friend of mine who wasn't helping take care of her horse, and since she kept her with me, I was doing a lot of the work.
Now, I have noticed that being firm and getting mad, (which I have in my situation when the discussion seemed to be going in one ear and out the other) doesn't work. It sours the relationship.
What has worked for me is what I call sucking up. The biggest reason people down listen is because they think your calling them back animal keepers. I like to start my statements with the sentence, " Your doing a great job" or " Your doign the best you can" or " You have really good intentions, and I don't think your doing a bad job, but...". Then, I find they aren't always as defensive. You can also include, " I really want to help out with this, but I don't want to do it all myself." Offer help and support, and even if you down think they're doing a good job, say they are. I find that its all, about, wording. If you can keep them from getting defensive, they're more likely to want to listen.
After that, pictures, videos, keel bones, articles are all great suggestions. I really hope you can work this out, and I also agree that authorities are not the best way to go. That leads to diffusive neighbors, and that doesn't' help the situation.
Remember your doing an amazing job, just keep you it up, and you got this! Good luck, and so sorry your in this situation.
