poured in my life can't it stop? Dads Gone9/25/10Gmas Gone10/31/10

[Iowa Roo Mom]

and prayers for you and your family.

 

[KBChicks]

I'm so very sorry

You and your family will be in my prayers

 

[justbugged]

I am so sorry that you lost your dad way to soon. When you started this thread, I was really hoping that you would have had more time with him. I do understand the relief though that comes from knowing that your loved one is no longer suffering. I think that the hardest thing we ever live through is living with a close family member dying. There are stages to grieving sometimes it helps to read through them. I think that it helps to know that you are not alone and what you are feeling is normal.

PS Children often understand death better than we do.

 

[Lunachick]

I'm so sorry for your loss. He went knowing you loved him.

 

[muddyhorse]

 

[chickeypoo]

I had a pretty rough night last night and was doing well today, but tonight when i got on here, it all came flooding back. i read a bunch of my posts and posts of others to my hubby today.. and they made me cry but it was a good cry. It's been a rough rollercoaster and it's been pretty sad. it's hard when i know others have been sick longer and are still alive, i know that sounds selfish... but i can't help that right now. his brother came after he passed and he's been sick for many years. when i was little he almost died of heart issues. and i think it broke him yesterday to know that my dad had passed before him.


i didn't get to post what happened last weekend cuz it was such a busy week. my dad came up to spend time with us. and he asked DH to check his oil, and while he was doing that dad asked me if we could take him to his daughters grave. She died when she was maybe 1 1/2. in a house fire. he always blamed himself for not coming home from the store sooner and his ex wife blamed herself for not waking up sooner. anyway, i said sure. so DH and i, and the two youngest took him up to the gravesite and i wheeled his chair up to the grave and i took a couple pics and we left.

when we got home, he wanted me to call my sister so i texted her and called her, and she didn't answer. so he left. she text back a few hours later and i told her dad asked if she was coming and that we went to te grave. and she asked who did.. and i told her who did. and she let loose on me.. just @#%^$%#%^ nice since im the one who asked him to go. i told her whatever and it wasn't my problem.. and she said.. not very nice stuff.. not forum friendly. and i said ... the same back and that dad asked me so i said yeah, so she should be mad at him.. not me. and i said it again.. she dind't say anything back. now. this was all through texts. i was so mad that she was upset with me for taking him to the site.. even though he asked. she was acting so mean.. she's 11 years older than me. and maybe i could have handled it better but i felt so awful that she was mad at me for doing something for dad. so i told my dad that she could go somewhere very hot.. and i explained why..and he wasn't happy.. he said he was going to talk to her about it. anyway, i don't know if he did or not. but now she's acting like nothing ever happened and im still upset with her over it.

anyway, DH put it nicely to me.. She needs to realize that if we hadn't taken him.. he never would have gotten there. but when she text to me where she's the one that suggested it.. i just got the feeling of a five year old throwing a temper tantrum. someone who always gets their way. ya know?

so... here's one of the last pics of my dad. the pain in his leg was pretty bad.. so he was in his wheel chair. he was down to 97 pounds when he was admitted to the hospital on thursday. that was 3 pounds less than a week before.

 

[Boyd]

Much love and hugs Sue

 

[Lunachick]

Aww chickeypoo

 

[chickeypoo]

That shirt he is wearing doesn't do justice for how skinny he really was. i think my 12 year old weighs about as much as he did. his legs were so tiny... and his arms were too. i could put my hand around his upper arm and my fingers touched. that shirt was so big and baggy.

so anyway, this last week we had bunches of rain, and the place we went to the grave was all flooded. the road we drove was under 1-3 feet of water. so... yeah.. it's wierd how things work.

i love my dad.. i always will. he gave me 45 dollars to *help me along* and i tucked it away to help pay for my tattoo.. lol. i didn't tell him that.. but in my heart now i can always say that he helped pay for it.. and it will forever be a part of me LOL. but id been thinking of getting a "Daddy's Girl" tattoo small maybe behind my ear. scripted.. pretty.. nice.. nothing overly big or anything. so i think that im gonna put that money towards that one.. and pay for the other myself LOL.. i dunno.. i haven't travelled down that road yet..but i will be going to town tomorrow.. where i get mine done

LOL.. so who knows what tomorrow holds.

 

[sfw2]

That picture of your dad is so touching. Like he was telling his little daughter that he'd see her soon.

Don't waste your time being mad at your sister. Just know that you made your dad happy. God bless.