Witnessed A Vandalism CLOSE-UP (UPDATE Post# 116)

[CarolJ]

Sometimes kids that age do stupid things - peer pressure and all that. I wouldn't press charges, but they would have to replace the mailboxes & apologize individually to each person affected. Maybe do some other community service. I know from the experience of raising two kids who are now wonderful and responsible adults that a brush with the law can scare the shenanigans out of some teenagers. Maybe not all of them - but enough that it's worth giving them another chance.

 

[lishah2000]

I would press charges and hopefully the other neighbors would also do the same so not one person is a target.

Wish my nephew had to pay for his crimes the first few times. Maybe he would have learned a lesson before getting into trouble time and time again. Each time bigger and bigger crimes. Honestly he never has REALLY paid for his crimes. Each time the charges were reduced or dropped and he has never owned up to the things he has done. He is now a grown man, still acting like a 14 year old and will probably never go anywhere but further and further downhill.

I never did anything as a teenager because I knew my parents would have left me in jail. No doubt.

 

[mfuqua]

I worked with behavior disordered teens for 30 years. They know exactly what they did and need to be held accountable. Them, not their parents. The behaviors these 18 yr olds exhibited don't sound like a one time deal. Perhaps they should be asked what they think they deserve to see just how they react. They may be harder on themselves than the police in your area. Just a thought.

 

[PotterWatch]

I think the problem I have with leaving up to the parents rather than the court system, is that too many parents wouldn't really do anything. I have a neighbor who still thinks that her oldest son really is a good kid even though he is serving prison time right now and was most likely one of the people who broke into our home last year. She bailed him out several times from petty stuff and told people that she made certain he knew what he did was wrong and that he "paid" for it at home. In reality, the only people who "paid" for it were the ones he continued to commit crimes against. He started out with little vandalism stuff as well. Tagging, egging, etc. Then went on to bigger stuff since he never had any real consequences for the little stuff.

 

[pipdzipdnreadytogo]

Let me just say that this was not 'just a mailbox'. This was around 10 mailboxes, and a fridge, and who knows how much more. On top of that, how much do you have to beat on a fridge to DESTROY it? Not to mention the fact that mail and bits of the boxes were flying because of how violently they were beating on them! Just think of they were spooked by OP yelling at them and they turned it on her! They were obviously violent enough to scare OP into hiding and fearing for her safety!

At any rate, whether it'll 'ruin their lives' or not, they should have known it was wrong and they should have known there would be consequences if they were caught. Just because they're 'just kids' (though three were 18) doesn't mean they get a pass on comitting a crime in such a violent way. They should have known better than to do it in the first place and so they should be punished accordingly. I say press charges and if you're worried about them taking out some revenge, keep a gun handy by your bed or by the door, somewhere that's easy access for you.

By the way, I'm 20 as of a few days ago, I was 18 not too long ago, and even before that I knew better than to vandalize others' property or even my parents' / my own property. It isn't right no matter who owns it, no matter what your age is, no matter who your friends are, no matter what your last name is. That's common sense at that age (even for the 14yo).

 

[cassie]

Quote:
I would press charges so fast it would make their heads swim. For one thing, fooling with the mail is a federal offense. Secondly, if youthful offenders get nailed early for petty crimes, it takes a lot of the fun out of it and they are less likely to go on to more serious stuff. Too many youngsters don't get the opportunity to learn there are consequences for one's actions, and everybody ends up the loser. Including the offenders.

 

[Wisher1000]

Laurajean,

I am a Mom to three boys and a police officer.

First, our local post office/federal govt won't fool with pressing felony charges in that situation. I would ask for a "damage to property" or vandalism type report which is a misdemeanor. Remember that if the boys have or have not been in trouble (or at least been caught) before the court will be able to access that information. It is difficult to enforce any type of service or restitution without a conviction. Talk to the parents. You will be able to tell what type of "nuts" the kids are by talking to the "tree." Don't make any promises and don't even tell them which way you are leaning. Remember, also that a kid can petition the court to have his record sealed until 25 years of age (it is not done automatically.) Likewise, even if found guilty, the kid can apply for youthful offender and it is normally granted except if their records are violent or extensive. If it were my kids, I would agree to have the kids do manual labor at your property in exchange for your not pressing charges. It would be done at your convenience and to your satisfaction. I would further understand that you have one year to press charges (although it gets tougher to get a conviction if you wait.) Talk to the judge of jurisdiction and see what is the standard way of handling this type case, you may be able to work something out where the boys appear in court, provide service and restitution AND still have no blemish on their records. You make the decision, but DO NOT feel like you are ruining their lives, you are not. Truthfully, neither have they. It is a great opportunity for a life lesson that it seems these boys could use. Whether the lesson is learned through court or through other means is the real question. I would try to determine how that lesson is best learned. Good luck, it's a tough decision to make.

 

[cassie]

Quote:
Ummm. Maybe if they had gotten nailed for their first offenses they wouldn't have gone on to the second, third, and fourth. And the sojourn to the big house would have been prevented. My parents made it real clear that if we did something so stupid as to get ourselves locked up in jail, don't bother calling in the middle of the night for someone to come bail us out. We were told if we could find our way into jail, we could find our way out.

 

[aubreynoramarie]

One morning my boyfriend and I woke up to find that the back window of his van had been shot out and there was glass everywhere. Looking up and down the street it took only a second to realize that the perp had shot out every back window of every car up the street. I was so livid that someone could cause so much damage and really it's only just "kids being kids".

The news that night reported that over 400 windows had been shot out that night and those were only the amount of police reports that had been filed at that point.

Well, "kids being kids" they were eventually caught because kids can't keep their stinking traps shut when they think they did something cool. They tell all of their friends.

So were at the drug store one night and we run into this kid that my boyfriend knows. He's 18 or 19. Anyways the kid starts bragging about all this trouble he got in blah blah blah and I shot out a ton of car windows!

My boyfriend literally had to hold me back so I wouldnt gie the kid a permanent shiner.


I guess the point is that at 18 yrs old you do know the difference between right and wrong and kids aren't doing vandalism to gain anything but bragging rights. I'd press charges for sure and teach them a lesson. Send the message that this is NOT okay. An apology won't suffice for an 18 year old kid! Really? Say sorry? No! You're 18! And if they don't have a job you will probobly never get reimbursed for your losses. The kid who busted out our windows pays like, 10 bucks a month to the court. At 200 dollars a window for over 400 cars I doubt we will ever get our reimbursement.

 

[aubreynoramarie]

And on top of that I hardly think that ten bucks a month really compensates for all of the headache he caused so many people.