OMG I killed her Omg omg *update on the extent of Munchies wound

[kvmommy]

OMG...I am the worst person in the world. I can't breathe. I can't breathe!!!! My poor chicken was attacked a few days ago...she started dropping her wing alot and I was worried about infection. I checked on here and decided that I needed to give her Pen G like everyone said to. I got it at the feed store. Everyone said 1 cc in the breast. I just did exactly like I said and she immediately died. In my arms. She ****** died in my arms!!!! Then afterwards she started flop around and it was the most horrible experience of my life. I can't breathe...I can't do anything. I can't stop shaking. This is a nightmare. WHAT DID I DO?????? I just wanted her to be better. OMG....I hate myself. I can't stop crying. Oh God...I feel like this is a dream. What did I do wrong/????????? Please tell me. I can't take it. I have to get rid of my chickens now. I can't look at them...I never want to see chickens again. I can't believe this. I can't believe it.

 

[nurse_turtle]

Deep breath. You most likely injected the medication into her lung and/or heart or a major artery. When an injection is given, you should always pull back on the plunger before pushing the medicine in. If you see blood when you pull back on the plunger, immediately remove the needle and apply pressure. It really sux that you had such a horrible experience and that it so traumatized you. The creature that attacked your hen in the first place is the one who set all other events in motion.

 

[TheJadeChicken]

OH! I am so sorry and hugs for you! R.I.P Chicken

Just take deep breaths and calm down. Your upset, and you may think you can't handle the chickens. Mostly everyone has had a horrible moment of losing an animal precious to them. Things happen and everyone makes mistakes. You're human and it is what we do. We make mistakes and learn from them. She could have been to weak for the shot or any number of things. All we can do is try.

I have lost A LOT of animals and some I think were my fault. Geckos, chickens, goats, dogs, fish, and many others.

 

[silkiechicken]

Don't worry. It happens. If it is of any consolation, the moment she started flopping around like crazy, she was gone. Those terrifying flaps are just involuntary reactions once the brain no longer functions. No need to panic or be too upset. Just remember next time to pull back like mentioned above, and that the thickness of a layer breast is going to be maybe an inch or less if they are sick. Store chicken breasts you may be familiar with are 3-5x thicker than the average yard bird.

 

[Lydz]

I am so sorry, but one thing I can say is that you tried. A lot of people wouldn't have cared enough to nurse it back to health. You tried, you cared, and you loved and that is what really matters. Accidents happen, even the most skilled vet, surgeon, doctor, you name it, have made mistakes just like the one that just happened to you. The fact that you care so much tells me that you are exactly the kind of person that should be caring for animals.

 

[kvmommy]

Thanks guys. But I keep having these visual and sensory flashes. I seriously feel like a crazy person. I have never taken a life besides hitting animals with my car. Its horrible. I never knew it could feel this awful. I've buried my other chickens that have died from injuries and whatnot and it was sad...but I can't even go in my shed. I put a towel over her and left. I tried to go back but I got sick. I guess I'll have to wait til DH wakes up and have him do it.

Her breast did seem so thin. I actually just got wormer because I can pet my chickens, but not hold them. Until munchies was attacked, So I didn't know they were thin. Or thinner than what I'd think they're supposed to feel like. They are definitely thin compared to the store chickens. I don't think I went that deep. I wasn't even sure the needle entered her skin, I started to poke and it hit something hard almost immediatelly. I tried to move the feathers to see, but didn't see so I just plunged.

If it were a surgery or something intricate, I wouldn't feel so bad. But it was just a shot!!! I should have done it in the thigh. I kept reading do it in the breast, but I thought the thigh sounded safer. I should have did it in the thigh. I don't think I can keep the chickens. I've had so many slaughtered in the past week. And munchies was my favorite. Its sooooo awful.

