On the name thing -
I did the conventional thing when DH and I got married, and changed my name to his. I was young (22), had no history to speak of, and to have done otherwise just seemed to be more trouble than it was worth. Both his last name and my maiden name are a bit unusual (at least in this country); the two of them together on my driver's license looks like a bit of a train wreck! Before we were married, I joked that we were thinking about hyphenating them, but figured that would make us social pariahs because nobody would be able to pronounce it. It's a bit funny to be sitting in a waiting room, see the nurse/hygienist/whatever come out, look at the chart, say "Ms. . . . . . . and make a weak stab at it, or abandon the struggle and go with my first name - which is very common. In fact, growing up, there was almost always at least one other girl that had the same first name, and she was usually more popular than me. It got so I didn't really pay attention when I heard my name, because I figured they meant her, not me. Some folks wondered just how far off in lalaland I must be, not to even answer to my own name (or got really ill at me, thinking that I was deliberately ignoring them). And though I've signed my married name to countless checks and forms in the 29 years that I've been married, seeing "Mrs." in front of that name still makes me think of my MIL, not me!