Things you never said until you had chickens.......

[SteveBaz]

Whos going to lay for pappa today?
The beating will continue until you all make an egg today.
OK who pooped on my foot!
OK Sophie help me find ALL the girls, where did you put them.
What did we need at thew store again? Bread, milk, cereal, flack seed, layer feed, veggies fore the girls, hamburger, buns get extra the girls like it.
Get the kids off the fence.
No Sophie (our grand daughter) you have to play in the coop with the girls not in your room.
Why cant they sleep in just one day!!!!!

 

[3 Blonde Ponies]

Okay this isn't exactly a CHICKEN but you'll get the point.

Years ago I left my horse at a certain stable to be trained. ( Little old lady who lived and breathed horses was the head trainer and she was a horse whisperer long before the phrase was coined. ) Anyway, she preached to all the horse owners that you should always have chickens at your stable to bomb-proof the spooky horses. She had a few chickens a LOT of roosters and one lonely peacock wandering around at all times. Some people left their horses at the stable, some just shipped them in for an hour or two lesson so their were trucks and trailers of all sizes and shapes coming and going.

One day a certain very well to do lady brought her really fancy rig with her daughter's very expensive warmblood gelding for a lesson.

"Miss Ann! Could you PLEASE get your peacock off my Hummer? He's scratching the finish!"


Devon

 

[Mykee]

 

[bug fead]

"Thanks for the eggs ladies" - spoken loud enough for the neighbors over the fence to hear
"OK mother cluckers, get in the coop now"
"Reily! Leave the friggin chickens alone!" - to my corgi, Reily

 

[P-Funk]

Said during a house party of an 8 year old girl. "Deja just walked into the house carrying a chicken"

 

[Texas Granny]

I went to care for a disabled family member early one morning and discovered the chickens and one goose had gotten into his house. The hens were all perched on his bed rails and the goose was guarding the door. A big smile was on our family member's face -- the hens were singing a soft chicken song to him! Later after I had a go in the hospital, I had the same experience with the hens singing to me at my bedside at home while recovering. Now when I get down in the dumps I go outside and tell the girls "Granny needs a chicken song".

 

[hangartnerchix]

Awww! What good chickens!

 

[stellas mommy]

"what's that on your butt? Chicken poop... Don't act like you havent sat in it before too..."

"What's for dinner?"
"Eggs "
"When can we have somethin else for dinner?"
When you can teach the birds to lay steak and lobster hunny"

 

[stellas mommy]

My favorite one my husband always cocks his head at me when I say is...

"oh good morning ladies how are you doing this morning? Good, well I don't know what to make for dinner tonight..." Then I start naming them off... "chicken dumplings, poppeyes, kfc..." and then I look at them again and say ughooom, I mean blue egg layer, dark brown egg layer, light med egg layer... I wonder who isnt going to lay today"



My absolute fav with my husband is I will walk outside because I'm hearing strange noises and I will see my husband sitting in a white lawn chair infront of the chicken pen talking to our turkey in there...
My husband - "blaaahahahaha"
Mrs Gobbles - "gobbles gobbles gobbles
My husband - "Blararhahaha
Mrs Gobbles - "Gobble gobble gooble?
My husband - "Bleregalagla!!!!!

It'll go on for about 10 min back and fourth until I say somethin and then he gets back to working on the car or something. Then he will turn back to me and say (in the dog whisperer voice) I AM THE TURKEY WHEEEESPERER! hahaha

 

[Charlamayne]

ahahahahahhaha that is awesome