Naughty kids

[redhen]

Quote:
VERY good idea!!

 

[EweSheep]

Well it has some mixed results.....

When she got the present, she was like "I don't care" kind of attitude Or it may be "I don't know what to say" ..... she read the note from Santa and just simply brushed it off and laughed.

I thought a kid would be a little upset! And the entire time, she opened presents, saying in a very negative way "Kids should not have this", "I don't need this", "I can't have this", "Get rid of this toy", "I got too many toys"......it really dumbfound us with all those comments coming out of her and we just could NOT figure out WHY she was saying it. Why all the negativity?? Hubby was in a very patient mood and letting her know, that we gave the presents FOR her, not anyone else unless she wants to donate the toys. When her ZhuZhu pet didn't fit, she would throw a fit and we told her we will put it up until Daddy can fix it and place the toy on top of the tv cabinet. She was OK about it after she said "Need to get RID of that toy!"

I just don't get it!!!!

We have been three years of family counseling so it looks like the counseling is not that effective in communicating to her trying to put things in perspective and in a very positive note.

Whats disturbing, last night while in bed, she was talking "I'm going to kill you!"

I quickly told her to come out of bed and sit down with me, why she was saying that. She said "I don't know". Then blather about what she saw on TV, Harry Potter and what she heard elsewhere in the store and what she was reading. We let her know that comment is NOT acceptable because kids or teachers take it very seriously when a kid or anyone say that.......due to that school killings. She laughed and said, nothing will happen.

Something IS up with her..........

Yes she got all of her presents under her tree.......she was happy about that! and I'm happy she got them too!

We went to my sister's house for Christmas, and she was fine most of the time. She got a little hussy fit about the Mouse Game but my nephew let her know her actions are unacceptable. She mouthed him off and I stepped in and it stopped. From then on, she was good as she could be. When we got home, it was right back to Ms Sassy Mouth. We sent her to bed, and she crashed within five minutes. Tired I know so we forgive her "sassyness".

Tonight we are going to let her play with no more than three to five toys at a time....it's overwhelming to her to have that many toys out. However she loves the keyboard and made her "music".

RedHen, there would be NO way I would let my hubby not giving her presents. His own mother did that to him, not only for Christmas but birthdays and special holidays for kids. When he was due to move out, there was no present for him on Christmas Day and then he moved out New Years......his parents Christmas gift is the "goodbye". He still resent his family about that, it happened more than 11 years ago.

 

[Wifezilla]

A few of the things you mentioned do not sound like ADD, but Asperger's syndrome.

 

[redhen]

Sweetie.. you NEED to get her to a Psychiatrist .. not just a regular therapist.
She seems to need a mental evaluation...
I think there is more going on with her than just ADHD...

 

[HeatherLynn]

I think I would get a referral for a bit more intensive testing for her. You really need to know what your dealing with. Keeping in mind that I know nothing really this is just my opinion but what you described doesn't sound like a bad child. It sounds like a child that might need a bit of help. My husbands side has autistic and bipolar and adhd. We have had 2 teens with bipolar adhd living with us for a year when we first married. It just really sounds like you need to get your battles properly identified so they can get her proper help.

Actually reading someone else say Aspergers makes me think of my nephew. Now he is on a special diet and has therapy but he still has his moments. The oddest thing might set him off. Like buying a ton of chinese and asking him to choose. He is not used to be allowed most of the foods offered, nor is he used to being given a choice. He stormed off and locked himself in a room. He was 5 at the time. Sometimes when confronted he might go completely silent. Almost like a statue. I guess if figures we might go away, not sure. Other times he will go off and there really is no guessing which way he will go. Honestly he is not that way most of the time. Its almost always about small stuff we would never have even thought was an issue.

Watch out for those meds too. Really watch for changes in personality. One of my sons friend was the sweetest thing until they changed his adhd meds. Now we have to watch him carefully because his has anger/rage issues. Some meds work great and some not so well. Push to get her everything she needs. She isn't bad. There is just a missing puzzle piece and once you have it things will get better.

 

[EweSheep]

How would I know exactly what she has?????? We are waiting for the family doctor to make a call to a psychologist, getting an appointment. I am hoping VERY soon!

 

[EweSheep]

She will start taking Intuniv at one mg. tomorrow.....ugh, I hate to give her meds but glad it is going to be temporarily to see if it will "calm" her engines down. I agree with what you are all saying.....I have to find out what exactly the beast I am dealing with.

 

[Cindiloohoo]

I agree Ewe...she sounds to have more than just ADD issues. She has some sort of complete cognitive breakdown going on. She laughed but equated the note from Santa to her being undeserving of the gifts...that is not ADD that is something else. My ADD child would have taken the note and threw it at someone before she would have went that direction to react, as would all of the kids I know who have JUST ADD. That is odd that she reacted that way. Something is definately misfiring in her mind, and I think it sounds more serious than ADD myself. She does need to see a psychiatrist for a full eval. My friend has and ADD/autistic son who her behavior/reaction reminds me of to a large degree, so the Asperger's and ADD may be the correct direction to look. She needs more help, and it should be sped up, sounds like things are being looked at too slowly. Get her Dr. to speed up the processes and get her help sooner. She needs it, you need it for her...but like has been said, you have to name the beast first, then fight it off. Sounds like you may have to light a fire nder her doctors rear to get things progressing....he/she should not have waited this long to offer help and solutions. Good luck hun

 

[Mattemma]

We don't do santa and (knock on wood) my kids have never been bad,BUT I don't think keeping presents from a kid during the holidays would be a good thing to do.

Maybe give less presents and try to find some way to encourage better behavior through use of the santa myth.Not giving anything but a note saying, "You were bad=no presents...better luck next year!" might help for next year,but boy are you going to have a seriously moody kid for a long time.

Hoping you can find something that will help her!It is probably far more complex than diet issues,but I am reading the NDD book by Dr.Sears,and would recoomend a look at that.Certainly could not hurt.

And that is sad what was done to your dh throughout his years with his parents.I see where he got the idea.Sometimes we forget how bad the things were that were done to us and we end up repeating them.Again, I hope you are able to find what is going on with the little one.Hugs!

 

[darkmatter]

There are no "bad" kids, only bad and misinformed parents. I never disciplined, lied or raised a hand to my kids-----they are well adjusted adults now with higher education, full time jobs w/benefits and families of their own. The most I would do was discuss the consequences culture and society has for certain behavior. Answered questions as if I was talking to a peer. (what they didn't understand at the time, they ignored) Taught my kids to hunt, fish, garden from a young age, showed by example the benefits of hard work and "thinking" things out.