The Night of the Mare

[human1]

Sorry everyone. I've been extremely busy lately but this is what I have done of chapter two so far. Not much, and I'm not very proud of it but whatever

Spoiler: Chapter 2

Chap. 2


A few minutes later, to Livvy’s relief, Jet reappeared. He was trotting alongside the goats across from her. Livvy tried to keep her mind focused on what she was doing, but for some reason she felt really sleepy. She stumbled a few times and everything was blurry for a moment. “Jet,” she called weakly, “Jet, come here.” Luckily, Jet heard her weak voice above the roaring of the wind, and trotted over. Livvy grabbed on to his large neck and dragged herself up. “Jet, help...help me…” suddenly the world started spinning, and everything turned green, then yellow, then black. And that was all she remembered.

When she woke up, she was alone. She was freezing cold and couldn’t remember anything. She tried to move but she felt stiff. Just as things were coming back to her, she heard a fierce growl coming from above. She looked up, to see a strange, black, dog like animal looking over the edge of a cliff at her. It was about 10 feet up. “Jet?” she asked weakly. “Is that you, Jet?”

Suddenly her eyes focused and she came back to reality. It was not Jet. It was not Jada. It was a wolf! The black wolf growled again. Livvy knew it was hungry. What she didn’t know was where Zada and Jet and the goats were. “Maybe the wolves already ate them!” Livvy worried. Suddenly a shadow fell upon her, and she froze. “This is it,” she thought helplessly. “There is nothing I can do to save myself.” She opened her eyes for what she thought would be the last time. She exclaimed in surprise. “Jet!”

Jet barked at the wolf and showed his large fangs. He had his tail high in the air. The wolf eyed him for a minute before slowly giving up and drifting off up the mountain. To Livvy’s surprise, it hadn’t been a pack, but only a hungry loner who couldn’t do any harm with Jet protecting her. “Jet,” she said softly. “I don’t think I can ever repay you for what you’ve done.”

Jet tugged at her jacket and growled impatiently as if to say “are you coming?”. Livvy was still freezing cold but she managed to get to her feet by holding onto Jet. Jet slowly walked her up the little hill and back onto the trail. To Livvy’s amazement there stood Zada and all of the goats. “Wow. These dogs are amazing!” she thought, filled with joy and relief.
Livvy and the animals pushed their way up the mountain. “The ledge should be around here somewhere.” she said out loud. “Oh! There it is. Finally!” She cried. “Zap them, Zada!” she called. With her last bit of strength, she crawled under the ledge and fell asleep.

Remember this isn't all of it and it needs a lot of work.

it's all right, dont feel pressured about it
we all need to relax soemtimes

 

[AntiqueB]

I just found this thread! This is a great story so far! I can't wait to read more!!

Thank you so much for posting it for everyone to read and enjoy.

 

[cluckmecoop7]

thanks both

 

[arwoon]

Chapter 1


“Why are goats so messy?” complained 14 year old Olivia to herself as she spread hay on the floor of the shed. “And they are so hard to care for in winter. Why do we have goats anyway?”

Although she was only complaining to herself, her older sister Kayla overheard.

“The goats help us a lot.” Kayla commented as she swept the floor. “Don’t you like fresh milk for breakfast every morning? And what about the cheese and soap Mom makes? I think they are quite useful.”

“Well….” Olivia reluctantly agreed. “I guess. But still, if you had to care for these goats every morning you would hate it, too.”

“You hate it?”

“I guess that wasn’t the right word. Maybe ‘dislike’ or ‘detest’ is a better word.”

“Yes, that’s better. But still, I don’t think you dislike taking care of them. Maybe you got up on the wrong side of the bed.” Kayla suggested with a grin.

“Maybe,” laughed Livvy, “but I don’t think so. I’m just tired of these goats.”

* * *

At dinner time that evening, Dad had important news. “I need everyone's attention for a few minutes.” He declared. He waited until everyone had taken their usual seats, then began. “As you all know, we are going to have a large storm tomorrow. But the thing you don’t know is this: The storm has turned into the largest storm we’ve ever had in the history of our state.” He paused, and everyone waited respectfully for him to go on. “Olivia, I’m going to need you for a very important task,” he continued.

Olivia jumped at the mention of her name. “Wha- what?” She asked, slightly confused.

“Olivia, I’m going to need you to bring the goats up to the Lexi Sky Beach Trail and stay with them under the rock ledge on the mountain tomorrow. You will probably have to stay overnight. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

“Yes….yes, I understand.” Olivia was a little dazed.

“You will have to start early tomorrow morning.” Dad continued. “It’s not going to be easy, but I trust you will be able to handle everything.”


