Personally I don't think you need to explain your actions to anyone, it's your life and your kids. There is no one correct way to handle a situation and there is no reason for you to have to justify making the day run more smoothly. I'd ignore them and file them under "too obtuse to bother with" and go on about my life. They'll only get to you if you let them. Opinions are like arse-holes, as they say...everyone's got one.
I know what you're going through. I've got a 10 month old who has opinions and is going mobile and I have a very independent and active 2 year old. It is 10 times more work and more unpredictable to take them both out by myself than either one or the other. One is a breeze, 2 is exponentially more difficult when neither are old enough to reliably direct verbally. You've only got so many hands and I am with you, I am not one to constantly scream at my kids pretending to make them behave. They're babies, they explore, I never want to squash that inquisitiveness. However, it can get exhausting...like trying to herd cats, so I pick my battles and always stack the deck in my favor to avoid battles when able. Not only is it easier on me that way, it's less stress on the boys.
Let those unwanted opinions roll off your back, it's only making your life miserable. They can only hurt you if you let them. If it wasn't that, they'd find something else to pick at. It's not worth the stress. Who cares what they think, anyway. You've got beautiful kids, all is right with the world.
One of my favorite sayings - "I don't know what their problem is, I like me just fine."
My techs call it the "Hurley Bubble". It works for me, especially in the choas that can occur at an emergency/specialty facility. But hey, in my bubble all is right in my little universe, got my boys, got my hubby, my chickies, my dogs, my snakes, my acreage. The rest of that stuff can't touch me.
It'll only get to you if you let it.
