Tattoo Wanted - Wife Objects.... What Do Ya Think?

[Wolf-Kim]

LMAO

If you think women can't hold grudges well enough by themselves.

Go ahead and get that big bold piece of artwork permanently painted across your tummy and remind your wife what you did, EVERY single she sees you without your shirt!!!

It would be a constant reminder, and heaven help if is stretches, dulls, or distorts in any many, it'd be the ultimate "I told you so" piece EVER.

 

[Wildsky]

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You have to look at the other side as well. If you did get a big fat ugly tattoo done, would your man kick you out the house forever?

Or if he ran off and got some darn ugly tattoo - would you throw him out forever and see a lawyer?

If you answered YES, then the whole relationship needs to be looked at really closely.

If a person was in an accident and became disfigured, or lost a limb - then what? Just because a tattoo is not an accident, doens't make that much difference - its what the other person really wants! and that counts.

 

[Wolf-Kim]

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You have to look at the other side as well. If you did get a big fat ugly tattoo done, would your man kick you out the house forever?

Or if he ran off and got some darn ugly tattoo - would you throw him out forever and see a lawyer?

If you answered YES, then the whole relationship needs to be looked at really closely.

If a person was in an accident and became disfigured, or lost a limb - then what? Just because a tattoo is not an accident, doens't make that much difference - its what the other person really wants! and that counts.

Oh no. The relationship is considerably more important than the artwork, regardless of whether it is done or not. If my husband went out and got one, would I disown him. Nope. Would I be upset that he asked for my approval, then when he didn't get it, he went out and did it anyway. You sure betcha.

The issue in question, really isn't the tattoo, in my opinion. It's the trust and understanding of the relationship. If he really truly wants that tattoo, and she's understanding, she'll let him get it. Flipside is, if he treasures his relationship, he'll be open and truthful with his wife, and not run around behind her back and do something she disaproves of.

I also see a big difference between the tattoos and bodily disfigurement. A tattoo, is something the person has asked to have and was dissaproved, and they went and had it done anyway, but bodily disfigurement? That is usually uncontrollable and neither party wanted to happen.

It's not an issue about the tattoo, but the relationship. If my husband were to ask, and I said no, and he went out and did it anyway, would it ruin our relationship completely? No. But if he did it often enough, it would prove to me that he could care less about my opinion and was going to do what he wanted to do regardless what I had to say about it. What kind of relationship is that?

 

[BeccaOH]

I really don't get the appeal of tattoos on anyone.

But, if you must, take a black Sharpie marker and write the word on your belly as you wish it to be inked. Try it out for a week and see how you and the wife really like it. Then decide if it is truly worth having for the rest of your life.

 

[Buff Hooligans]

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That's a great idea Becca!

 

[Wolf-Kim]

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Have you ever tried to do this? It's really hard! LOL

I tried to Sharpie an armband on my husband back when we were dating and it turned out "okay". It really does take a lot of artistic skill. We managed to pull it off and totally FREAK OUT his parents and brothers, which was the whole reason for it. His mom didn't think it was near as funny as we did.

 

[Chickenmaven]

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My DH has a keg instead of a 6 pack, too. So, I cannot imagine the 'look' you are going for.

 

[Chicky Tocks]

Well hmm....my DH is the anti-tattoo/piercing fuddy duddy in the house. I once freaked him into a tailspin just by wearing a clip on navel ring and flashing it at him(intentionally cause I'm bad like that).

But I would have to say that if he were not physically attracted to me because of something that I did to my body, then the relationship would suffer. And that goes for him too. I'm not talking about weight or age matters, but if something physically repulsed me like say....he started wearing fish-hooks in his nipples, then i wouldn't be able to look at him with his shirt off without gagging and thereby doing so he wouldn't be fishing with them in this pond.

 

[Dar]

The whole idea of "allowed" to and I am not "allowed" to do something is all foreign to me

Let DH "TRY" to tell me I am not "ALLOWED" to do something... he will be the one sleeping in the chicken coop not me!

I am in a marriage NOT an ownership agreement

If the bills are paid and there is food on the table and you have a few hundred bucks left at the end of the month then go for it

 

[Wolf-Kim]

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So you don't ask your husband to do anything?

Would you actively do something to annoy, turn him off, or generally something he doesn't like?

I mean we all have relationships that work differently. Maybe mine with my husband is just strange. We usually ask eachother if something is okay with the other, as we would not want to purposely do something to offend the other. It's not ownership, just courtesy to us.

If I'm watching TV in the bedroom and he wants to play xbox, he asks. If I want to add more animals, I ask. Most of the time the other person agrees, but our opinion truly counts towards the other. If I say "No, I wanted to watch this" then he'll wait until it's over. If there's something I want to watch and he's playing he'll usually say "can it wait until this match is over, and I'll say either yes or I'd rather it not." Don't walk into a room and "tell" my husband that I'm going to watch tv "now", just as he doesn't walk into the room and demand that I relinquish the television. We simply ask and listen to eachother.

Then again, I suppose it depends on how much something means to someone. I wouldn't decide that the bedroom is going to be hot pink without asking my husband. I would especially do it after I asked and he said he'd strongly prefer it NOT to be hot pink. To me, it would just seem like I totally blew off his opinion and did what I wanted to do.

Not trying to offend, just trying to understand how different people make different relationships work.

-Kim