Early the next morning, Livvy got up. It was still dark, and very cold. She shivered as she brushed her teeth and got ready for the day. The night before Mom had laid out a warm coat and overalls for her to wear when she was with the goats. There was also a bag with enough food for lunch and dinner.

Quietly Livvy put on her outdoor clothes. She also put on a cozy hat and a pair of green cotton gloves. She jumped when she felt a tap on her shoulder.

“Oops, sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you!” It was Dad. “I just wanted to make sure you were ready before you left.”

“I’m okay.” Livvy replied. “Just a little nervous about today.”

“I can understand that,” Dad said as he gave her a hug. “I’m a little worried about you, but I’m sure you will be alright. You see, I’m only sending you because I need all the older ones for things around here. And Elly is much too little for this kind of responsibility.”

“Don’t worry Dad, I think I’ll be fine.”

“Good luck and please stay safe.” With that Dad went back upstairs.

Livvy took a deep breath, then opened the door and went out. The wind was already picking up. “I better hurry.” Livvy decided as she floundered through a few feet of snow. “And Dad said it’s going to start snowing again soon!”

After a quick prayer for safety and courage, she opened the goats barn door. Zada and Jet, the guard dogs, jumped up eagerly to greet her. “Yes, yes. Hi! I’m happy to see you, too.” The excited dogs made her feel a little better.

Zada was a 1 ½ year old Australian Shepherd and her job was to herd and round up the goats. She was sometimes used for herding calves as well.

Jet was a German Shepherd/Great pyrenees mix. He was a great guard dog, and Livvy knew he would be a large comfort on the mountain.
“Let’s go.” she told the excited dogs. “Zada, go zap them!” she encouraged as the dog ran around, spraying snow everywhere. When Zada was a puppy, the family had trained her that “zap them” meant getting the goats to move forward.

As the group started up the dirt road to the mountain, Livvy counted everyone. “They’re all here.” she sighed, “At least, for now.” she added worriedly.

Jet bounded ahead while Zada stayed behind, weaving in and out of the goats and keeping order in the herd. Livvy walked beside the lead goat and tried not to worry about what might happen.
About half an hour later the snow started falling. Large flakes drifted lazily downward at first, but soon they turned to small, icy pellets that stung her face and neck. She re-wrapped her scarf around her neck and squinted her eyes. The icy snow pellets swirling and blowing even harder as the wind picked up! Zada was panting like crazy as she kept the goats in order. “Good girl, Zada! Keep it up!” Livvy yelled, but the wind carried her words away and she didn’t even know if Zada had heard her or not. Livvy then realized she had lost sight of Jet. “He’s fine.” she told herself. “At least I think.”

The end of Chapter 1

That's awesome!!

 

[TheTexasChickenGirl]

Hello all!

I've been a little timid to share this with you all, but I think the time has come. I'm writing a chapter book, and I'd like people to help me out with suggestions, ideas, and editing. Please be honest. I want this to be a good book in the end. Also, please point out spelling mistakes.

About:

Olivia is 14 years old. She and her family live on a homestead. Olivia (who's nickname is Livvy) is responsible for the goats, although she doesn't enjoy the job. One night at dinner Dad tells the family that the largest storm the state has ever had in history is about to hit them directly. Livvy is trusted to take the goats up on the mountain and fend for herself overnight. With the company of two dogs, Zada and Jet, will Livvy survive in the storm?

[ I'll post the first part in a few minutes ]

Spoiler: Please read

NO COPYWRITING! This is MY idea for MY book. Thank you!

Watching! I love the story so far and the plot line!

 

[cluckmecoop7]

Thanks!

 

[Lacy Duckwing]

Sorry everyone. I've been extremely busy lately but this is what I have done of chapter two so far. Not much, and I'm not very proud of it but whatever

Spoiler: Chapter 2

Chap. 2


A few minutes later, to Livvy’s relief, Jet reappeared. He was trotting alongside the goats across from her. Livvy tried to keep her mind focused on what she was doing, but for some reason she felt really sleepy. She stumbled a few times and everything was blurry for a moment. “Jet,” she called weakly, “Jet, come here.” Luckily, Jet heard her weak voice above the roaring of the wind, and trotted over. Livvy grabbed on to his large neck and dragged herself up. “Jet, help...help me…” suddenly the world started spinning, and everything turned green, then yellow, then black. And that was all she remembered.

When she woke up, she was alone. She was freezing cold and couldn’t remember anything. She tried to move but she felt stiff. Just as things were coming back to her, she heard a fierce growl coming from above. She looked up, to see a strange, black, dog like animal looking over the edge of a cliff at her. It was about 10 feet up. “Jet?” she asked weakly. “Is that you, Jet?”

