She "dumped" her ferret on us. "Rant"

[CityGirlintheCountry]

I agree with what everybody has said about tough love. She's an adult and it's time she's responsible for herself (since she can't play sweetly with the basic rules you've set up in YOUR house.)

About the ferret- Please don't take it to the Humane Society or county shelter. Most haven't the faintest idea what to do about a ferret and generally just euthenize them (unless someone that works there is willing to take it on.). There are a couple of ferret shelters in Florida that are really good. I can't remember where they are off the top of my head, but PM me if you are interested and I'll try to track that info down.
Ferrets are a big commitment and it's not fair to you or to the ferret for it to be dumped on you. Considering that they live around 8 years, it's a long time to be stuck with a pet you don't want.
Good luck!

 

[mtnhomechick]

Quote:
Over the years, I have learned to *always* listen to my dogs.

Sarah

DITTO

 

[Quail_Antwerp]

I sent you a pm. I know about a great ferret NO KILL shelter in Florida.

Check the ferrets right ear. If there are two tattoo marks in his ear he is neutered and descented and has had his first distemper shot, and he is a Marshall's Ferret. Marshalls is a large ferret facility and they breed mass quantity of ferrets.

If there are no tats in his ears, he could be a Path Valley or a Triple F Farms Ferret.

If she just got him from a petstore, chances are he's only had one set of shots. If she got him from a third party, no telling. And ferrets can have a lot of different health issues.

Pm me anytime. I have 6 ferrets and all but one has been a rescue.

Good luck with you daughter. I will keep her in my prayers!

 

[jvls1942]

I have only read the first post in this thread..

does anybody else see a pattern here?? dogs left, cats left.ferrets left ???

You can only be taken advantage of if you allow it..

she broke your ground rules, kick her out.. she knows you will not do it.. and so do we. time for some tough love..

 

[The Chicken Lady]

Quote:
Tell her that if she doesn't take her stuff with her when she leaves for the party, she will find it outside the locked house in garbage bags when she gets back. Ask her to turn in her house key to you, or change the locks. Inform all other family members NOT to let her in.

Whatever you tell her you're going to do, DO IT.

 

[BeardedChick]

Tough love it will be definitely be when she comes around again. I figure she may show up sometime today for her party clothes as she has a party to attend (like that isn't what she has been doing for days). She will be told she and the ferret need a new home.

See, I think this is still not tough love. I'm going to try to explain, but I first want to say that I am in support of you not trying to criticize you.

I think you need to take the leader ship role. The leader doesn't sit down and explain to her that the ferret needs a new home and that she has to move... The leader gets rid of the ferret TODAY, packs up her things TODAY and sets them outside where she will either pick them up or the garbage man will, and that's it. You can talk to her about it afterward if she wants to have a constructive conversation. It's a matter of showing her that you are going to act decisively and there is NO NEGOTIATION. You are leaving her too much room to negotiate, and she is *clearly* taking advantage of your kind nature.

I do understand this may not be something that you are ready or able to do just yet... But give it some thought.

Big hugs!

 

[skirbo]

Quote:
I have to agree and I'm also not trying to criticize. I would also point out that these things are influencing your younger children. If you let this situation go on with the older child, chances are you will have this problem again with at least one of the others as they reach adulthood, if not sooner.

Think of them when you are doing this.

CHANGE THE LOCKS ON YOUR HOUSE. Do not give this daughter the new key.

Sarah

 

[conny63malies]

I am glad that we are not the only family with problem grown up kids.

 

[FunnyFarmer]

Quote:
Oh, you are SO not the only ones. I agree--I wouldn't wish this kind of situation on anyone, but it does help to know you're not the only ones with crazy family problems. Shoulders to cry on are great--but they're even better when they can say "been there, done that, you can get through it and life will go on. Oh, and you're not a horrible person."

 

[conny63malies]

Quote:
Oh, you are SO not the only ones. I agree--I wouldn't wish this kind of situation on anyone, but it does help to know you're not the only ones with crazy family problems. Shoulders to cry on are great--but they're even better when they can say "been there, done that, you can get through it and life will go on. Oh, and you're not a horrible person."

I always say atleast our problem kid isnt my blood and our kids dont have ex wife blood.
But troubled kids can tear families apart. Sometimes they have to go as low as living on the street or in the shelter to figure out life in general. I use them as a bad example" DO you wanna end up like yoursister? you dont? thought so"