LIFE RANT!!! (Disclaimer: I'm normally a happy and Positive person)

[WhiteMountainsRanch]

This blog will probably end up being mostly ranting so if you don't care to read that sort of thing turn the page now. Sorry. I am normally a pretty happy and positive person but I am just SO FRUSTRATED right now.

1. I am so beyond frustrated and fed up with not losing weight. I'm STILL 35 pounds overweight after being on spark for oh, what about three years now? And I'd think with all I do I would be thinner by now. I look around and everywhere I see women thinner than me that don't do ANYTHING or put ANY effort into it and are just naturally skinny. I don't get it. Why can't it come easy to me? Why can't I know the magic secret? I *try* and eat healthy, I lift weights, I run cross country, I work 2 jobs, AND own a farm and nursery where I am CONSTANTLY moving. I don't know what the "trick" is, but I haven't figured it out yet. I mean c'mon already. So I get the whole input versus output thing, eat less than you burn and you'll lose weight. Well for me it's not working. If I don't exercise I can usually keep my calories around 15 or 1600, however I don't lose weight when I eat that, plus it's REALLY hard for me to keep them that few... And granted I do slip up sometimes and have more bad days than I'd like, but with all I do I'm STILL fat. I mean C'MON already! So when I ADD exercise to that equation I get hungrier and hungrier and then end up eating what my body feels is "normal" which is around 22-2500, and well DUH I'm not losing weight on that either. Am I eating too much? Or too little? Who knows. I'm inclined to think still too much... I *try* to keep them about 17-1900 if I'm exercising hard, but that seems really hard to do too. I'm ALWAYS hungry.... yet I *try* to eat healthy. Lean meats, brown rice, veggies, lots of fiber and water, yadda yadda. YET I'm STILL 35 pounds overweight. I don't drink soda and I almost never drink juice, I do eat out a bit which I am working on... oh and I mostly drink water or non-fat milk. So weather it's 1500 calories or 2500 I'm not losing, and I run freaking cross country for goshsakes! I don't want to be the hottest, or the fittest, or the fastest, I JUST WANT TO BE NORMAL!!!! Can I scream on here??? NORMAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How can so many girls be thin and not do anything while I work my ass off to be fat!!!

My NEXT rant...

2. So I met the new cross country coach today; the one I've been training with for the last three years is gone now. Wait lemme digress a second. I saw one of the girls I ran cross country with and she's all I gained 10 pounds since last semester and I'm like really where... seriously she has like the best body ever. EVERY girl wants to be her. Seriously... am I allowed to post a picture of her? She's not on spark, is that illegal? I want her body, not like I want her, but can I have her body? Can we be twins? Seriously. Ok back to the new coach. I REALLY like her. She seems SO awesome, she is a professional athlete, smart, and not to mention drop-dead gorgeous! Practically everything I could ever want to be. In fact can we just switch? Can I just be her? No seriously I think she's a model. So I get to talking with her and she says I should be eating MORE! Are you kidding me! MORE than 2500 calories a day, I'll end up like a whale! Oh and she said I should be exercising more too. Ok more than three days a week I get it fine, except that I'm DEAD tired from my workouts already! I mean literally melting into the couch I cannot move dead tired. Ok fine maybe I'm not in "good enough" shape... yeah except I've been doing this (and feeling like this) for close to three years now! I MEAN C'MON! How much do I have to work my ass off to be NORMAL!!!


Ok I think my rant is mostly over, I feel better at least, and I'm sorry to anyone who had to read that whole thing. I feel like I've been fighting this fight my whole life (with Sparkpeople to help me for three years and I STILL don't know what to do).




Ok I'm gonna do it, post pictures that is. They are public pics (her magazine pics) so I don't think there is any issue.

This is my new track coach, isn't she gorgeous! Can I be her? Really? Isn't there an operation for that?

 

[Gardengirl 2011]

WhiteMountainsRanch, first you need to keep in mind that muscle weighs more than fat. With all you do and the amount of exercise you say you do, I can't imagine you being FAT. Do you keep a food diary? If not.........start writing down EVERYTHING you put in your mouth. Drinks, snacks, gum, whatever. Also, by whose charts are you classified as 35 lbs overweight? The reason I ask that is because if I weighed what "the charts" say I should, I'd look anorexic. Seriously! IF I ever get back down to 140 lbs, that puts me in a size 10. If I go by the charts, I should be 115-120. No thanks!

Do you have thyroid issues? Are you stressed or going through hormonal changes? These things can have a HUGE impact on weight. Do you just have a poor self image (as most of us women do) and you're comparing yourself to the models who have been airbrushed and computer transformed for their photo shoot articles? Are you being really realistic or being your own worst enemy? The reason I ask this is because I know a lot of women who are in a size 8-10 who call themselves fat and it falls to self image.

Have you talked to your Dr. about your weight? What does he/she say?

Vent away, it feels good to get it out. But also keep in mind that not everyone is meant to look like the coach you posted a picture of. I'm sure she has self image issues too. She may not be happy with her thighs. Or her biceps. Or her back. Even seemingly perfect bodied people have self image issues.

 

[itsy]

What about if you cut out carbs and did a diet like South Beach or Atkins?

 

[ranchhand]

Uhm.... I know how you feel. But it is true that muscle carries it's own weight, heavier than fat. Obviously, spark isn't working out very well for you, time for a change?

BTW- someone owns the rights to your trainer's pics- probably NOT a good idea to post them without permission.

