teenagers

[deb1]

Quote:
I use work as punishment sometimes. It is wonderful. You kids can clean out the fridge, scrub the toilets, weed the yard, etc. They hate, hate, hate such jobs and it works wonderful.

My kids already do most of those as regular weekly chores.
And she already does her own laundry (since we didn't do it 'right').

She doesn't care about learning to drive.
She sees no job she wants to have.
She has some genuine health-related issues going on, but plays them up when things are seriously not going her way.
And when she bats her baby-blues at her dad he usually caves and plays me off as the bad guy...

It is so difficult to raise kids if the parents aren't united.

My oldest son didn't seem to want to learn to drive. Eventually, at 18, he did get his license. Now he is eager to save enough money to get his own apartment. I have no idea why he changed so drastically but it has been for the better so I am just thankful.

 

[Dar]

there is a canadian comedian Russel Peters...he does a skit about when he was a child and he disrespected his indian parents...to make a long story short the father says to the son...it will take social services 20 minutes to get here....someones gonna get a hurtin....

sorry just a lil comedy to lighten the mood...

Embedded media from this media site is no longer available

sorry i forgot to add the skit i posted has some foul language in it...its an 8 minute skit

 

[cluckychick]

When my son turned 16 he became a horrible child. DH was working nights and I had to deal with him and couldn't. I suffered, our home suffered, it was not a good place. When he turned 17 he was worse. He eventually said "I wanna leave" and I said "go". I couldn't take it anymore. I let him go...I bawled but did not allow him to take anything with him that wasn't his. No car, computer or cell phone. He called my best friend and moved in with them for about 6 months. He moved back home, graduated high school, started college, has a job. He's a good kid and he's matured but he also knows I've climbed out of my barrel and that I'll never allow him to put me in that place again.....

It helped that my DH switched to days and now all the after school hours are not on my shoulders as I felt they were then. It's hard to be a single parent and that's what I felt like.

 

[FarmerDenise]

deb1 wrote:

Have you considered taking him to a therapists? There is no telling what type of abuse he might have endured from his mother or one of her friends.

Yes, I have. But he is not my child and his father is not going to do anything the kid doesn't want to do. I am sure my stepson was abused: watching mom's boyfriend beat up on her, beatings from mom, not to mention being taken from his dad and the rest of the family, not knowing where he is going to be next, is traumatizing to a child. If he were mine, we'd have been to the therapist in a New York second. And charges filed against the mother and boyfriend.
I can just stand by, watch, put up with and on occasion try and be a voice of reason. I try to be the sane, calm one, who is also strong enough to let a teenager hate her and not take crap from said teenager either.
I lived through my daughter hating me and I'll manage having a stepson hate me. My daughter and I are best buds now. Once she went off to college, she realized how good she had it, especially compared to other kids. And came home and told us so. That was a wonderfull feeling.​

 

[danamillette]

Quote:
Holy Cow!! I needed that. TOO FUNNY! Thanks everyone for the support.
This too, shall pass. Right?

 

[mom'sfolly]

I think teenagers are hateful so that by the time they are completely grown you can kick them out without feeling too guilty. Its all part of testing the boundaries, ya know, setting pecking order and finding out if you're the top roo, boss hen or someone else entirely.

 

[ntiveheart]

*sighs* raising teenagers is like trying to nail jello to a tree!

 

[HobbyChickener]

Dana

I am with you all the way. The only major difference is mine is a girl. It has been a rough road for us over the last year or two. I can't seem to get it in her head that her mother needs to be her friend not her enemy.

She was causing us greif with the whole cell phone thing too. When we started the contract for her it was just an add on to our contract so we were only looking at $10. This allowed us to turn off the home phone and save a little cash so it seemed like a good idea. We told her that with any more than her calling us and us calling her she had to pay for it - text - interenet - overage calls. She excepted and was paying for her unlimited (Thank Goodness) texts (5200) in the first month. She got in trouble a couple times and we took the phone / life line from her for a couple days and she lived through it and straightened up for a LITTLE while. As a typical teenager she doesn't have long enough attention span to be good very long but it comes and goes.

She has made the comment before about moving to grandma's to "get away from us horrible parents" and I told her that was fine she could wait on the proch for grandma to get there as there wouldn't be a need to pack cause everything she had I owned and it wouldn't be leaving and to also remember when she walked out that door she wouldn't ever walk back through it (needless to say she has never left).

She will do things to push our buttons I think for something to do more than anything and I think a lot of that is just because she is trying to find her place. She is not a big fan of not getting everything that she wants handed to her either but she is learning to appreciate what she does get a lot more if she works or pay for it which is the way her mother and I were both raised and the way her and her little brother will be. They have to be taught that everything in life that is worthwhile is earned not given and anything posessed can be lost.

She no longer can text or recieve texts on her phone. She can not call long distance on her phone. She does not have free access to the interenet w/o being signed on by me or mom and has no access to the history so I can tell where she has been. If someone ever comes up with the text plan that is password erased she might get it back.

Keep a strong hold with the direction you are headed. Your child needs it. They don't and won't like it but as someone has already said they will become good adults and be glad you made them that way.

I am truely starting to think that children are your parents way of getting even with you

. And if all else fails treat them like the chickens - As long as they are making eggs they are fine, otherwise they are headed for the frying pan!


Hobby

 

[seismic wonder2]

I opened my trap ONCE and got

that was 20 years ago.

nothing like a good "beatn" to get your mind right....so to speak.

 

[2468Chickensrgr8]

Quote:
Good Morning....I have a feeling your the type of Grama that would pump your grandkids full of goodies and then send them home... for sweet revenge.....hee hee

I think I am going to put that quote on my kitchen wall.....love it !!!