I expect my boys to do any chore that contributes to the household without even thoughts of getting paid. It isn't real life to get paid for activities of daily living. I want them to be as self-sufficient as possible when I turn them loose and be able to care for a family and maintain their own properties one day without getting nagged by the wife.
I also expect them to cook, even when I'm at home. My dad, from the old school of thought, was appalled that I made them do dishes....you can imagine what he said when I made them learn how to cook and make bread! They needed to see how much work it took to keep a variety of healthy meals on the table. Their future wife may get very ill or even pass away...I want them to be independent and not at a loss if, and when, this happens. Also doesn't hurt to be able to help out around the house on a regular basis anyway.
I also teach them general car maintenance and expect them to maintain the cars when they reach driving age...this is reality. If they are old enough to drive it, they should know how to repair, or maintain it. No money is involved with this learning experience, as in the real world the money flow for car maintenance is often in the opposite direction!
For over the top chores that are mainly to benefit me, I try to offer some money when I can. When I can't I don't worry about it. When they need money, I can give them some. When we sell something around here that has come from their hard work, they get their part of the profit.
My kids often feel slighted when other kids have new cars and money from their parents and wish that they could have the same. That is only natural when you're a kid. As an adult, my oldest son finally called me one day and said, "Mom, I'm so grateful you taught me how to cook, clean and do my own laundry....none of the guys in my apartment building knows how to do it correctly!"
They might not see the big picture when they are growing up, as we don't see God's big plan either, but one day they will be grateful for the experience and self-sufficiency they learned and have reasonable expectations about what you actually get paid for in this world. Some things pay you in more than money!
I also expect them to cook, even when I'm at home. My dad, from the old school of thought, was appalled that I made them do dishes....you can imagine what he said when I made them learn how to cook and make bread! They needed to see how much work it took to keep a variety of healthy meals on the table. Their future wife may get very ill or even pass away...I want them to be independent and not at a loss if, and when, this happens. Also doesn't hurt to be able to help out around the house on a regular basis anyway.
I also teach them general car maintenance and expect them to maintain the cars when they reach driving age...this is reality. If they are old enough to drive it, they should know how to repair, or maintain it. No money is involved with this learning experience, as in the real world the money flow for car maintenance is often in the opposite direction!
For over the top chores that are mainly to benefit me, I try to offer some money when I can. When I can't I don't worry about it. When they need money, I can give them some. When we sell something around here that has come from their hard work, they get their part of the profit.
My kids often feel slighted when other kids have new cars and money from their parents and wish that they could have the same. That is only natural when you're a kid. As an adult, my oldest son finally called me one day and said, "Mom, I'm so grateful you taught me how to cook, clean and do my own laundry....none of the guys in my apartment building knows how to do it correctly!"
They might not see the big picture when they are growing up, as we don't see God's big plan either, but one day they will be grateful for the experience and self-sufficiency they learned and have reasonable expectations about what you actually get paid for in this world. Some things pay you in more than money!
