The Evolution of Atlas: A Breeding (and Chat) Thread

[getaclue]

Yes, it's your right to know, and I didn't mean to imply otherwise. I was just giving a couple other examples, nothing more. Agreeing that sometimes you don't want to get close to any of them, just because the DNA might match.

 

[speckledhen]

Yes, it's your right to know, and I didn't mean to imply otherwise. I was just giving a couple other examples, nothing more. Agreeing that sometimes you don't want to get close to any of them, just because the DNA might match.

I know you weren't implying anything, just wanted to say I feel differently than your brother. In a way, I understand his thinking. You never know what you'll find when you open this can of worms. But, if you steel yourself and decide that it's informational and may be pertinent to your health, depending on how much detail you find, it helps justify the search. Not that it needs justification. If my adoptive father had not withheld the information and had me banging my head against brick walls searching without even a surname, I might have found my mother before she died and eased her mind that I was okay and that I had a decent life.

 

[Leahs Mom]

If I were your mother, I believe it would have set my mind at ease to know my daughter was okay.

I can't imagine anything worse than thinking I had done something that hurt one of my children and that there is nothing I could do about it.

 

[speckledhen]

If I were your mother, I believe it would have set my mind at ease to know my daughter was okay.

I can't imagine anything worse than thinking I had done something that hurt one of my children and that there is nothing I could do about it.

Then, you can imagine how I feel knowing that my father robbed me of that. After my adoptive mother died, he just one day handed me my original adoption papers, which I'd never seen. Right on there, it said "Baby Fuller". I was floored, after all the years of him acting like he didn't know that, I could not understand. Did he forget? Did he just block it out? And why did he give them to me then and, not my sister, according to her? She was also adopted but from a different family in TN. If he'd let me know this sooner, I could have located her. But, it is what it is. I guess I know more than I might have, though I would still like to know if my biological father was that no-good Westberry or Bobby Fuller. This is why I'd rather it be Bobby. He seemed to have honor and family loyalty, something the Westberrys lack.

 

[speckledhen]

And, back to chickens, or chicken poop on the porch, anyway.

Hahaha, I need these:

 

[1muttsfan]

When my sister was in college, but still a teenager, she had a baby who's father was a casual relationship. She gave the baby up for adoption. After she had the baby I went to the nursery in the hospital to see him. The nurses were reluctant to show him to me, thinking maybe I was a creepy stalker type, but he is my nephew and I just wanted to see him one time.
My sister has told me she does not want to have a relationship with him, but I think she would change her mind if presented with an actual person. I have always hoped he has had a good and happy life, and would quite like to meet him someday. To me he is as much my family as any of my nieces and nephew.

 

[getaclue]

When one of my cousins was young, she got pregnant. Her mother made the arrangements to have the baby given up for adoption. Fast forward 35 years, and my cousin finally found the daughter she gave up. The daughter was placed in a good home, had a good life, with parents that love her. She's part of my cousin's family now too.

 

[speckledhen]

When my sister was in college, but still a teenager, she had a baby who's father was a casual relationship. She gave the baby up for adoption. After she had the baby I went to the nursery in the hospital to see him. The nurses were reluctant to show him to me, thinking maybe I was a creepy stalker type, but he is my nephew and I just wanted to see him one time.
My sister has told me she does not want to have a relationship with him, but I think she would change her mind if presented with an actual person. I have always hoped he has had a good and happy life, and would quite like to meet him someday. To me he is as much my family as any of my nieces and nephew.

When one of my cousins was young, she got pregnant. Her mother made the arrangements to have the baby given up for adoption. Fast forward 35 years, and my cousin finally found the daughter she gave up. The daughter was placed in a good home, had a good life, with parents that love her. She's part of my cousin's family now too.

I commend them both for choosing adoption. My mother had several miscarriages and was in her late 30's before adopting me, then my sister (who is not related to me). Unless someone is adopted and has that mystery hanging over them, they just don't understand the emotions that go with all that. Mary, you understand it from the other side, to a degree, having a nephew that you could not see grow up. At least, Cheryl, your family was reunited with the baby your cousin gave up and know she had a good life.

When they ask for family history at the doctor, I can't say anything with certainty. Both grandparents and my mother were alcoholics. Even Westberry was an alcoholic, according to his oldest son. My sister had retinal cancer, which, according to Bobby's cousin, was in remission when she died, which made her sudden death at 49 very suspicious. But, they lived a different life than I did, most things were self-inflicted, IMO. I won't die of liver cancer, the result of cirrhosis of the liver, that my own mother did at 53 years old. I've already outlived them all, by age. But, it would be nice to know more, in case there were genetic issues.

Need I add that back in the 50's, I could have been a coat-hanger abortion? I'm glad to have had a life, period! I hope someone on this planet is glad I did, too. My sons would not exist and my husband would have had a different wife, and as I tell him, been divorced because who else could live with him? LOL.

 

[1muttsfan]

While I feel sad that we lost my nephew to an unknown life, it would be futile to let it ruin mine. My sister did what she felt was best for both of them, and we did not question her decision. Maybe someday he will come forth with the same questions you have now. If so I would be very happy.
You do not have to genetic test a sibling, I think even cousins or other close relatives would do. Maybe there is someone in those families that feels like I do, and would like to know you. The only way to know is to ask- you have nothing to loose.

 

[speckledhen]

While I feel sad that we lost my nephew to an unknown life, it would be futile to let it ruin mine. My sister did what she felt was best for both of them, and we did not question her decision. Maybe someday he will come forth with the same questions you have now. If so I would be very happy.
You do not have to genetic test a sibling, I think even cousins or other close relatives would do. Maybe there is someone in those families that feels like I do, and would like to know you. The only way to know is to ask- you have nothing to loose.

Well, we have put forth the idea to my Fuller cousin, Elizabeth, who is, well, a little weird in some ways. What the problem is with that, I feel, is will the Fullers think I want this because they won the lawsuit against Cuba? They may think I want in on that somehow. Maybe that and the fact that they all believe I am Westberry's kid is why they have not offered to do a DNA test with me. I bet Westberry, Jr would do one, but I'm leery of getting involved with him in particular.

When I met Lynita and she met Janet Weininger, she had no inclination to sue Cuba. She had no real relationship with her father, him dying so early in her life, but had this vague idea that if he had lived, her life would have been better and then, seeing that Janet Weininger had a lawsuit for her wounded father's execution during the Bay of Pigs, she decided to start her own. They say Bobby had limited contact with Lynita when he was alive. I mean, he was a teenager when she was born, so you know how that goes, forced to marry this girl who had his baby-someone told me they didn't even live together afterward.

Then, Lynita set out to plan her big log home exactly where I am living now. She had huge plans for her husband to quit working (he was a diver for the county) and travel when they won the suit. I had no idea about any of this when I set out to find my family, of course. I mean, her husband's cousin actually built a house a few streets over from us, already owned land here. Odd, odd coincidence that they were already planning to live here and I had no idea. She started the suit the year we found this place, if I recall.

Picture of Bobby with my sister:
View attachment 1180074

Bobby and my mother, who dyed her hair platinum blonde, ala Marilyn Monroe. In that first photo, he looks like a young Bobby Kennedy to me. She looks very different at different times.