 

[HeatherLynn]

For some people it just takes extreme measures to lose anything at all. When I was younger and way before kids I struggled with weight already. I would not say I was fat unless you put me next to everyone I knew. I was super active and I ate next to nothing and still I was hefty compared to my friends. Fast forward to me being 20 and sick of it. I cut back and added excercise until I started to see some kind of progress. It took working out 3 hours a day, 7 days a week. It also took eating only 800 calories a day. yes yes bad for me blah blah blah. It worked and if I could manage it again I would do it. It still took me something like 8 months to lose 40lbs. I was running for 3 straight hours every day on the weekend, doing strength training and aerobic during the week with just a dash of running tossed in. I never slipped up. I never cheated. I could not afford to.

I now keep a food diary and I admit I only get 30 min a day 7 days a week and my doctor is at least as frustrated by my weight as i am. I can still run. I do biking. I should do strength but I am struggling to fit in what I do now with the kids and farm. I still only eat around 1200 calories a day and I am overweight by alot. I set my goals in 20 lbs increments at this point.

The last time I lost weight I went on the modified atkins ( lean meats and healthy fats) and still had to count calories because I was gaining. I was gaining still at 1200 calories. I ended up having to cut back to the 800 mark again. It still took me like 8 weeks to lose 14 lbs.

Look at your genes dear. They may be your enemy. If they are then stop beating yourself up and try to be as healthy as you possibly can.

 

[WhiteMountainsRanch]

Quote:

I do, that's what Sparkpeople is, a food and exercise diary (plus much more)...

Also, by whose charts are you classified as 35 lbs overweight? The reason I ask that is because if I weighed what "the charts" say I should, I'd look anorexic. Seriously! IF I ever get back down to 140 lbs, that puts me in a size 10. If I go by the charts, I should be 115-120. No thanks!


I have 29% body fat. I am 5'8" and 190 pounds. "The charts" say I *should* weigh about 135, I would look anorexic. I would be happy at 155. I know I am fat, there is no doubt in my mind.

Do you have thyroid issues? Are you stressed or going through hormonal changes? These things can have a HUGE impact on weight.


I've had my blood tests done, and my thyroid, I was told "everything is within normal range". I wouldn't say I'm more or less stressed than at any other point in my life.

Do you just have a poor self image (as most of us women do) and you're comparing yourself to the models who have been airbrushed and computer transformed for their photo shoot articles? Are you being really realistic or being your own worst enemy? The reason I ask this is because I know a lot of women who are in a size 8-10 who call themselves fat and it falls to self image.


Probably to some extent but I was 135 until I was about 22 years old. I can't stand the way people treat me and look at me differently because I weigh more.

Have you talked to your Dr. about your weight? What does he/she say?


Yes. I went last year and her advise was (after the tests) to subscribe to "cooking light".

Vent away, it feels good to get it out. But also keep in mind that not everyone is meant to look like the coach you posted a picture of. I'm sure she has self image issues too. She may not be happy with her thighs. Or her biceps. Or her back. Even seemingly perfect bodied people have self image issues.


And I agree, that's why I state that I don't want to be the fastest or the prettiest or the fittest, I just want to be back to a normal weight where I feel comfortable and happy. I cannot imagine eating only 800 calories a day, I would literally starve to death, not to mention what a crab-apple I would be!!!



Quote:

I've done that before and lost a tiny bit of weight but that's not really an option for two reasons. One is that I run cross country, that's like draining your car of gas and then going on a 200 mile trip. Second reason is that if I don't get enough of each proportion of carbs, fats, and proteins my stomach hurts really bad, feels like a rock sits in it. I can't ever eat any meal that doesn't contain all three.​

 

[ChicksterJo]

Maybe you can try eating more often but in smaller portions. I think it works for me to some extent. Also, when/how do you eat after you run for cross country? I had a best friend in high school that was very thin and she did cross country - I knew I couldn't be her even if I tried and I'm about 15 lbs. overweight. I took some diuretics for my menstrual irregularity and that only helped me gain weight. Anyway, let us know how and when you eat, because that could be an issue as well.

 

[WhiteMountainsRanch]

Quote:

At LEAST three but more often four or five meals a day. I try to keep them all about the same calories. Today five but should have done six.

 

[ChicksterJo]

I recently heard that eating beans will make your body lose calories faster, because it works hard to digest them. I would try that suggestions - wouldn't hurt, I suppose? What kinds of fats do you include in your meals? Maybe try cold processed coconut oil instead of regular oil? These little things can add up and help some.

 

[dewey]

I bet you're beautiful as is, but I understand not being at the weight that makes one feel most comfy.

The trainer is cute but not what I'd call a real beauty, and lots of fitness/trainer peeps I know could have a hayday pointing out numerous things she needs to improve greatly (and she might say the exact same things, as would most of us about ourselves)...point being, rarely does one think they've arrived.

The calorie equiv of 1 tablespoon of mayo daily over our daily calorie needs to maintain our individual proper weight will add 10 extra pounds a year. 10 pounds. I would gain weight at 1600 calories a day if sedentary (little or light exercise daily). I'd have to run about 3 hours straight to burn off the calories in 2 big gulps, and about 4 hours straight to burn off the calories in a meal eaten out (most meals eaten out unless it's plain broiled chicken or fish or piece of beef so tiny why bother & plain salad and veggies or such). Little things count and add up quick, and exercising like crazy is unlikely to burn all the sneaky excess calories consumed, so the weight stays on or increases.

Most people with knockout fit bodies exercise/train a minimum of 3-5 hours per day. I don't know anyone besides celebs or pro body builders or those making a great living off it that has that kind of time daily to devote to their body without family or something else suffering.

If losing the weight is important, what would work for me is avoiding the sneaky calories altogether, eating low cal delicious foods as a day to day way of life, and getting a totally unattractive coach.

J/K but it truly can be so depressing to compare ourselves to others...because there's always someone more fit, more toned, thinner, or heavier if we're underweight, prettier, and so on.