Dad Jokes😂

[ShrekDawg]

Did you hear about the construction joke?

I’m still working on it.

 

[Hayden Goseek]

Me: I swear on my life.

Friend: I've seen your life. Swear on something else.

 

[Jester57]

A guy walked into the doctors office with water running down his chest and cascading off his shoulders.

It turned out he had a crick in his neck.

 

[Jester57]

Her: How can you eat these precious creatures?
View attachment 3960442

Him: Are you being rhetorical or are you asking for recipes?

My automatic response is “with bbq sauce”.

 

[BackroadGirl57]

I figured. I'd give the mimes a throat punch but there's someone else here who covers that for me.

I think I know who you're talking about

View attachment 3786749

I REMEMBER THAT EPISODE!!!! Data learned what dreaming was. And there were parasitic bug things that fed on cellular peptides eating everyone on the ship.

View attachment 3895791

View attachment 3938844

Those sound like something that would actually happen with these two though On the rare occasion Picard isn't serious.

View attachment 3939542

I really wonder what the real circumstances were with this one...

 

[ShrekDawg]

I like my ceiling. I know it’s not the best but it’s up there.

 

[ShrekDawg]

What did Vincent say when he lost his car in the parking lot?

Where did my Van Gogh?

 

[Jester57]

A naked man ran out into the freezing cold, covered only with live chickens. He was smart;

he dressed in layers.

 

[Hayden Goseek]

If a cow doesn't produce milk;

is it a Milk-Dud or an Udder Failure?

 

[ShrekDawg]

Why don’t vampires use autocorrect?

Because they love Type Os.