Expectant parent club! Where the pregnant people hang out.

[SpringChickens]

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That's quite a nice dilemma to have!! I'm glad your placenta moved up and your doctor is giving you an option. Here's my opinion... women are meant to give birth naturally, and usually can if they put themselves in the right circumstances. There are definitely situations which demand a C-section (which, thank god, we have access to when necessary), but most women can deliver naturally if given the chance.

A C-section not only has a greater risk of complications for you AND your baby, it also makes your recover much more difficult and may limit the number of children you can/should have. Also, with each C-section you have, the higher your risk of potentially life-threatening complications.

You also mentioned the risk of shoulder dystocia... yes, its true that risk of shoulder dystocia goes up considerably with large babies. That said, babies under 8lbs 13 oz (4000 g) have a 0.3% chance of shoulder dystocia, babies between 8lbs 13 oz and 9 lb 15 oz (4000- 4500 g) have a 4.7% chance of shoulder dystocia and babies ABOVE 9 lb 15 oz have a 9.4% chance of shoulder dystocia. Also, even if you do experience a shoulder dystocia, doctors can typically maneuver the baby to get them out quickly and efficiently, without significant complications. Here's a good, unbiased article which discusses it http://shoulderdystociainfo.com/anticipated.htm

Lastly, my doctor with my first pregnancy really strongly encouraged me to have a C-section instead of a natural birth (small, tipped pelvis, tipped uterus, prior dislocated hip, etc), and I gave birth to my daughter (8lb 6oz) vaginally without any problems at all - hardly even a tear. My Dr. told me afterwards that she was expecting to get called in for a C-section rather than to catch her. I had a relatively easy delivery and a VERY easy recovery, which I know wouldn't have been the case if I had gotten a C-section.

So that's obviously my bias - you'll have to decide for yourself what you want to do. It's a very personal decision. Good luck

 

[Ms.FuzzyButts]

Hmmm... Not real sure what to tell you other than I think I would have to try it natural. As you said, worst case scenario would be an emergency c-section. But I would have to take a chance on natural. Main reason being that you heal faster. Yes, there's pain from labor... But it is short lived in the grand scheme of things, if you think about it. You can have meds to deal with the brunt of it. I live 25 minutes away from a hospital also. Being a first timer, I don't think I have to worry about dialating so fast that I miss my window for an epidural. And if I do, I've made it that far without passing out from pain, I would hope I could handle it without one if it came right down to it. I just hope it doesn't to come to that....

Edit to say: I honestly think I am more afraid of the epidural than anything. I have a messed up lower back. And my neck too! I had an epidural for the pain in my neck and they told me to expect it to wear off in 6 months. That was 2 years ago and I haven't had neck pain since then. So in m y mind, I am worried if the give me one for birth, it may never wear off.. Now that would suck!

 

[SpringChickens]

Just re-read your post - I think the chance of having problems with being RH negative are actually higher with a C-section than with a vaginal birth. I'm not positive about it, but you are more likely to be exposed to your baby's RH factor during periods of trauma (miscarriage, amniocentesis, birth), and a c-section is much more traumatic than a vaginal delivery. Not positive about that though...

 

[ebwy2]

not telling you what to do, it's not my opinion that matters.

but you won't need as much help as your husband thinks if you do have a caesarian. you'd be in hospital for a few days, and based off my experience here in the UK once you are able to get out of bed (they make you get up on the next day) and are assisted to have a shower you are expected to care for your own baby. Yes, there are some restrictions - once you're out of hospital you can't drive for a few weeks and you can't lift anything heavy but your body will let you know that anyway. You just take it slowly and get on with it (with quite a bit of medication for the pain at the start but hardly any a week later). Things like housework you will need help with for a few days, but you'll have all those relations around anyway so put them to work!

I was scared but it wasn't anywhere near as bad having a caesarian as I'd thought. and my fiance had never held a baby before either but he just got on with it and was fine (no one had told him to expect the baby to be bue when he came out so when he was handed our son he asked "is he supposed to be this colour?" and muttered something about smurfs!)

in the end, I'd say chose based off what you feel would be best for the baby and for you. Your husband's concerns about how much help you may need shouldn't really come into it as it's not his body but yours and his child so he can suck it up and help if you need it.

Could you talk to the doctors about what they think would be the safest option?

 

[Quail_Antwerp]

I had 4 vaginally deliveries, and 1 c-section. I'll take the vaginal deliveries over a c-section any day!

My husband had to help me roll out of bed and get up every day for the first week at home. You cannot just sit up after a c-section. You are not allowed to pick up anything heavier than the baby, and they'd rather you NOT go up and down stairs right away.

I spent the first week home moving from my bed, to a recliner in the living room, and having help off my back porch so I could walk around the yard and see my birds.

You have higher risks of blood clots after a c-section, so they encourage walking to reduce the chances of bloodclotting. I was in a lot of pain AFTER my c-section, and didn't want to take a lot of pain meds since I was breast feeding. It was 3 weeks until I felt minimal to no pain.

