A word of advice: Don't do anyone a favor if you expect one in return

[Laurajean]

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Yeah, I see where you're coming from. Ugh, it's just one of those things when you're looked in the eye, and given their word -- you know? ...and I wouldn't complain if I was shown gratitude at the least, I would have been satisfied with just that. I know what you mean, about checking her reaction, it's just awkward to have to remind someone...

Last year, after my son had all his surgeries, she had offered to do remediation therapy with him over the summer. I gave her a copy of his neuropsychologist's report and for her look at and come up with ideas. Nothing ever happened after that. A few weeks later she asked me how he was doing and I told her, even admitted that I needed help with him because I didn't really know what I was doing and she didn't offer any suggestions or techniques I could try. She just moved on to the next subject like I was talking about the weather or something. So now as far as I know, she has a piece of my son's medical record.

I still say you should remind her. I think it would be more awkward letting this simmer. Just blurt it right out! "Hey, I keep meaning to ask, are you going to make that donation or did you just wanna pay me the 10 bucks?" No need to dress it up, just come right out and ask. She might say "Oh my god, I'm so sorry! Here, let me give you the ten dollars" etc., or she might not have forgotten, in which case calling her out on it is a good thing. People need consequences for their actions. If she did this on purpose, she's probably hoping you'll feel too awkward to bring it up. Don't let her get away with that, if that's the case!

 

[debilorrah]

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Yeah, I see where you're coming from. Ugh, it's just one of those things when you're looked in the eye, and given their word -- you know? ...and I wouldn't complain if I was shown gratitude at the least, I would have been satisfied with just that. I know what you mean, about checking her reaction, it's just awkward to have to remind someone...

Last year, after my son had all his surgeries, she had offered to do remediation therapy with him over the summer. I gave her a copy of his neuropsychologist's report and for her look at and come up with ideas. Nothing ever happened after that. A few weeks later she asked me how he was doing and I told her, even admitted that I needed help with him because I didn't really know what I was doing and she didn't offer any suggestions or techniques I could try. She just moved on to the next subject like I was talking about the weather or something. So now as far as I know, she has a piece of my son's medical record.

I still say you should remind her. I think it would be more awkward letting this simmer. Just blurt it right out! "Hey, I keep meaning to ask, are you going to make that donation or did you just wanna pay me the 10 bucks?" No need to dress it up, just come right out and ask. She might say "Oh my god, I'm so sorry! Here, let me give you the ten dollars" etc., or she might not have forgotten, in which case calling her out on it is a good thing. People need consequences for their actions. If she did this on purpose, she's probably hoping you'll feel too awkward to bring it up. Don't let her get away with that, if that's the case!

I agree with this. Ask anyone that has had to deal with me - I am TERRIBLE at getting stuff done. I forget easily, in like 10 seconds. I NEED to be reminded or it will never happen. I don't do this on purpose, it's just me.

 

[Gen9]

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What is this tasty salad dressing? Now I'm curious.

X2

 

[Gen9]

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Lol that's what I should have said

 

[Gen9]

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Yep that is usually us - not a lender or a borrower

 

[Gen9]

Well I think I will go ahead and ask flat out. She won't even expect me to and will catch her off guard. I'll let ya'll know how it pans over. Thanks for hearing me out!

 

[debilorrah]

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Lol that's what I should have said

In my case that would not be a lie.

Seriously though, any favor I do for someone, it is never done with the thought that I will paid back. If someone asks me to buy something for them, the answer is always no unless I know for a fact they are down on their luck. Sounds like this gal hosed you, though a good blatant reminder sounds in order.

Though some people think I am irresponsible, absent mindedness is not something that can be cured.

 

[Laurajean]

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Lol that's what I should have said

In my case that would not be a lie.

Seriously though, any favor I do for someone, it is never done with the thought that I will paid back. If someone asks me to buy something for them, the answer is always no unless I know for a fact they are down on their luck. Sounds like this gal hosed you, though a good blatant reminder sounds in order.

Though some people think I am irresponsible, absent mindedness is not something that can be cured.

Who would think that absentmindedness makes you irresponsible? That would be a pretty ridiculous presumption! I get absent minded too and forget things. It happens. Doesn't mean you're irresponsible! And you're right, can't be cured that I'm aware of. I try very hard to remember things, I even write things down and make lists. But then I forget where I put the list!

I've had a foggy memory since I became ill about 11 years ago. I still think I'm very responsible however! I do the best I can, and I'm sure you do too.

 

[Gen9]

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Lol that's what I should have said

In my case that would not be a lie.

Seriously though, any favor I do for someone, it is never done with the thought that I will paid back. If someone asks me to buy something for them, the answer is always no unless I know for a fact they are down on their luck. Sounds like this gal hosed you, though a good blatant reminder sounds in order.

Though some people think I am irresponsible, absent mindedness is not something that can be cured.

Awww don't worry my mom is also absent minded, she has pulled her car out of the garage with the door still shut but she is still the most generous person I know.

Yeah I only do something for someone with out expecting a return if it's going to improve one's quality of life. I thought it would never come to this because she lives plenty comfortable ...and then some!

 

[debilorrah]

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In my case that would not be a lie.

Seriously though, any favor I do for someone, it is never done with the thought that I will paid back. If someone asks me to buy something for them, the answer is always no unless I know for a fact they are down on their luck. Sounds like this gal hosed you, though a good blatant reminder sounds in order.

Though some people think I am irresponsible, absent mindedness is not something that can be cured.

Awww don't worry my mom is also absent minded, she has pulled her car out of the garage with the door still shut but she is still the most generous person I know.

Yeah I only do something for someone with out expecting a return if it's going to improve one's quality of life. I thought it would never come to this because she lives plenty comfortable ...and then some!

That is sooo funny about your mom doing that. I drove to work once with my slippers on and no make-up. I TOTALLY got wrapped up in new hatchlings and completely lost track of time and thought I was ready. I got to work and found out I wasn't.