Sleep talking! Post your looniest statements...

[lovesduckies]

Quote:

 

[cmjust0]

Quote:
My mom woke up once to the sound of my brother sleep-peeing into a box fan.. Not through a box fan, mind you...into a box fan. Or perhaps I should say, against a box fan..

We've yet to understand how he wasn't awoken by the spray.



Then there was the time my mom awoke to the sound of my brother screaming his fool head off that there was someone in the house and that he was being attacked. When she came into the room, I had him in a choke hold.. She thought we were both sleep-whatever-ing, but was disappointed to realize that I was actually full-on awake.

I just wanted him to SHUT UP.



And then a cousin of mine sleep-pee'd into the crisper drawer of their fridge. That sounds weird enough, but weirder still is the fact that the culprit cousin is a she.

Seems like the chill would have woken her up...but no.

 

[chickabator]

my dh said he wanted to go play and he told me he couldn't cause his chain was broke on his bike.

 

[TennesseeTruly]

Until 2 months ago, my husband was sleep walking/talking due to a medication he was on. It was also making him become violent with me during these sleep episodes, so much so that I alerted my friends and family that if something happened to me in my sleep, it was NOT because he tried to hurt me but because of the medication he was on.

Anyway, some of the funny things that he has said/done:

Sitting bolt upright and start searching through the bed. When asked what he was doing, he said he was gathering furniture to donate to GoodWill.
"In our bed?" "Where else would it be?"

After finding my husband, in his birthday suit crawling on the kitchen floor...."Dear, what are you doing?" Him: "Picking up these darn wooden spoons! Who keeps throwing them all over the floor?" (there were no spoons on the floor and this was 4am.)

After finding him going out the back door at 2:30am, again in his birthday suit, in the middle of February. "STEVEN! Where do you think you're going?"
Him: "I have to finish cutting the wood for the chicken coop."

He's now off the medication after I awoke one night to him punching me in the face. He broke down in tears when I woke him up. The next day we went to the doctors and had them take him off the medication. The doctor said that the medication was sometimes known to break down the blocks that keep you from acting out your dreams.

We haven't had one episode since.

But the story I can tell about some of his funny antics and saying.

Laurie

 

[LarryPQ]

In case no one has pointed it out:
http://www.sleeptalkinman.blogspot.com/

WARNING! This poor man's subconcious has 3 personalities, and 1 is a POTTY MOUTH! Funny, but a potty mouth.

My siggy line contains one of his quotes, but my favs are:

"Ninjas in stilettos. Fashion assassins! Not so stealthy, but oh so stylish!"
"Going to husband school. Yeah. Always having to do better. The teacher's a wench and there's no chance of graduating."

 

[OccamsTazer]

Quote:
I am so glad you posted that, I was afraid to!
I used to doubt the veracity of some of the things she posts, they're just so nutty.
Then DH went off about painting elephants, and I believe her now.

 

[LarryPQ]

If I were his wife, he would have been slapped a few times

My DSs will occasionally sleeptalk...my favorite was when one was 3 and he said, (starting really quietly)

"carscarsCarsCarsCARSCARSCARSCARSCARS!!!!!!...................*cars*...."

 

[shadowpaints]

my favorite if my hubbys is

'we need to get the car so we can dig graves'

when asked why, he said 'i dunno i think we could make some money that way tho'


he has told me that he doesnt want to sleep in a tent, he would rather sleep in a canoe LOL

 

[OccamsTazer]

Yeah, Sleeptalkinman's wife is seriously patient. I'm not of a very prickly temperament, but some of the things he says...whooo boy.

Remember that cool bee thread awhile back where the guy posted pictures of his bee swarm removals?
I was showing DH that thread one evening before bed, and we were oooh and aaah over the great photographs.
Later that night he mumbled, "hmm...many bees...many many many many bees bees..."

So at least one of these occurrences is BYC-derived!

 

[elijahboy]

well i get teased atleast once a month for mine
i was sound asleep and let one rip and immediately sat up and said who did that and laid back down sound asleep again and my boyfriend has to tell everyone

unfortuatelty my ex's brother was shot in the head in fla on memorial day and he called me at 4 am and told me and me being sound asleep i said ok what do you want me to do about it i know it was bad