Should I get a Pup or not?

oesdog

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I wanted to see what folk thought.
I have had three Old English all rescued. All three had all sorts of issues and the guy in my Avatar died about a month ago.
Naturally the house is quite empty and we miss him. My Daughter said the house is too quiet you should look for another dog. We already have another rescue dog a miniture Schnouzer but my Daughter says its a rat on a lead and not big enough to be called a real Dog. Well we are more BIG dog folk.

The thing is - We have two disabled kids who are 25yrs old. This restricts us somewhat. Dh has to have heart surgery soon again so he won't be walking or teaching a puppy. It would be on me. I asked my Dad and he said of course you should get one because it is "your thing" for you and your DH and nothing to do with care or any of those things for the kids. We are thinking very hard about getting Danny the lad who lives with us into perminent residential care before he is 30yrs old which would be 3/4 yrs tops. Also the government here are stopping the grant sceme we have for getting care in. Of course we wont be able to have him here without care as DH is not getting any better. We simply cannot do the level of care our boy now needs.
DH is at high risk of a heart attack and I may very well end up here on my own if things go down that rout. I could not look after Danny alone here anyhow so he would have to go into care if something happened to DH. I guess Dad thinks if I got a good Pup it would be company for me for a good lot of years whatever happens.

I miss the old Dog Murph a great deal and this is the longest we have been without a big dog in over 20yrs. I am kind of getting used to not having him here and at times I see the benifits. Like when we take the MG for a spin we have the room to put the little dog in with us and take him - before we would have had to take the big car and not had the MG out much. We used to ride Motorbikes years ago but with DH being ill we can;t do that and the MG has become our "toy". So we like to go out in it when we have some us time which is very little and its nice to take the little dog too.

If we had a large fluffy dog he would not be able to come with us when we go abroad. - We are thinking of taking some time out in Spain for DH and I to recover from all the stress and of course DHs heart surgery. So I was thinking - wait? Do that first and then in a few years get a pup from a proper breeder and not an older dog with issues from the Oes rescue. Somedays DH and I are in tears because we miss Murph but getting a pup wont bring Murph back though it will fill a void. In truth I am worried I will get used to not having a big dog and like it? I miss him terribly though and never thought we would be without him so soon. Folk say with everything I have to do here I shouldn't have a dog but in truth I have loved and enjoyed every moment of having all of them over the years. Going out on a walk helps me to have "me space" and I have someone to talk to who doesn;t interupt or tell everyone what I say! In the evening it is lovely to sit and comb and groom all the big hair! I have always been a big hair girl! So the grooming isn't an issue. We got into the Oes dogs because DH wanted a big "man dog" and I didn;t want a big scary dog. It is hard to be scared of a big fur ball. Also I have asthma so I am restricted to woolly or wirehaired breeds. It is kind of Old English or Poodles? I hate Poodles!

So what do you all think? - Should I get another dog? A baby pup? I have never had a tiny weeny Pup before so it would be a big learning curve. I didn;t want a Big one to start with because I don;t want a big rescue dog with issues comming in and bulldozing the little dog or hurting DH. I wanted time to train it before it is fully grown! So it will walk beside DH even off lead. It will learn to walk beside the wheelchair with Danny and not pull. It takes time to teach those things and a big dog is so much harder as they learn bad habbits so you have to re-teach. Doing that with a fully grown Oes would be hard work.

I have been looking at pics and imagining being a mum to a baby pup - but then I imagine DH and I having freedom and going out and not having care issues and going to spain where it is warm and nice and enjoying getting well.

Yes no wait - ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh?

Oes
 
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Now heres something i know ALOT about. LOL
I love dogs and have 2 at the moment, (who are great with chickens by the way!) both had from pups 6 weeks old, they are cute adorable and who can resist a puppy? BUT they are alot of work alot of time and can get you down somewhat with house training etc.
It sounds like you have a lot on your plate already but i know for a fact that puppy will put smiles on alot of faces, and sometimes all the crap is worth that alone.

Id say go for it, but it is a bigger thing than people realise to take on,

Good luck though and let us know what you decide!
 
you can get service dogs that are perfectly trained that help out alot u dont have to go through the puppy stage and u get to take them everywhere!!!
 
Give yourself time. Losing your dog obviously upset you and you seem to be in a lot of confusion and grief. There's nothing wrong with not having a dog, even if you are a dog person. Also, there is nothing wrong with prefering big dogs and having a little one. You won't really know just what you want until you have time to really consider things. You said you still have your little Schnauzer... Let it be your crutch for now.

I feel your loss and I am truly sorry that you are going through this. I wish you luck with whatever you choose to do.
 
I am going to put my 2 cents in....We had a wonderful dog for 12 years and just had to put her to sleep last year....so I KNOW what you are going through!!! It is VERY hard! We got a pup about 4 months later and she has been wonderful! She does NOT REPLACE the other dog she just fills a new spot in our hearts of her very own. I still miss and think about our old dog on occasion. We also just got a pup for my 9 yr old son a week ago...and OH BOY!! Taking care of a puppy SUCKS! With all that on your plate AND you and DH wanting to travel I think I would pass on a puppy. Get everything settled and your mind at ease BEFORE getting a dog. I think at first getting a pup would be fun...then it will add to the stress you are dealing with SEVERAL times over!


edited to add I agree with moomoodiddy IF I got a dog it would be a service dog, fully trained to help out with the household issues. That could possibly ease stress NOT add to it!
 