 

[TheJadeChicken]

Thanks guys. But I keep having these visual and sensory flashes. I seriously feel like a crazy person. I have never taken a life besides hitting animals with my car. Its horrible. I never knew it could feel this awful. I've buried my other chickens that have died from injuries and whatnot and it was sad...but I can't even go in my shed. I put a towel over her and left. I tried to go back but I got sick. I guess I'll have to wait til DH wakes up and have him do it.

Her breast did seem so thin. I actually just got wormer because I can pet my chickens, but not hold them. Until munchies was attacked, So I didn't know they were thin. Or thinner than what I'd think they're supposed to feel like. They are definitely thin compared to the store chickens. I don't think I went that deep. I wasn't even sure the needle entered her skin, I started to poke and it hit something hard almost immediatelly. I tried to move the feathers to see, but didn't see so I just plunged.

If it were a surgery or something intricate, I wouldn't feel so bad. But it was just a shot!!! I should have done it in the thigh. I kept reading do it in the breast, but I thought the thigh sounded safer. I should have did it in the thigh. I don't think I can keep the chickens. I've had so many slaughtered in the past week. And munchies was my favorite. Its sooooo awful.

That is normal and it will get easier over time. I couldn't even bury a dog after it was attacked by my neighbors dog. My mother had to do it. I also couldn't even bury my rat. :/

When my D'Uccle Mille Fleur was thin after an impacted crop. I told my mom to give it in the breast. But she felt of it and thought it would be better in the thigh. I said okay do it in the thigh. And she did. Millie is fine now. She limped for a couple of days, but nothing major.

 

[angelicflamesva]

Take some deep breaths & cry your eyes out...then cry some more (let it all out!)...then drink some wine or smoke one (whatever calms you down) and eat something sweet & lots of it!
What your going through is normal for someone who cares so deeply...which is why I agree with the other person who said you are exactly the type of person who SHOULD own chickens & other pets! I met a farmer just the other week who can't stand animals in pain or any deaths, she couldn't even get her cows horns removed by the vet because the second she saw blood she freaked...and this woman has owned a farm for MANY years & has TONS of animals. So believe me when I say, you are NOT alone!
Its a horrible thing that your going through & it doesn't get easier to loose anyone you care for, but just remember the good times & try to keep yourself extremely busy for the next week or so while you go through the grieving process...it really helps keep your mind off of blaming yourself! Have your DH make a nice box for her & bury her with flowers then focus on the other animals that need your love & care right now. Please don't give up on the others who need a loving mom like you! Seriously, you did your best & thats more than most & again why the others need you!!!
Sending you lots of virtual HUGS!!!

PS
My BF had to put down his cat of 17yrs last month...he used our 22, so it was quick & painless for her but it shook him like nothing I've seen...it took weeks for him to get back to normal & he went through every emotion related to grieving and HARD...but thats because he is such a deeply caring person & his love for her will never die! It may take a while, but remember this too shall pass!

 

[LindaCT]

You did your best and she didn't suffer. That is the most anybody can do, so I hope you feel better soon.

 

[rooaroo]

Ok, I have a friend who got a round of 25 chicks this spring and he was so pumped and I went through things with him to make sure his chicks were having a good start. He built a coop and the top was open, as mine is, and a couple of nights he forgot to lock them up, something came in and tore them up. The look of frustration and emotional angst on his face was telling me, I am done chicken farming. Until I came over and said look, you need this this and this and don't give up. He was ready to give me the last 6 he had left. He didn't give up, he took steps to really securing his coop and run and for over 2 months now, nothing has gotten his chickens, and he has still even forgotten to lock them up.

When it comes to taking your chickens life, the above are right. You do care and that is the kind of person who needs to take care of animals. So many are mistreated in this world that it does make a difference when someone puts their heart into raising them. I will tell you that if I had done this to my favorite, lady bird, I would be like you. Give it a couple of days and maybe even ask your friend or partner to tend to the chickens. Don't give up. I cried that I let my rooster give two of my hens wounds while mating. You are doing a good job, please do not stop raising chickens.