Vaginal deliveries - I was only sore when I had an episiotomy (first baby) and I had stitches from the episiotomy. I also had a crappy doc who rushed my delivery because my birthing was making HIM late for a meeting. Nice, huh?

Had my 4th completely natural - no pain meds, etc - and was the best recovery ever. And I was wide awake, not groggy from pain meds, alert and peppy, and was aware of my son and of seeing/holding him for the first time.

With my c-section, my husband said I was tired and slept for several hours after, and I was groggy from pain meds. I did get to hold my son when he was 2 hours hold, but I don't remember it - I have pics to prove it, but have no mental memory of holding him until the second day.

This is not to tell you what decision to make, this is just my experience with a c-section vs. natural delivery.

They have me scheduled for a c-section on September 19 and I'm hoping to go natural.

 

[KellyHM]

I've never had a c-section, but vaginal birth with complications was NOT fun. I had a pretty easy time of labor b/c my epidural was absolutely fantastic, but I pushed for 2.5 hours, with no progress, so the doctor decided to let my epidural wear off (not with my consent!) to see if I could push better. 20 minutes of agonizing pain and sobbing on my part later and the baby went NOWHERE, so they finally topped off the epidural and got out the forceps. I ended up with an episiotomy AND 2 internal tears. On top of that the baby was sunny side up and pointed to the left the whole time, so his eye was bruised and swollen shut from being against my pelvis and I can't even begin to describe the pain in that area when the epidural wore off. It almost made me pass out and it definitely made me vomit. I was on hydrocodone and ibuprofen for 2 weeks and still laid around with ice packs on my hoo-ha for at least a week. I could barely make it to the bathroom without passing out. Like I said, I've never experienced a c-section, so not sure how that would compare, but my vaginal delivery was something I would love to avoid in the future.

 

[suzettex5]

RFF- (SOOOO glad the previa cleared up, and a posterier placenta is good, means its on the back wall of your uterus)

My opinion....

TRY natural, if it is too much for you, they CAN give you a c-sec anyways. They usually make you sign papers consenting to one in any event and if you already have an epidural in, a c-sec is still very much an option.

The pain of early labor is NOT that bad and so tolerable. You WILL know when you need to get that epidural, and I HIGHLY doubt it will be too late for you to get one. 25 minutes is not far, considering this is your first baby. I think you will have plenty of time to recognise labor and to get to the hospital.

A vaginal delivery is really not that hard- YOU CAN DO IT!!!!! If you want to try it, you should. And try it knowing you are allowed to change your mind (usually), ask your DR about it. PLEASE dont fear labor and delivery!!! Its SOOOOO exciting and exhilirating! There is nothing out there like going through the whole process and really experienceing the whole event! Timing contractions, water breaking, driving to the hospital, and finally pushing out that baby!! Its really, truely, amazing! And SO do-able! And an epidural can really help you to actually enjoy the whole process a bit easier.

I think its the fear of the unknown you are experiencing, and until you have actually done it, you wont be sure you CAN do it. But you can! Give yourself permission to try...

Now- should you choose c-section.... NOTHING wrong with that, AT ALL!!! There is something about the peace that can come from knowing exactly when your baby will be born and knowing there are lots of DR's around to make sure all goes well. There are the positives of less pelvic damage and missing the pains of labor (usually), and a good epidural will not leave you groggy, just numb from the waist down for a few hours after delivery (usually). And baby has no 'cone-head' ! (they get that from being in the birth canal while pushing)

The recovery IS harder on you, but not a reason to NOT do a c-sec. It will probably take you about 2 or 3 weeks to be able to move freely without pain. And the scar will not be too bad and will be so low, no one will ever see it (except you and hubby!).

I myself am NOT a supporter of C-sections that are not 100% medically required, but I DO support a womans right to choose, as long as she is fully educated on the risks versus benefits to herself and the baby. I wont go into statistics, you can find those out yourself, and I'll try not to say anything too biased towards my own feelings.

In the end, its not about HOW the baby gets here... its about the fact that baby got here. The birth is a very short event compared to how long you will be raising that child and all the other events life will toss at you.

DONT listen to horror stories, or scary stories. Listen to yourself and make the choice that feels right for you. Dont let peer pressure affect your decision. If you dont want to try natural birth because you are afraid of it, then dont. If you are ready to try vaginal birth, then do it! Its YOUR baby, YOUR delivery, and YOUR recovery. All I hope for is that you and baby are healthy and happy- thats what really matters!

 

[MrsKemmerlin]

Having a pretty brutal morning... feeling like I've got some serious menstral cramps and the pain is radiating down into the upper portion of my right thigh - all in all, making me feel like I'm going to throw up on top of all the pain/discomfort

Calling the Dr at 9am when they open for some advice on relief, or I'm taking my wimpy behind home

...and little miss thing is kicking the heck out of me this morning, in turn, making absolutely nothing better

 

[krcote]

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Feel better soon!

 

[Ms.FuzzyButts]

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Hope it gets better for you fast! Let us know what the doc says....