Suddenly her eyes focused and she came back to reality. It was not Jet. It was not Jada. It was a wolf! The black wolf growled again. Livvy knew it was hungry. What she didn’t know was where Zada and Jet and the goats were. “Maybe the wolves already ate them!” Livvy worried. Suddenly a shadow fell upon her, and she froze. “This is it,” she thought helplessly. “There is nothing I can do to save myself.” She opened her eyes for what she thought would be the last time. She exclaimed in surprise. “Jet!”

Jet barked at the wolf and showed his large fangs. He had his tail high in the air. The wolf eyed him for a minute before slowly giving up and drifting off up the mountain. To Livvy’s surprise, it hadn’t been a pack, but only a hungry loner who couldn’t do any harm with Jet protecting her. “Jet,” she said softly. “I don’t think I can ever repay you for what you’ve done.”

Jet tugged at her jacket and growled impatiently as if to say “are you coming?”. Livvy was still freezing cold but she managed to get to her feet by holding onto Jet. Jet slowly walked her up the little hill and back onto the trail. To Livvy’s amazement there stood Zada and all of the goats. “Wow. These dogs are amazing!” she thought, filled with joy and relief.
Livvy and the animals pushed their way up the mountain. “The ledge should be around here somewhere.” she said out loud. “Oh! There it is. Finally!” She cried. “Zap them, Zada!” she called. With her last bit of strength, she crawled under the ledge and fell asleep.

Remember this isn't all of it and it needs a lot of work.

LOVE IT!!!!
Just one thing, why'd she faint? Did she faint from exhaustion? Did she faint because of how high she was? Or am I just missing something from the first chapter? Or- is this going to tell itself as the story goes on? I hope you don't mind me asking. I'm just a little curious.

 

[cluckmecoop7]

The story will tell. That was just the first part of the chapter.

 

[Lacy Duckwing]

The story will tell. That was just the first part of the chapter.

Ok.

 

[Happy hen lover]

Sorry everyone. I've been extremely busy lately but this is what I have done of chapter two so far. Not much, and I'm not very proud of it but whatever

Spoiler: Chapter 2

Chap. 2


A few minutes later, to Livvy’s relief, Jet reappeared. He was trotting alongside the goats across from her. Livvy tried to keep her mind focused on what she was doing, but for some reason she felt really sleepy. She stumbled a few times and everything was blurry for a moment. “Jet,” she called weakly, “Jet, come here.” Luckily, Jet heard her weak voice above the roaring of the wind, and trotted over. Livvy grabbed on to his large neck and dragged herself up. “Jet, help...help me…” suddenly the world started spinning, and everything turned green, then yellow, then black. And that was all she remembered.

When she woke up, she was alone. She was freezing cold and couldn’t remember anything. She tried to move but she felt stiff. Just as things were coming back to her, she heard a fierce growl coming from above. She looked up, to see a strange, black, dog like animal looking over the edge of a cliff at her. It was about 10 feet up. “Jet?” she asked weakly. “Is that you, Jet?”

Suddenly her eyes focused and she came back to reality. It was not Jet. It was not Jada. It was a wolf! The black wolf growled again. Livvy knew it was hungry. What she didn’t know was where Zada and Jet and the goats were. “Maybe the wolves already ate them!” Livvy worried. Suddenly a shadow fell upon her, and she froze. “This is it,” she thought helplessly. “There is nothing I can do to save myself.” She opened her eyes for what she thought would be the last time. She exclaimed in surprise. “Jet!”

Jet barked at the wolf and showed his large fangs. He had his tail high in the air. The wolf eyed him for a minute before slowly giving up and drifting off up the mountain. To Livvy’s surprise, it hadn’t been a pack, but only a hungry loner who couldn’t do any harm with Jet protecting her. “Jet,” she said softly. “I don’t think I can ever repay you for what you’ve done.”

Jet tugged at her jacket and growled impatiently as if to say “are you coming?”. Livvy was still freezing cold but she managed to get to her feet by holding onto Jet. Jet slowly walked her up the little hill and back onto the trail. To Livvy’s amazement there stood Zada and all of the goats. “Wow. These dogs are amazing!” she thought, filled with joy and relief.
Livvy and the animals pushed their way up the mountain. “The ledge should be around here somewhere.” she said out loud. “Oh! There it is. Finally!” She cried. “Zap them, Zada!” she called. With her last bit of strength, she crawled under the ledge and fell asleep.

Remember this isn't all of it and it needs a lot of work.

I liked it , suspenseful.