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No we don;t want or need a service dog. There is nothing a service dog can help with here unless he learns to change nappies and drive!

The thing with the pup was that it would be for us DH and I and somethng away from the care stuff! We love Dogs and have had them all our married lives. We are well awair of the mischief and all they get up to. Our last Dog was only 18 month old when we got him. He was a terrible lot of hard work. As he was rescued and spent his whole puppy life locked in a shed. I spent a good long lot of time training him - hard work but a lot of fun. He was a great dog but hard work to train a fully grown fur ball. It is much easier to train a pup that doesn;t have the physical strength a mature boy does. So - that is why because I want to train it up in my way not have to correct others mistakes and cruelty like I have done with all three of the other Oes dogs weve had. But going to Spain and having a big hairy dog doesn;t mix. IT is one or the other. I was thinking go to spain get DH well and in about 3 yrs get the pup. A proper baby pup from a good registered breeder and get to know the breeder and what to do with a baby. Murph was the youngest dog I ever had and he was 18 months. He was still growing when I got him and we had to buy bigger harnesses and dog crate for him after 6 months. 18 months isn;t very old so I think well they stay with their mom until they are about 12 - 14 weeks tops. 3 months - 18 months is 15 months - can I manage 15 months? I managed my grandaughter didn;t I? I think I can do it ok but maybe wait ???? Thing is folk look at my life and see the care issues and think OMG look at all that stuff and then they assume anything else will be more pressure and not a joy , or something I get to have fun with. So I live in a bubble of care and life is on hold and I have nothing for me because others tell me you can;t because well you got a bum to clean so get back in your care box! Put on the gloves and go scrub someone elses backside! - Life has to be MORE THAN THAT!

Oes
 
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Oesdog, I guess I don't understand why you couldn't take a pup to Spain with you. Is it a legal issue or are you worried about the heat? I understand when you say the dog is for you. When my husband was dying and I was doing all the caregiving without help from his kids my dogs were my sanity. They didn'tr whine and demand they just gave unconditional love when I needed it most. Also they kept my husband company when I had to be at my business. They were large dogs too.((wolf/malmutes) A puppy is alot of work, but of a different kind than caregiving. What does your husband think? The puppy might well help in his recovery from heart surgery. I have been following your story for some time. This is just my 2 cents. Best wishes and my prayers are with you and your family.
Deb
 
Oesdog, I guess I don't understand why you couldn't take a pup to Spain with you. Is it a legal issue or are you worried about the heat?
Deb

I believe that there would be a quarantine period when traveling from one country to another, usually about 6 months. And then there would be another quarantine period when it was time to take the pup back home.

OES, you will know when the time is right.
 
You had mentioned that you thought the government was going to cut out the home care option, therefore you would be losing all of your help. In that case a service dog could help out alot. You also mentioned that possibly you were considering an alternate living arrangment for the disabled children. I hear from you that alot of changes are going to happen in the near future, if I understand correctly. That is why I suggested to wait. I would go on my vacation to Spain while the help is still in the home, and have a worry free, much deserved vacation. Then when I got back, I would make the new living arrangments and get my kids settled in......at that point the puppy would be a wonderful diversion, as I am sure the kids moving out would be difficult.
 
The reason that I wouldn't be able to take the Oes to Spain is because it would be too hot a climate for a big hairy dog. It would overheat very easily there and that would be a disaster. The coat is very thick like the coat of a sheep so it is not the best type of dog for that climate at all.

As for quarentine. - We are allowed to take Dogs to europe now on a special pet passport. So that is not the issue. I wouldn't be happy taking a big fluffy dog to that climate they over heat and die so quickly.

As for Service dogs. - I really don;t want a service dog. My son is very mentally handicapped so he would not be able to instruct a service dog and there really isn;t anything a service dog could do here? As I said if it can;t change nappies or drive it's not much use!

Someone said they took great comfort in their dogs when nursing their husband. - That it just it. My dogs have been a great help to me over the years. I often refered to Murphy as "my mate! " He was there and supported me in a way another human couldn't. He seemed to "understand" even were the disabilities were a problem. He seemed to just know and treat Danny "differently".
To tell you the truth I feel sad that he isn't here. I miss him greatly.

But I also miss the good weather and having time away from the stress here. I want to take DH to Spain and wish I could stay there for 3-6 months. I can;t cope with the needs of the boys anymore. Ben lives on his own he has his own care givers now and his own 2 dogs to care for. He is 25yrs old and yet still I find I have to constantly monitor everything.
Dan really needs to go into care full time but it is hard to "let go" or even find care for him.. Dh is ill again and i cannot deal with both. I am tired of getting nipped and bitten and plus it darn well hurts. I have scars all up my arms and it's no fun. I am tired of caring! I want to have some time to feel cared for! At least my big old Dog used to do that.

I cannot go to spain and get a big Dog. - But getting a big Dog wont bring my mate back either. Maybe I will just have to be content with the Giz and get DH well and see what happens.
Spain calls to me a lot when the kids play up. Sometimes I just want to run away! At least when I walked the dog - it was Time out!

Oes
 
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