I know of a similar situation a few years ago. The woman now wishes she'd known when she had it good, and acted decently. Not an unusual outcome. And the guy is happily married, to another.
So what do I do now???
- Thread starter TCollier
- Start date
Good for you for giving her the boot!! I'm sure you will find a great woman and be as happy as can be...
I like the rooster example that CityGirlintheCountry said...Except, that one wouldn't work on this farm too well...The roosters that dont work out, get sent to the pot. I dont think the authorities would like that much hehe
I agree with the others ... this is a relationship that should end. HOWEVER, regardless of how angry you are... DO NOT TRASH her possessions. DO NOT leave them where they could be stolen or compromised by the weather. This may well lead to unnecessary drama down the road when she sues you for damaging $5,000 worth of clothes (no, they probably aren't worth that, but people can sue for anything). And while a judge would probably never reward it, you might end up paying a token amount because you didn't 'exercise due diligence.'
I'm not even sure if can legally just 'lock her out' without a 30 day notice, if this is her legal residence, but that is for someone with more education in this area to address.
So, take her things ... TAKE PICTURES ... offer to deliver them to a mutual location, if necessary. When they are picked up, if at all possible, have her or whomever takes delivery of them sign something that says what you delivered and the condition of it.
Anybody who gets angry when she isn't allowed to borrow a truck after driving drunk, could also come back with other passive/aggressive behavior if she thinks you've 'destroyed' her property.
Good luck. Hope you find greener pastures soon.
I'm not even sure if can legally just 'lock her out' without a 30 day notice, if this is her legal residence, but that is for someone with more education in this area to address.
So, take her things ... TAKE PICTURES ... offer to deliver them to a mutual location, if necessary. When they are picked up, if at all possible, have her or whomever takes delivery of them sign something that says what you delivered and the condition of it.
Anybody who gets angry when she isn't allowed to borrow a truck after driving drunk, could also come back with other passive/aggressive behavior if she thinks you've 'destroyed' her property.
Good luck. Hope you find greener pastures soon.
Quote:
I agree with this one. Too many people had their possessions destroyed and got money for it.
As for the lock out, she does not need notice, she was warned and the trust is gone. Bye bye!
I would not tolerate her crap if she had done it before.....she did it again that most people would deny or cover their tracks. They would have to go to a very low point in their lives that they need to get help on their own. You can help them all they want from you but still does it. It is them they need the help and help themselves.
I do not know if it helps to change car keys too in case she decided to take the vehicles for a spin....not good if the cops caught her drinking and you can lose your car that she drove in.
Nope, no bailing her out....lesson learned.
Like I told my hubby, if he ever drinks, his butt would be plastered to the wall and be gone. I know he WON'T because he made his promise to his now deceased grandfather that he swore he will NOT ever drink. His grandfather told him drinking is like a bad drug, makes family upset and wife's life like hell and it does not accomplish anything by drinking away the problems. Grandfather was a drinker, heavy at times but mostly for social reasons to be like his buds in town. Not a fun thing to do. And hubby has seen too many death associated with drinking drivers, seen the results of peeling the bodies out of the cars or under the dashboards......what a mess!
Let us know how you are faring so far....there are plenty of women out there for you that would take you and your chickens in a heartbeat! And please do not pick up women in bars...that shows their true colors.
I agree with this one. Too many people had their possessions destroyed and got money for it.
As for the lock out, she does not need notice, she was warned and the trust is gone. Bye bye!
I would not tolerate her crap if she had done it before.....she did it again that most people would deny or cover their tracks. They would have to go to a very low point in their lives that they need to get help on their own. You can help them all they want from you but still does it. It is them they need the help and help themselves.
I do not know if it helps to change car keys too in case she decided to take the vehicles for a spin....not good if the cops caught her drinking and you can lose your car that she drove in.
Nope, no bailing her out....lesson learned.
Like I told my hubby, if he ever drinks, his butt would be plastered to the wall and be gone. I know he WON'T because he made his promise to his now deceased grandfather that he swore he will NOT ever drink. His grandfather told him drinking is like a bad drug, makes family upset and wife's life like hell and it does not accomplish anything by drinking away the problems. Grandfather was a drinker, heavy at times but mostly for social reasons to be like his buds in town. Not a fun thing to do. And hubby has seen too many death associated with drinking drivers, seen the results of peeling the bodies out of the cars or under the dashboards......what a mess!
Let us know how you are faring so far....there are plenty of women out there for you that would take you and your chickens in a heartbeat! And please do not pick up women in bars...that shows their true colors.
Have you seen TC's homemade cabinet incubator, Ladies??? I'm telling you, he's a catch!
I bet he can do chicken math, too.
I bet he can do chicken math, too.
No, I have not seen his incubator............(running to see what it looked like)
Technically, you shouldn't allow her belongings to be destroyed, even though it may feel REALLY good. Best thing to do with her junk is to have it ready, and have a county sheriff supervise the removal of her things. It would also keep any dramatics from her in check. Good thing you weren't married! She sounds like she thinks she's 20 yrs old. Take some time for yourself before you move on, and SHOP BETTER this time!!! It's better to be alone, then with someone and lonely! Take care, you sound like a very genuine and caring person, but don't let ANY woman walk all over you and take advantage of you! Chickens are the best company.....
I didnt' read the whole thread
but
RUN
RUN
RUN
get rid of her fast
YOU thought ya had something, apparently she doesn't
too many nice, great gals out there to settle for this
hope all goes well for you
but
RUN
RUN
RUN
get rid of her fast
YOU thought ya had something, apparently she doesn't
too many nice, great gals out there to settle for this
hope all goes well for you
PS: NICE incubator!
Do you have plans for it available? Know where I could get some plans? My older son wants to build on for a boy scout project. I'm techni-stupid. He does all things electrical and technical here.
- Thread starter
- #50
OK lets go over a fer comments and such.
AhBee01
AhBee01
I'd set you up with my Mom, but no way am I having a 43 year old step Dad, I'm 42! Just to strange!
Come on it's not like you have to call me Dad or anything. You can call me Tom
As far as her things I did end up covering them with a tarp so they would not be ruined. I will probably move them to the garage today is she does not pick them up. Pictures have been taken. As far as the locks I am standing firm she is out. Her name is not on the lease here and by her choosing to leave and find residence elsewhere for the last 2 nights this is no longer her home and has no rights here. If she would have stayed here then I could not have kicked her out until a 30 day notice.
Incubator questions and plans. I will be more than happy to provide plans or assistance to anyone that would like to build one of the incubators like mine. I designed it and built it and can tell you where to get every last part for it and the costs. it is extremely accurate on temps and humidity and I can do chicken math.
I truely am in a pretty good mood even with all that has gone on. I have a good outlook on life and I am going to find my other half!!! Thank you for all your support. You guys and gals are people I can call friends.
Come on it's not like you have to call me Dad or anything. You can call me Tom
As far as her things I did end up covering them with a tarp so they would not be ruined. I will probably move them to the garage today is she does not pick them up. Pictures have been taken. As far as the locks I am standing firm she is out. Her name is not on the lease here and by her choosing to leave and find residence elsewhere for the last 2 nights this is no longer her home and has no rights here. If she would have stayed here then I could not have kicked her out until a 30 day notice.
Incubator questions and plans. I will be more than happy to provide plans or assistance to anyone that would like to build one of the incubators like mine. I designed it and built it and can tell you where to get every last part for it and the costs. it is extremely accurate on temps and humidity and I can do chicken math.
I truely am in a pretty good mood even with all that has gone on. I have a good outlook on life and I am going to find my other half!!! Thank you for all your support. You guys and gals are people I can call friends.
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