You might be a “Southie” if...

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Well, I was born on a farm in NW Ohio, to immigrant parents (Irish and German) and raised there until I went of to college in Kansas. Entered the Army and every base I was at was in the South....Ft. Knox, Ft. McClellan, Ft. Campbell, Ft. Belvor (the farthest north as I got), and the best place of them all, Ft. Hood. But I did spend 6 months in the PA at The Gap (Indiantown Gap). That's about 15 years out of 21. You know that song that goes...."alllll my exes live in Texas"? Well, for me the next line is...."and that's whhhhy I live in Germannnny!" And you guessed it, she was from the north. North Dallas!
Dear god son, didn’t they warn you about them Dallas/Arlington girls. First thing my 1sgt said when I got to hood was, don’t you dare date, Fu$&k, or associate with girls from that area, they are all college chicks wanting a free ride, and not the ride you want to give them lol. So me being a smart ass asked, so the strippers down town are fair game, I’ll I Heard was get out of my office.
 
:confused: those boogers are expensive. And they smell bad if you forget and leave them in the car.

Think about those poor Southies without refrigeration, like we have up north, and what it smells like down there..


Kind of explains the weird odor we get on the days with southerly breezes.
 
One time my ex had dug up a coffee can full of night crawlers somewhere and stashed them in the shed fridge and forgot to tell me.
These things were so big they looked like little snakes! I don't care about someone stashing worms in the fridge... That's normal.
But if you put something that looks like it is from the movie tremmors in there....that's need to know news. I about wet myself when I opened that can.
 
One time my ex had dug up a coffee can full of night crawlers somewhere and stashed them in the shed fridge and forgot to tell me.
These things were so big they looked like little snakes! I don't care about someone stashing worms in the fridge... That's normal.
But if you put something that looks like it is from the movie tremmors in there....that's need to know news. I about wet myself when I opened that can.
Think about those poor Southies without refrigeration, like we have up north, and what it smells like down there..


Kind of explains the weird odor we get on the days with southerly breezes.
And I thought it was my neighbors sceptic System!😉
 
Found this on FB:

I could be a Blueneck on several of these items :)
Bluenecks: Northerners
(opposite of Rednecks)
YOU JUST MIGHT BE A BLUENECK IF...

- Instead of referring to two or more people as "Y'all," you call them "you guys," even if both of them are women.
- You think barbecue is a verb meaning "to cook outside."
- You think Heinz Ketchup is REALLY SPICY.
- You would never stop to buy something somebody was cooking on the side of the road.
- You don't have any problems pronouncing "Worcestershire sauce" correctly.
- You don't know what a moon pie is.
- You've never had an RC Cola.
- You've never, ever eaten okra -- fried, boiled, or pickled.
- You eat fried chicken with a knife and fork.
- You have no idea what a polecat is.
- You don't see anything wrong with putting a sweater on your dog.
- You don't have bangs.
- You would rather have your son become a lawyer than grow up to get his own TV fishing show.
- You've never eaten, and don't know how to make, a tomato sandwich.
- You think more money should go to important scientific research at your university than to pay the salary of the head football coach.
- You don't even have one can of WD-40 somewhere around the house.
- You don't have any hats in your closet that advertise feed stores.
- You don't know anyone with at least two first names (i.e., Joe Bob, Faye Ellen, Billy Ray, Mary Jo, Bubba Dean, Joe Dan, Mary Alice)
- You don't know any women with male names (i.e., Tommie, Bobbie, Johnnie, Jimmie)
- None of your fur coats are homemade.
 

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