I just can't take it anymore Update: possessed table tops.

[KristyHall]

Kristy why they are saying and doing these things are because they are WARPED and they want your daddy's money, (they say these things because they are actually talking about their motives and apply them to you too) if you where not around and he died they would take everything or almost everything and leave you nothing. I know you want little or nothing of his (I am sure if he had a small sum of money enough to pay some bills and not much else that you got as an inhearatince and the others got 10x or more than what you got it more than likely not hurt your feelings). I have family like this, I don't want anything to do with them, after my mom dies I won't, she wants to see them and can't drive so I will bear them until then....

That is pretty much how I feel. I agreed to be up for christmas because he asked, but I want to avoid some of these people as much as possible. Until he contacted me last year, I had assumed I wouldn't even be notified when he passed, let alone get anything, He said age has a way of making people want to correct their mistakes from their life, and so I have made a real effort to forgive the fact he was not in my life, and have found that he is really a very nice man.

I think dispite everything, this has been nudging forward a healing process for us both. I don't know anything about his finances, nor do I want to know his finances.

He is a retired stone mason who lives in a little cabin in the mountains of TN with his ailing brother. He built the cabin himself, upkeeps most of his classic tools, tractors and vehicles, and lives a quiet modest life. When I visit he ha sno TV, no Internet, no cell service and spotty phone service. While it drove me crazy at first, I now relish the peace of his and my uncle's simple life, and find myself falling into a more natural rythem with the sun rise and sun set. If you think it's boring there you haven't stayed with him! He stays busy, and I find myself exausted by the end of the day of running, fixing things, hunting, tending the animals, and so on.

I like going there, I like spending time with those two, and learning all sorts of things they learned in their 70+ years.

Thanks for the responses, I feel better, though a little weird, about discussing these things online with people who aren't uin the middle of this craziness. Objective point of views help

 

[oldrooster]

Think of it this way, he may have left you because he may have been too sick mentally (like the rest of the family) and realized he needed to leave you so you'd have half a chance to be normal. the right or wrong of it is irrelevant. Why do I feel like he might have thought this is because as much as I want a relationship and a family I refuse because of the stuff in my family plus the thought of passing on some diseases to my children that seem to run in my family (IE several cancers, depression, and on both sides there are aneurysms that prove to be troublesome if not deadly). So think of it as sparing you (an act of pure love) rather than that he didn't care or hated......

 

[newfoundland]

So sorry for all your problems and the weight it puts on your shoulders. All I can offer is the wise advice, 'sufficient unto the day are the cares thereof'. Just take one day and one task at a time, and happily accept any help you are offered. I am sure that your care and concern for your family will not go unrewarded, and it will all come together.

 

[KristyHall]

Last night my father was admitted to the hospital. I spoke to him briefly a few minutes ago from his hospital room and he still sounds groggy. His heart medicine was messing with him and making his defib go off repeatedly and his heart has been weakened. On top of it he has a sinus infection and maybe phnemonia.

They plan to keep him a few days. I only found out about him being admitted because I called his house to talk to him.

 

[3goodeggs]

Sorry about your dad, but I am also sorry that no one called you to let you know.
Just because we can wish for things to be different, and want things to change it won't make it happen. We can change ourselves but the stuff that whorls on around us will pretty much remain the same.

Try to not let it get to you. You called his home and you found out, and that is what matters. I am always thinking about you and your situation. I wish I knew when I was going through it all how it was going to end up. maybe it would have been easier, or maybe it would have been so much worse.I do not know.

But I do know that We come out the other side different than when we went in, and I am not sure we come out better, just wiser. And maybe in the long run that ends up making us better...
Keep strong.

 

[sourland]

Hoping this is a temporary set back for your Dad.

 

[KristyHall]

Hoping this is a temporary set back for your Dad.

me too. a couple of friends came and kidnapped me and took me to open mike night at the local arts center, and I had just stumbled on that old thread where I posted the story of the time I was a child and saw the KKK burning a cross, and posted it on my face book. Almost immediately after a guy got the microphone on the open mike night stage and went into a 5 minute rant on how obama is an uncle tom and a true racist and that a;ll the wars going on right now are his fault. It was ... interesting, and both wicked nerd and I were so appalled I stood up and read that story then said " it is interesting how some people immediately bring race in when criticizing a politician for his politics and as someone who has actually worked with victims of racism, that is um.. an interesting point of view. It did however distract me from my personal issues.

 

[KristyHall]

I just talked to my father on the phone. He sounds better but he is still coughing pretty bad. He does not have phnemonia and his meds seem to be leveling his heart out. I'll be heading up there for a couple of days when he gets out of the hospital to help him around the house while he recovers.

 

[oldrooster]

me too. a couple of friends came and kidnapped me and took me to open mike night at the local arts center, and I had just stumbled on that old thread where I posted the story of the time I was a child and saw the KKK burning a cross, and posted it on my face book. Almost immediately after a guy got the microphone on the open mike night stage and went into a 5 minute rant on how obama is an uncle tom and a true racist and that a;ll the wars going on right now are his fault. It was ... interesting, and both wicked nerd and I were so appalled I stood up and read that story then said " it is interesting how some people immediately bring race in when criticizing a politician for his politics and as someone who has actually worked with victims of racism, that is um.. an interesting point of view. It did however distract me from my personal issues.

I don't understand people, I don't care for our president on his political standings, I could care less what color, creed or religion he is. He might be the best neighbor or friend a guy could have, for all I know, but the stupidity to base or blame it on his race defies logic.

 

[KristyHall]

I am sending out a hugs to people. I appreciate all the responses and support. Right now I am in Birmingham, waiting for information. I drove my step father to get his biopsy done. We left before dawn to get here on time and they took him in pretty quick, but it seems to have taken longer than expected. The doctor came out personally and told me he is doing well but will be in recovery for at least another hour. That was an hour and a half ago, and I'm growing concerned.

I have reached out to my friends and family and the local community. I am still unwilling to go to the media. We are a very private family, and bringing media attention to our issues just feels strange. So far the emotional support has been great, I have gotten a few calls from family friends offering to help, most I never heard from again. Emotionally I am a heck of a lot better. It felt good to just let it all out online, even if no one reads it, it's just nice to type it.